Oksana Grigorieva

by (@hallekiefer)

Mel Gibson Allegedly Facing Charges For Domestic Abuse

If this news surprises you at all, we have one million bridges we’d like to sell you. Allegedly Mel Gibson will face criminal charges for domestic abuse, unless his lawyer can successfully intervene on his behalf. According to RadarOnline, prosecutors met with Gibson’s attorney Blair Berk yesterday in a last-ditch attempt to head of charges of domestic violence/corporal injury, which could be prosecuted as a felony or misdemeanor. Sources close to the case, however, say the wheels are already in motion. “The District Attorney has a very strong case, there is a lot of information that the public and Mel Gibson are unaware that the DA has,” an insider revealed, making the only thing shocking thing about this news is why it didn’t happen months ago.

As of this afternoon, District Attorney Steve Cooley says the case is “actively in review,” but has not decided whether charges will be brought. In case you can’t remember which parts of the eternal ballad of Mel were illegal rather than just morally repugnant, the charges would stem from Gibson’s admission that he slapped ex Oksana Grigorieva, which she remembers as a much more brutal attack. Guess all those threatening phone calls were just a freebie! The news comes just days after officials at the SXSW Film Festival announced The Beaver will premiere there in March. Looks like Mel will get out just in time to shoot the sequel. Or if we luck out, never.

by (@hallekiefer)

Oksana Grigorieva Claims Mel Gibson Beat Her During Sex

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It’s been a while since we’ve wanted to take our eye balls out and scrub them down with bleach, but here we are again after reading news that allegedly Mel Gibson beat Oksana Grigorieva during sex in order to get in the mood. TMZ reports that, while giving a deposition under oath, Grigorieva revealed that Gibson would strike her in order to get past his problems getting aroused. Where is that bleach bottle when we need it? Oh here it is…OH NO IT’S EMPTY.

Mel’s ex gave the testimony as part of Oksana’s ongoing custody battle with Gibson over their daughter Lucia. Supposedly Oksana did not bring up the allegations in her pre-trial interviews with the L.A. County Sheriff’s Department, nor at any point prior did she mention them in relation to threats of violence Mel had reportedly made. Considering that it makes us gag to even read that claim, we understand why she would have hesitated in saying it out loud. That being said, the fact that Gibson had his visitation rights extended last month make us wonder how many more terrible things will come to light during their time in court…and how many of them can be verified.

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Mel Gibson Wins More Time With His Daughter

Mel Gibson had his child visitation rights extended by an LA judge earlier today, according to TMZ. While the judge reportedly said there were “no winners and losers” to be found in this edict, getting extra time with your daughter after her mom accuses you of physical abuse and making death threats sure sounds like a win to us. Especially, when the mom in question, Oksana Grigorieva, tried to strip Mel of overnight visitation rights entirely.

The pair will maintain joint custody of little Lucia, and Mel had his previous allotment of time—6 days every two weeks, 3 overnight—extended by a little over a day. Guess the judge bought Mel’s claim that he had to slap Oksana to save the baby…though not enough to keep the kid away from her either.

[Photos: Getty/]

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Mel Gibson Wants Sole Custody Of Oksana’s Baby

Mel Gibson & Oksana

There has to be a third option. TMZ reports that Mel Gibson plans to seek sole custody of  Lucia, his child with estranged partner Oksana Grigorieva, on the grounds that she just won’t stop saying he’s an abusive psycho. Despite her frequent media appearances accusing him of countless threats and violent episodes, the Edge Of Darkness star recently claimed that he only slapped Oksana to keep her from shaking their baby during a meltdown. For tarnishing his otherwise sterling reputation, Mel wants his former mistress to have but the briefest, most monitored visitations with the lucky combination of their gene pools.

Oksana continued her public attack on her super-rich babydaddy on Larry King last night.  “He hit me and choked me in front of my son and brandished a gun at me,” she told America’s Grandpa, despite warnings from the court about airing their issues in public. “I stayed a little bit too long…He asked me for the last chance. He begged. He cried. He cried on his knees. What am I supposed to do?” She still denies leaking those infamous tapes of Mel ranting to the press, claiming they were only recorded so he could hear them in a future intervention scenario. If only he could go back to being the married anti-Semite she fell in love with.

