sex

by (@katespencer)

GQ’s Glee Cover Gets Our Teenage Hormones Raging

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We (being me, Kate Spencer) do not watch Glee. We tried, we failed, we’ve moved on. But we might just re-set our DVR if the cast came out and sang “Don’t Stop Believing” wearing booty shorts and knee-high socks every week. Lea Michele is welcome to be the biggest b*tch in the world if she wants, looking like this. Because that, friends is how you become popular in real life! Or that’s how it always looked to us unpopular kids.

Lea was joined by cast-mates Dianna Agron and Cory Monteith for the GQ cover and story, and she’s got another provocative pic inside the mag straddling a locker room bench (you can thank Terry Richardson, natch). Inside she reveals that the night Chris Colfer (Kurt) came over to cheer her up with a pint of ice cream and Madea Goes to Jail was “the best night of my life.” Just goes to show that Glee is G-rated no matter how many lollipop-sucking photos the cast takes.

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[Photos: GQ]

by (@katespencer)

David Arquette Admits To Having Sex During Separation, Says Courteney Did Not Have Affair

Whew. We just got through listening to Howard Stern‘s interview with David Arquette, and once again the King of All Media has scored a major scoop. We took notes during the entire thing and will try to get down all major points below. The biggest thing we took away from David and Howard’s candid chat is that he still loves and cares for Courteney Cox, and they are definitely trying to work things out as mature adults. David was refreshing and honest, which is something most celebrities (and their PR people) balk at. He even admitted to have quit drinking a few weeks ago but owned up to having a drink last night. We’d gulp down some booze too, if our 11 year marriage was the topic of everyone’s convos.

Without further ado, the deets from our notes:

  • Courteney initiated the separation. Says David, “On our eleven year anniversary Courteney gave me a motorcycle. She said to me, ‘I don’t want to be your mother anymore.’ She doesn’t want to tell me ‘don’t do that and don’t do this.’ She doesn’t want to nag me anymore. I respect that with all my heart.”
  • The couple is currently living in separate houses, and David is in therapy. “I’m trying to grow up, trying to be my true self, to figure out my true self and world, as is she.”
  • The separation started a while ago, and if it were up to David the couple would be married and together right now. Even though, David says, “she has her own issues – tries to take one everyone’s problems, be a mother to everyone.” Hm, like Jennifer Aniston perhaps?
  • David did, indeed, have sex with another woman during the separation. While he did not name Jasmine Waltz specifically, he seemed to be insinuate she was his one conquest. He says, “I don’t have a girlfriend. I had sex with a girl once. Okay maybe twice.”
  • David confronted Courteney on her rumored affair with her co-star. She denied it. “I truly don’t think she every had an affair with Brian Van Holt,” he says. “I do believe her on that level. On an emotional level, I think she may have seen a guy who talks and bonded with him, yes.”
  • They told their 6-year-old daughter Coco about their split during a beach picnic. “We went to the beach and had a picnic and explained to her, ‘we’re grown-ups and a lot of times grown-ups need to figure out their lives.’”
  • David and Courteney’s sex life started to die while they figured things out; they haven’t had sex for four months. Still, he said of their physical relationship: “My sex with Courteney is methodical…but so full of love.”
  • David wants Courteney back. He says, “In my defense I didn’t go out and f*ck everything in the f*cking world. It’s one girl, and all the best for her. I’m never going to do anything with her again. I’ve been begging Courteney to get back with me. and she’s conflicted too.”

Though David is “free to see other people,” he seems truly invested in making the marriage work and says of his wife, “We’re best friends. She’s the greatest woman I’ve ever met.” Awww. He’s always seemed a little odd to us, but his openness and honestly with Howard totally won us over. Make it work with him, Court!

by (@hallekiefer)

Betty White Will Never Stop Wanting To Have Sex

And why should she?!? America’s Favorite Memaw Betty White claims your sex drive never disappears, no matter how old you are. As the sexiest senior citizen we know, we’re inclined to believe her. Says White in AARP, “Does desire melt away with age? I’m waiting for that day to come.” Pointing to her head, Betty explained, “Sexual desire is like aging. A lot of it is up here.” Betty than pointed to the backseat of her Camero and gave everyone a big wink, just in case her grandkids didn’t feel awkward enough already.

