Only Tom Hanks could drop a filthy f-bomb on Good Morning America and have us find him more endearing. Maybe it’s that mustache? It’s very sweet in a dad way, very Mr. Belvedere on a long weekend. Maybe it’s because we know Hanks was trying to get into character to demonstrate his Cloud Atlas accent for host Elizabeth Vargas? “I want people to buy my f—ing…” Hanks growls. No, it’s because T. Hanks claps his hand over his mouth and bugs his eyes like a scandalized seven-year-old when he realizes his blunder. Don’t worry, Tom! We’ve heard (and seen) worse on-air celebrity gaffes. 10 of them, to be precise!
Is it really “side boob” if 94% of your chest is visible? Can it be called a ‘nip slip’ if your dress was never designed to cover your nipples anyway? Speaking of nipples. where … where are they? They are going to have to make a Men In Black IV just to get to the bottom of these mysteries! Germany’s Next Top Model contestant Micaela Schaefer took to the Men In Black III red carpet in Germany wearing what appears to be unspooled VHS tape tied to a necklace. We are always telling people to belt it. We’ve just never been referring to Halloween streamers they bought at the party supply store!
Other stars like Will Smith, Josh Brolin and Nicole Scherzinger also attended yesterday’s premiere, not that you’d know it. Seriously, how is it that Micaela here can wear what amounts to an electrical tape gown in public and not be immediately escorted off the premises as the rest of us would? We need answers! Someone get us Tommy Lee Jones, a black suit and one of those dealies that erases your mind! On second though….just the mind-erase dealie. We’re way too lazy to travel through time for this…
[Photo: Splash News Online]
This guy again! Is Terry Richardson some kind of warlock? Don’t answer that; the world is not ready to know. After teaching Kate Upton how to Cat Daddy and doing an extensive photojournalistic study of Rihanna’s Daisy Dukes, Terry Richardson posted more of his concert travels with Lady Gaga who, for reasons unknown to the rest of mankind, took out one of the girls complete with an electrical tape pasty for Terry’s camera. “Me as Gaga… Gaga as Me in Tokyo,” the photographer wrote along with the pic. The resemblance is uncanny! It’s like we’re looking at two identically skeevy twins!
Well, at least Gaga’s looking frisky in her photo, which is nice to hear considering the non-stop barfing she’s apparently been doing while on tour. “Yes Tokyo! Tonight was the first BTWBall that I didn’t puke during show. (yes its that hard) xoxoxxxo Love, gaga+terry,” Gaga tweeted yesterday. Unless…unless Gaga being sick all the time somehow explains why she is constantly hanging out with Terry Richardson? Like somehow she got a brain worm that makes Terry seem like way less of a perv than he seems to be? There has to be some sort of explanation for all this, people! We demand an explanation!
[Photo: Terry Richardson]
Jennifer Lopez has spent the last decade establishing to the world how sweet her booty looks. JLo’s near nip slip is already so Oscars 2012. What’s new body part can the American Idol judge bring to our attention? How about some of that sweet, sweet bulge? Okay, so Jennifer’s package is just the weird padding on a pair of boxing shorts, but we demand you look at her new V Magazine cover and tell us you aren’t immediately forced to glance at her crotch. It’s like a magnet for the eyes…pervert eyes!
At least V waited until today to release the magazine cover; we shudder to think of how costar Steven Tyler would have teased JLo about her new genital enhancement last night. “It was no nipple!” Lopez exclaimed on Idol Tuesday night when Tyler teased her about her revealing Academy Awards dress, yanking down his shirt into a more scandalous cut. “That was a reenactment of the Oscars,” Ryan Seacrest laughed. Okay, okay, but seriously, what body part is there left for JLo to blow out minds with? We need to start brainstorming for next year’s red carpet. How about legs? Legs are good. Feet? Arms? El…elbows?
[Photo: V Magazine]
It may be beating a dead horse at this point, but what will it take for Lindsay Lohan to ditch the bleached hair, resist the (apparent) collagen, toss the cigs and put away her boobs? If homegirl wants to regain her long-lost rep as a serious actress, her latest photo shoot with Terry Richardson is not how to do it. In the classically Richardson B&W series, she spreads her legs, blows smoke, flashes nip and looks dead-eyed into the lens.
To make it clear, we’re on Team Lohan. We want her to clean up her act and defy the odds of growing up in a cray-cray family. However, she tests our fandom time and time again with her bad girl antics. Clean it up, LiLo. And please, for the love of Cady Heron, bring ginger back.
[Photos: Getty Images, Terry Richardson’s Diary]
If we didn’t like AnnaLynne McCord before (and, frankly, we were neutral), we love her now that we’ve read her response to what could have been rightfully known as the AnnaLynne McCord Topless Twitpic Scandal of 2012. “My only response to all these lovely people is, ‘He who be without sin cast the first stone,'” the 90210 actress told Global Grind, when asked about haters hating on the scandalous picture she accidentally sent a fan last Friday. “If you have never messed up or done anything wrong in your life, then please, feel free to judge me.” Is it gauche to give a standing ovation if the person you’re clapping for can’t hear or see you? Oh, like that’s ever stopped us before!
While some people might wonder why any famous person in their right mind would pose for a photo sans bra, then send it via social media to a total stranger, McCord isn’t about to pretend she feels bad about the experience. “I’m a human being and we make mistakes,” McCord shrugs. So … can we go ahead and put AnnaLynne’s Twitpic on the $1 bill already? Oh, like you weren’t thinking it too.
[Photo: .com/FayesVision/AnnaLynne McCord’s Twitter]
Depending on your denomination, either Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or Eid came early this year in the form of these Coco photos from the Richie Rich runway show at New York Fashion Week. Thank you again, universe, for this living study in flawlessness.
Ice-T‘s wife slipped into a little My Little Pony-meets-Sexy George Washington hair ensemble yesterday to strut her stuff for the designer’s Spring 2012 show in New York City. It almost goes without saying that a Coco nip slip was also featured on the runway. “I started working with those glasses and out came a boob and I was like, Oh man, this is what I didn’t want,” the model/actress/human angel told E! Online after the show. “I don’t get embarassed, I wanted to walk with perfection and that wasn’t perfection for me.” Coco, everyone other creature on the planet would like to politely disagree.
[Photo: Getty Images]
Those tuning in to watch Nicki Minaj perform on Good Morning America this morning got a lil more Nicki than they bargained for. The rapper’s Malibu Barbie-Tastic outfit contained her famous donk, but she wasn’t quite so lucky on top. Yup, Nicki pulled a Janet Jackson in the middle of performing ‘Moment 4 Life”. Not that it seemed to bother her that much. She just adjusted her tank top and continued to rock her Cyndi-Lauper-on-PCP steez by gnawing on a chicken leg like a feral valley girl. Your guess is as good as ours.
Despite the five second delay, the boob-flashing incident moved too fast for ABC censors to pull the plug. Predictably, some parent’s groups are already making their displeasure known. “For the umpteenth time in recent memory a morning news show has included inappropriate content for children and families,” said Tim Winter of the Parents Television Council to TMZ. Will the “slip”-up affect her vocal role in the upcoming Ice Age 4 alongside fellow R&B star Drake? We doubt it. Check out more in the (censored) not-quite-safe-for-work gallery below. Happy Pink Friday everyone!