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

Mel Gibson Had To Slap His Girlfriend To Save His Baby, Says Mel Gibson

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We think we finally figured out why Mel Gibson has been acting so insane for the last…as long as we can remember: he was just trying to save babies! According to a recently released declaration he filed July 23, Gibson slapped Oksana Grigorieva in an attempt to save their baby Lucia after Oksana became “hysterical” and he feared she would accidentally hurt the child. Well, in that case, slap away Mr. Gibson! The slapping floor is yours!

Explained Mel. “I slapped Oksana one time with an open hand in an attempt to bring her back to reality. I did not slap her hard, I was just trying to shock her so that she would stop screaming, continuing shaking Lucia back and forth.” Ugh, we really hope none of this is true. It’s bad enough picturing a baby in danger, but when Mel Gibson is the sane person in a situation? You know things have taken a turn for the epically terrible.

Said Gibson in the report, “While I do not believe I handled the situation as well as I should have, I was worried about the rough way Oksana was shaking and tossing Lucia around.” AS WELL AS I SHOULD HAVE. Now that’s the understatement of the year. And we’re assuming Oksana was running around shaking that baby all over for no reason. Certainly not in response to anything her belligerent mad man of a boyfriend was doing. No siree bob….

According to the declaration, Mel also says he did not hit Oksana or knock any of her teeth, false or otherwise, out of her mouth. “There was never any blood on Oksana and none of her teeth were ‘broken,’ although one of the false veneers from a tooth apparently did come off, I did not see that occur at the time.” Well if Mel didn’t see it, it must have not happened! Glad to have that all cleared up. Now pardon us while we curl into a tiny ball in the corner for a few hours and quietly mumble to ourselves. [Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

Mel Had To Fork Over A Buttload Of Guns To Police

In the latest news from the terror mind, police reports show this past July Mel Gibson surrendered his guns to police…and yes, that was guns, as in plural, as in multiple guns. Apparently when Oksana Grigorieva took out a domestic violence restraining order against him a few months ago, standard police op required Mel to hand over all weapons, a list we’re imagining included everything from “anything light enough for Mel to pick up and heave at a police cruiser” and “every curse word known to man.”

Unfortunately, what was actually on the “Receipt for Property Taken Into Custody” recorded on July 15 is way more disturbing, as you’re about to find out. The firearms Gibson had to have pried out of his blubbering, maniacal hands were:

  • A blue steel, semi-automatic 9 millimeter Glock handgun
  • A blue steel, semi-automatic  9 millimeter Beretta handgun
  • A blue steel, semi-automatic 12 gauge Benelli shotgun
  • A blue steel, lever action Winchester rifle
  • A magazine for the Glock
  • A magazine for the Beretta
  • A speed loader for the Glock

How we wish we still lived in a world were “Blue Steel” was merely a Zoolander reference. Well, at least Mel didn’t have a tank. Not one that they made him hand over, anyway…

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Bless-phemy! Mel Gibson Goes To Church Amidst Another Audiotape

Another piece of the dysfunctional puzzle has been put into place: Mel Gibson decided to go to church, well, his church. This weekend the controversial actor (that’s putting it nicely) was spotted for the first time since the scandalous, abusive audiotapes with Oksana Grigorieva went public strolling from his Malibu home to the private Catholic Church he built in 2003.

According to reports the church was on lock down since Mel could be a target for violence. Security guards were reportedly checking IDs at the door and checking cars in the parking lot. We were hoping for further reports and testimonials from churchgoers saying that Mel saw the light, collapsed into tears by the altar, confessed his sins and begged for forgiveness, but no such luck. That would have been one Hell of a story though, right?! Um, we’d apologize for swearing but this is Mel Gibson we’re talking about. F*ck it!

Instead, The Passion of The Christ star is under more fire and brimstone for yet another leaked audio tape targeting Timothy Dalton, Oksana’s ex. Thus far, Mel’s rants have consisted of racial slurs, sexually explicit insults and strings of curse words so long and so loud even we had to cover our ears, but this Timothy Dalton rant is taking it to another dimension of insanity and perversion when he accuses a silent Oksana of having sex in front of her son. He begins the phone conversation surprisingly calm (for him) telling Oksana that she is “not a f*cking woman,” and for her to “f*ck Dalton.” Then the screeching begins, “You f*cking don’t love me one bit and you know it.”

