Nicole Polizzi

by (@unclegrambo)

Dr. Snooklove or: How Snooki Stopped Worrying And Learned To Love The Jersey Shore

Waaah-hoooo! On the cover of the new issue of Rolling Stone, America’s favorite pickle addict/diminuitive star of the Jersey Shore, Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, is pretty clearly paying tribute to Slim Pickens’ famed rocket ride from the stone classic 1964 film, Dr. Strangelove or: How I Stopped Worrying And Learned To Love The Bomb. That said, we’re fairly confident that this Stanley Kubrick reference was lost on our gal Snooks.

In a video interview taken during the cover shoot (which we’ve got for you below), she compares the rocket ship she’s straddling to Seabiscuit, but not because of the extreme speed with which both the rocket and the famous equine moved. Nope, “Seabiscuit” is a reference to the size of her housemate Vinny’s, um, “ding dong” (her words, not ours). Glad we got that clarification! As the interview continues, she also discusses what life is really like inside the Jersey Shore house (“It’s just like prison, with cameras”), as well as her aspirations for life after the show (“What I’d like is to turn out like Jessica Simpson, with her whole brand. She makes millions”), among other bits of Snooki-related marginalia.

Oh, and did we mention she deep throats a pickle, too?

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Snooki Bagged And Booted In DC

Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi visited DC yesterday to host a look-a-like competition, and was immediately greeted by fans, who may or may not have have outnumbered the bags she was handed. Good thing no one tried to give her those before the flight—even Jersey Shore stars still have to follow carry-on luggage limits. That said, how was it trying to get those giant boots through the metal detector?

See photos of our heroine in the gallery below.

[Photos: Splash News Online]

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by (@missmuttoo)

Jersey Shore Just Got Mini-Me’d

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Gah! Our eyes! It’s pint-sized Snooki, mini-Situation and little J-Woww! Luckily, this isn’t for real. At least we hope so. All we know is the JWoww tweeted this picture of these tiny guidettes and guido, writing, “Omg lol classic RT @HannahNeverman: love this. @sn00ki @ITSTHESITUATION@JENNIWOWW”

We’re thinking it’s a very late Halloween picture by a fan or friend? ‘Cause these kids are adorable. We can’t have them fist-pumping or getting their GTL on at this age.

[Photo: TwitPic]

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Snooki Hates Being Called Snooki, But Is It Her Name That Makes Her Famous?

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Snooki, whose given name is Nicole Polizzi, is fed up with her nickname. Polizzi revealed the origin of her famous nickname on Rachael Ray‘s talk show last year saying the name was given to her because she was the first of her friends to make out with a boy. “So you know Save the Last Dance Snooki the cootchie crook? It was the D.J.,” Polizzi told Ray. “Anyway, my girls started calling me Snooki, so it just stuck ever since. I was in eighth grade!” Even though the name’s been around for years, she recently said “I miss my real name. I miss people calling me Nicole.”

We totally understand and think she could make the transition from Jersey Shore Snooki to regular person Nicole.  Hey, Marky Mark eased into life as Mark Wahlberg, and The Rock is now semi-serious actor Dwayne Johnson, so people have a tendency to move on, although not without the occasional reference to the past. What do you think, would Snooki be as successful if she went back to her old name, or does she need to be Snooki to stay on top of (or inside, as the case may be) the ball?

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@unclegrambo)

Jump Start Live‘s Morning Buzz For Thursday, January 6

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VH1′s Jump Start Live will be coming to a TV screen near you from 10-11am each and every weekday from now until the Critics’ Choice Movie Awards air on Friday, January 14 at 9pm. If you haven’t been watching the show, what’s stopping you? As part of the show, host Carrie Keagan and her trusty wingman, comedian Gabe Liedman, talk through some of the biggest headlines of the day during a segment called the Morning Buzz. In case you missed it, here’s what they covered today:

Don’t forget to tune in to Jump Start Live tomorrow morning at 10am/9c to see guest apperances from Tron‘s Garrett Hedlund and musician James Blunt.

Update: We just got word that Jump Start Live will be providing an exclusive scoop during tomorrow’s show about a couple of presenters at this year’s Critics’ Choice Movie Awards. BIG hint: Eva Mendes and Jimmy Kimmel will be part of the show!

