There’s not much we can really say with this post because it’s all about the visuals. The 2011 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show took place yesterday at the Lexington Avenue Armory in New York, and all our favorite models, including Alessandra Ambrosio, Doutzen Kroes,Â Adriana Lima and Miranda Kerr strutted their stuff. We did miss seeingÂ Heidi Klum, who retired as a Victoria’s Secret Angel last year.Â The music performances took it up a notch too — that’s if a Victoria’s Secret show can ever be taken up a notch? Jay-Z and Kanye West doubled up on stage and performed “Stronger” together. Adam Levine and Maroon 5 also performed, and Levine cozied up to model and girlfriend Anne Vyalitsyna while singing “Moves Like Jagger.” You couldn’t miss Nicki Minaj either, with her frothy pink wig and day-glo clothing.
But we’re keeping you from the pictures, and for that we apologize. Knock yourselves out, guys. It’s all in there!
[Photos: Getty Images/ ]
UPDATE (6:25pm): Sorry Dave Letterman, but the cover’s been spoiled. If you want to know who landed it, we’ve got the winner after the jump.
While the 2011 Oscars won’t be held for another few weeks, tomorrow is the day that’s known in supermodel circles as the “Bikini Oscars.” Yes, that’s right, the 2011 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue hits newsstands tomorrow, marking a day that is loathed by shrewish librarians, dreaded by cashiers at drugstores nationwide, and revered by horny dudes the world over.
Sure, the widespread prevalence of internet porn has stolen some of the luster away from what used to be regarded as the Fourth of July for masturbators, but that doesn’t mean that Sports Illustrated has lost its power to turn famous, barely clothed supermodels into slightly MORE famous, barely clothed supermodels. Take, for instance, Brooklyn Decker, who went from being a really hot bikini model in print magazines to being a really hot bikini model in major motion pictures after she landed the cover last year! If that isn’t proof positive that landing the cover of of the Swimsuit Issue can change a gorgeous young woman’s life, I don’t know what is.
So, with that said, who will be this year’s Brooklyn Decker? Take a highly unscientific, wildly biased and possibly offensive look at the seventeen candidates for the crown in our FABLife gallery below. Will it be the woman who escorted Lady Gaga to the Grammys in an egg yesterday, Anne V? Could former Victoria’s Secret model Izabel Goulart end up being the face that launched a thousand boners? Or will Brooklyn Decker be a repeat winner, putting her well on her way towards being this generation’s Elle MacPherson? WE! DON’T! KNOW!
In case you were looking for supermodel Heidi Klum’s beauty secrets to help you somehow become a mother of three with sick abs, we have some bad news for you. As Heidi explains to Self, “The ultimate beauty secret for a woman getting older is, Don’t be too thin! It is always better to have a little meat on your bones.” You do not have to worry about the quantity of our bone meat, Heidi. We’re less concerned with whether our cheekbones look too pronounced, and more worried about whether we can wear a towel wrapped around our waist instead of all our pants that we can’t zip.
Explains 37-year-old Klum, “When you are just muscle, you end up being gaunt in the face, and that makes you look older by 5 or 10 years.” No, Heidi, that’s just what other people look like! You can’t compare your own Germanic water nymph complexion to your average America woman of the same age. We’ve been eating McDonald’s since we could speak; they probably only fed honey and fresh goat’s milk while living on a fresh mountain hillside. It’s like comparing flawless apples to old, gross oranges.
But despite the fact that she left her angel duties before the Victoria Secret’s Fashion Show this year, takes care of her babies and husband Seal, and is still aufing people on Project Runway, Klum’s not worried about the ravages of time catching up with her: “I don’t have anxiety about it, so I’m not running to get Botox. Maybe that will change, but I don’t think so. I feel comfortable in my skin and comfortable with aging, so I think it’s okay that I get wrinkles.” Ugh, she is going to get like one wrinkle, and it’s going to look like an adorable dimple, isn’t she? We can just feel it. [Photo: Getty Images]
Well, here’s a party that will give us nightmares. It’s Paris Fashion Week, and last night Vogue threw a masked ball that looks like it was quite a debaucherous but elegant affair. Basically everyone from the fashion and modeling world was there in some variation of mask that ranged from elegant to haunting to 7-11 robber who wore fishnets instead of traditional pantyhose (that would be Tyra, could you tell?)