Please Lord, hear our prayer – make Mel and his scary tapes stop!

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7 Probably True Facts About Mel Gibson Revealed In Oksana Grigorieva’s Music Video

Yet another horrifying Mel Gibson recording has been released, worsening the case of Post-Traumatic Mel Gibson Rant Stress Syndrome we’ve come down with since the start of this mess. In order to remedy our situation we’ve turned to the Mel Gibson-directed music video for ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva’s musical masterpiece “Beautiful Heartache.”

Lo and behold, we’ve uncovered a plethora of previously unknown deets about the actor and his former love just by watching “Beautiful Heartache” over and over again. Dig a little below the surface and you’ve got a pair passionate about flamenco dancing, red lip gloss and knives. Who knew?  Below are the 7 probably true facts about Mel and Oksana we dug up while watching – and cringing – and the magic they made together.

  • 1. The lyric “I love the way you wear your skin” is a direct reference to the wolf skin pelt Gibson would put on before attempting to run barefoot across the neighbor’s pool cover.
  • 2. All evidence suggests that neither Gibson nor Grigorieva were at any point aware that the song and the video are both really terrible.
  • 3. Due to budgetary constraints, Gibson had to forgo pyrotechnics, and instead just screamed at the piano until the keys burst into flames.
  • 4. In one of the leaked audio tapes Gibson rails about the large sum of money he purportedly sunk into Grigorieva’s musical career. However, in reality Gibson drunkenly burned $475,000 in a bonfire on the front lawn, then had his personal assistant pick up some supplies at Joanne Fabrics for the video.
  • 5. It has been reported that Oksana Grigorieva was born in Russia and brought up in the Ukraine. She was actually created in a mannequin factory, then shipped to a department store where she was brought to life by an old Egyptian spell.
  • 6. The dance scene that appears at the finale of the video was initially supposed to be shot at the bottom of Gibson’s Jacuzzi. When informed that this was not physically possible, Gibson squeezed a bottle of Fanta so hard it exploded, embedding a sliver of glass in the face of Josh Groban, who had stopped by to return a borrowed sweater.
  • 7. Gibson was initially going to play the knife thrower, and would be credited, per his request, as “Mal Gabson.”  He then repeated the name and laughed maniacally for 3 days straight, thus missing the shoot schedule.

- Halle Keifer

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Mel Will Not Be Moving Down Under

Over the weekend it was reported that Mel Gibson would be moving back to Australia, the country where he grew up. It makes sense for Mel to get back to the former penal colony of his childhood given his recent (potentially criminal) behavior. The report said that Mel was selling his California and New York homes and also claimed he’d be fleeing with his ex-wife Robyn, who wrote a letter to the court defending him. A source said “[Robyn] has persuaded him that he needs to get away from Hollywood and find peace on his ranch, and she will go with him along with some of the children.” So would Mel really reconcile with his ex and move the hell away? Could it be that easy? Alas, no.

Gibson’s reps deny that he is moving, saying “There’s no truth” to the Australia rumor, which means that we’ll be stuck with the blow-job hungry actor for a while longer.  The saga of Mel and his ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva is never-ending, and news today is that Oksana may be in trouble for doctoring images and the audio tapes we’ve all had the pleasure of hearing, and that her dentist may also be punished for not reporting the alleged abuse against her as well after she came to him with broken teeth.

Ugh. Maybe we all should move to Australia instead, to get away from these people.

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Mel Gibson’s Ex-Wife Defends Him

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Just the other day, we were wondering how Mel Gibson‘s ex-wife Robyn felt about the tapes the revealed an unflattering portrait of her former husband. Was Robyn ever on the receiving end of some of Mel’s harsh outbursts over the course of their thirty year marriage? Apparently not!

TMZ reports that Robyn actually filed a sworn declaration on behalf of Mel to be read in court. It says “Mel never engaged in any physical abuse of any kind toward me before, during or after our marriage. . .Mel was a wonderful and loving father.” The statement will be admitted as evidence in Mel’s defense should a case be brought against him. Mel divorced Robyn while Oksana Grigorieva was already two months pregnant but despite that, it seems that Robyn still holds Mel in higher regard than Oksana. She says the charges of violence Oksana is claiming are “so beyond the truth.”

[Photo: Getty Images]