White, who stars in the upcoming You Again with Jamie Lee Curtis and Kristen Bell, went on to dish about her first, brief marriage: “I married my first husband because we wanted to sleep together,” she claims. “It lasted six months and we were in bed for six months.” Seriously, imagine your own grandmother telling that to a wide-eyed reporter while handing him or her a Werther’s Original. We WISH our grannies were that awesome.

White spoke lovingly – and hornily – about her third husband Allen Ludden, saying that currently “I don’t have a fella, but if Allen – or Robert Redford – were around, we’d have a very active sex life.” Or both, Betty! Imagine all the three-ways she’ll be having…in Heaven. Betty White: actress, legend and truly an inspiration for nymphos everywhere.

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This Guy Really Isn’t The Best Choice To Be A (Fake) High School Principal, Huh?


Ferris Bueller’s Day Off is one of our all-time favorite films (only slipping behind The Sound Of Music by a hair), so it’s with a heavy heart that we point out the fact that, in case you hadn’t heard, Principal Ed Rooney is a dirty old man.

Jeffrey Jones, the actor who played the principal outsmarted by the smoothest high schooler there ever was, was arrested back in 2003 for paying to take explicit photos of a 14-year-old. Since then, he has had to register himself as a sex offender each year. To be honest, we think registering yourself as a sex offender once a year is even easier than taking a once-monthly Boniva pill that Sally Field and her bendy bones love so much. I have to do something one time every year? To stay out of prison? Not a problem! Except that it is. Jones didn’t register himself last year, so he could have faced up to three years in prison. A judge ruled though that three years of probation and 250 hours of community service were enough punishment though. Personally, we’ve always like those sandwich boards that sex offenders have had to wear that explain their crimes – we think Jones and Roman Polanski should have to wear those wherever they go.

by (@katespencer)

Is A JoBro Giving Up His Purity Ring For Ashley Greene? Say It Ain’t So, Joe!

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Joe Jonas, he of the brows and the bros, has apparently tossed his purity ring aside to get, uh, closer to Ashley Greene, his rumored girlfriend and the world’s prettiest mediocre actress. Ashley and Joe have been spotted flirting and kissing in public, and a source (aka: Nick Jonas) told Life & Style, “When they’re not traveling, they’re basically living together.”

Woah, living in sin so soon? That can only mean one thing – Joe’s ready to bone! He’s apparently been spotted without his purity ring, which makes us wonder – has he finally offered up his virginity to his latest special lady? If this is the case, do Demi Lovato and Camilla Belle‘s vaginas feel dissed or totally relieved? Ah, the things we wonder at 5:15 PM.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@katespencer)

Jesse James Looks Really Psyched About Downgrading From Sandy To Kat

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Poor lil’ Jesse James. While girlfriend Kat Von D looks thrilled to be hanging off of his inked arm, he looks, how should we put this, a little bummed about banging a bunch of trashy ladies behind A-List ex Sandra Bullock‘s back and losing the glamorous life they once shared. Oops! Lesson learned dude – a little poon goes a long way…in ruining your life.

Lucky for Jesse, Kat is straight obsessed with his Vanilla Gorilla routine. She’s even gone as far as to tell People magazine she’s “in love” with the guy, because what’s celebrity romance without diarrhea of the mouth? Let’s review her recent revelations, eh?

  • “Jesse is only my ninth boyfriend. I don’t hang out with anybody unless I am in love.”
  • On Jesse being the one: “I believe he is, so yeah.”
  • Revealing when they first really connected (aside from in bed): “Was it when we were playing Scrabble? I don’t remember. But it was something like that – when we both realized how nerdy we were.”