[Photo Credit: Getty Images, MTV]

by (@hallekiefer)

McCain Says Snooki’s Too Hot For Jail, Finally Proves That He’s Cooler Than Obama

mccain-snooks-550rnrnIn a desperate attempt to seem hip to young people, John McCain once again spills the beans about his hopeless crush on Snooki, this time during a radio interview. Yesterday, the former Presidential candidate practically swooned into the microphone while talking to Phoenix’s KMLE, agreeing that, “I kind of think she might be too good looking to go to jail,” when asked about the Jersey Shore star’s recent run-in with the law. So, did his handlers just show John McCain a picture of Snooki and say, “This is what people find attractive now”? Or did they have to Photoshop a bustle and parasol onto her before he really got it? Because, seriously, ew. rnrnAlso, let’s be honest here, people. As much as we love and cherish our Snickers (almost too much, our therapists would argue), she …how should we put this… she definitely has the goods to be crowned Miss Edna Mahan Correctional Facility for Women 2010. That poof was born to conceal a shiv, a pack of smokes, and a slightly smaller poof underneath it. Luckily for McCain, his infatuation is far from one-sided; the May-December lovebirds have tweeted at each other, and Snooki has mentioned before that she thought the 73-year-old Senator is “really cute.” Which, once again, ew. rnrnWe, on the other hand, continue to be baffled by how hard McCain is working to seem relevant to the younger generations. Is this going to be part of his 2012 campaign? God help us if knowing about Snooki determines whether or not someone will be elected leader of the free world. Wait a minute…we know EVERYTHING about Snooki! Get the Palin on the phone; we’ve got a nation to lead! [Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

Snooki Vows To Stop Drinking (During The Daytime, That Is)

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After her recent run-in with the boys in blue, Snooki has been surprisingly reflective in interviews (and no, we’re not referring to the glare of her hot dog-colored skin). Quoth the Snicks, “I just felt really bad, so I’m definitely going to stop drinking during the daytime.” Jeez Louise, why don’t you just join a nunnery while you’re at it!? Look, we don’t watch reality television to see people act responsibly and make mature decisions; we watch it to find out who is going to be the first person to throw up in the hot tub (our money’s on Ronnie!).

Snickers also admitted that her appeal doesn’t stop at the schoolhouse door:  “When I see 7 year-olds, they’re like, ‘Oh, I envy you.’ I’m like, ‘Why? You’re seeing me party.’” Why Snooki is even interacting with 7 year-olds in the first place, we may never know. We blame the schools! But seriously, the only reason a little kid would think Snooki is cool is because she is approximately the same height and size of a first-grader; they probably just confused and assumed she was their age, which is totally understandable, AND would actually make for a pretty amazing show.  It would just be the regular Jersey Shore crew and one outrageous 7-year-old with a giant poof and a Capri Sun bong. Don’t front, you know you’d watch it. [Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@unclegrambo)

Breaking: Snooki Arrested By Jersey Shore Police For Disorderly Conduct

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In the first season of Jersey Shore, Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi was “Snookin’ For Love.” However, during the third season, it appears that she’ll be “Snookin’ For Bail Money” instead. The diminuitive Princess of Poughkeepsie was just arrested by New Jersey police on domestic disturbance charges. Not many details are available right now, but TMZ is reporting that she was bonging beers on the beach all afternoon long. We’ll keep you posted as we learn more.

Oh, before we go, FREE SNOOKI!

[Photo: Splash News]

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by (@katespencer)

The FABlife’s Ultimate Guide To “Jersey Shore” Star Snooki

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It’s official,”Jersey Shore’s” Snooki - Nicole Polizzi by birth – has saved television with one fell swoop of her wee body on the dance floor. You know, this backbend-y, thong-flashing move:

This orange-skinned adora-dwarf has taken the mundane, washed up world of reality TV and somehow made it interesting again, with just a hair poof, a pickle fetish, and an earnest love of house music to guide her. Of course she couldn’t do it without the help of her Shore housemates, but there’s something about Snook that makes her stand out, even if she only clocks in at 4’9.

In her glorious, Poughkeepsian honor, we’re collecting every Snooki-related tidbit we can find – photos, videos, hairclips – and sharing them with you, dear readers, in this here post. We’ll update it accordingly as she continues to spread her brilliance around the globe, spritzing her genius upon us like a giant can of hairspray.

Heaven awaits you, under the jump!

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