We haven’t seen so many funny/scary pictures from a party in a long time. Kate Moss looks trashed (could that look and hair be intentional? With her you never know), Lenny Kravitz looks like Zorro, and Dita Von Teese looks exactly the same as she always does. If you have an aversion to clowns. mesh, or Eyes Wide Shut, proceed with caution.
UPDATE! We were so right about Tyra. She actually did fashion her mask out of an old pair of fishnets. She Tweeted about it, saying: “So FRENCH VOGUE mask is sum cheap FISHNET stockings I got n crazy store n Paris! I cut em up n made it y’all. N did my ow hair n makeup.” You don’t say.
Since firstly teaming up with Topshop in 2006 for her eponymous fashion collection, party-hard supermodel Kate Moss hit it off with billionaire owner Sir Philip Green. The mis-matched pair have been papped out and about numerous times since then, and last night made quite an evening of it at the mogul’s 57th birthday party.
Although we do wonder what they find to talk about (Philip: “I’ve just made another million quid today, Kate!” Kate: “Oh, me too, nearly! Ha ha!”), stepping out of Annabel’s nightclub in London with that “concentrated staring at the floor” look, we’re sure they had fun by the looks of it. So much so that Kate managed to have a wardrobe malfunction in the back of the taxi. Good times!
Pamela Anderson Gets Boob Out On The Catwalk
Even A-list boyfriends have those occasions when the missus drags you out to something you’d really rather not have to do. In Jamie Hince’s case, it’s the Chanel show at Paris Fashion Week. As girlfriend Kate Moss shares a so-good-I’m-crying joke with Mario Testino and Claudia Schiffer, we can’t get enough of the hangdog expression on The Kills‘ rocker’s face. Can we go home yet, honey? [Photo: Splash News Online]
No, it’s not the latest horror movie brought to you by the people who created Saw. Sadly, this story out of Brazil is straight up true. 20-year-old model and Miss Brazil contestant Mariana Bridi da Costa was misdiagnosed by doctors as having kidney stones, when really she had a severe urinary tract infection. By the time her medical team realized their mistake, a blood infection called septicemia was raging through her body, cutting off circulation in both her hands and feet. With no other choice left, the doctors first amputated her feet, then her hands.
Doctors even had to remove her stomach during her last surgery due to internal bleeding, and Mariana is currently on life support. A message on her website begs for prayers. “Continue praying for her,” it reads. “The doctors are doing everything that is humanly possible to save her, but only God can really save your (sic) life.”
Her boyfriend Thiago Simoes had this to say, “…she is a very strong person and we just want her to survive.” [The Sun/CNN]
In August ’08, someone created a page on Blogger called Skanks In NYC, posting candid photos and slanderous comments about model Liskula Cohen. “How old is this skank? 40 something? She’s a psychotic, lying, whoring, still going to clubs at her age, skank.” If that wasn’t crazy enough, a commenter named “liveandlove” offered colorful retorts two months later:
After finding your blog I stopped to think about what kind of monster you must really be. To target a woman so aggressively to attack even the stupidest of ill facts. I feel sorry for you “anonymous little blogger”. Why do you hide behind that anonymous title? Are you afraid of what Liskula can do to you? She is a very powerful woman, as I am sure you know. What exactly has she done to you? Does your boyfriend want her? Probably, most men and women want her. She is tall, thin, beautiful, super kind and generous to a fault. Is it her success? Is it the fact that everybody loves her and she gets respect everywhere she goes? Are you one of those little dumpy girls who hang off her every word? Or do you wait three hours in line at a club, when she breezes right in?
Zing. Now Cohen is suing Google, which owns Blogger, to find out who started the site. “I’m tall, I’m blond, I’ve been modeling for many years, and people get jealous,” said Cohen. “If I had to deal with everyone who is jealous, I wouldn’t have time to do anything else.” Will Google fight to protect the identity of anonymous haters, or will they toss the name to Cohen and wash their hands of this ridiculous debacle?
So Gisele Bundchen may or may not be engaged to hunky quarterback boyfriend Tom Brady. So what? There are plenty of other sultry and sexy supermodels out there, complete with bangin’ bods and no ring finger bling to be found. Let Scandalist introduce you to 10 of our favorite cat-walking cuties, who are single(ish) and ready to mingle, or at least allow you to ogle at them from afar.
The Victoria’s Secret angels hawk products and make us all feel bad about our lives. [Photo: GettyImages]