Jesse was less chatty when elaborating on the affair. When asked if he was happy, he simply replied, “yes.” As for what he likes about Kat? “Everything.” What’s wrong guy? Ex-wife got your tongue?

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Emma Watson Has Clearly Never Read Twilight

We are Harry Potter nerds, and as such, anyone involved in the franchise can do no wrong in our eyes. However, we found a quote from a recent interview with Emma Watson to be kind of peculiar. Emma explained the romantic element of the final Potter films, she said “This kiss between Hermione and Ron is highly anticipated, it’s been building up for eight films now. And Harry Potter is not Twilight, you know; we’re not selling sex.” Don’t get us wrong, we love everything about Emma, we love her new pixie hair, and mostly we love Hermione Granger, but we found this to be weird, since Twilight is 3,000 pages of sexual tension and about 2 pages of island sex.

These are the books where the main characters do it all of two times (in no gratuitous detail, thanks for nothing, Stephenie Meyer) before a monster starts growing inside Bella, trying to punch, kick and eat it’s way out.  Sure, there’s the mental image of Robert Pattinson biting his pillow to downy bits which we’d pay good money to see, but there’s only about 2% more sex in Twilight than there is in Harry Potter. Just, you know, to clarify. Of course we don’t blame Emma for not reading the books, girlfriend has movies to shoot and Ivy League universities to attend.


by (@hallekiefer)

Breaking Dawn Birth Scene Will Be As “Intense” As The Book, Says Director

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Anyone familiar with The Twilight Saga has always had plenty of questions about the Breaking Dawn birth scene: How will they film it? What are they going to show? How many gallons of fake blood will the prop department drizzle over Kristen Stewart? Well guys, get ready to watch the scene with your hands clamped over your eyes like you’d hoped, because according to screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg and director Bill Condon, the Breaking Dawn birth scene is going to be every bit as jaw-dropping as the original.

Says Rosenberg, “We’re working on it. And we’re working on it to be as intense as it is in the book.” We appreciate their refusal to cop out on such an important scene; it’s an integral part of the final book, even if it does require Robert Pattinson to “assist the delivery” in a way that would make even the most hard-core horror fan shudder.

Adds Rosenberg,”I don’t think it’s about the amount of blood you show,” she says. “It’s on their faces. It’s all from Bella’s point of view when you’re seeing what’s going [on]. It should feel visceral. I think it’s going to be pretty intense.” We can’t wait! We just have to remember to bring our smelling salts to the movie theater; we don’t want the usher to worry if we fall into a dead faint. Which we almost certainly will. [Photo: Getty Images]

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New Book Claims John Travolta Loves Cheating On Kelly Preston With Men

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Well this isn’t great news to break while you’re expecting a new baby: a new book claims that John Travolta has cheated on Kelly Preston repeatedly with men throughout their nineteen-year marriage. The book is entitled “You’ll Never Spa In This Town Again” so take these claims with a grain of salt scrub, we guess, because the author, Robert Randolph, says that Travolta’s indiscretions are the stuff of legend. Says Randolph “John Travolta has been cheating on Kelly for years! And when the details emerge, he’s gonna make Tiger Woods look like a boy scout.” Well, that can’t be good.

The Travolta gay rumors have persisted for years, as have the rumors that Scientology is just a brainwashing attempt to “turn” people in denial straight, and Travolta is level five Thetan or whatever – basically he’s a black belt in Scientology. But a book about a secret gay spa subculture (seriously!) which brazenly makes accusations against someone as famous as Travolta is big.  One thing making this rumor appear more fact than fiction: a photo that the National Enquirer has of Travolta kissing another man. No word on whether Travolta will sue over the allegations like fellow Scientologist Tom Cruise did when he was accused of having a gay affair a few years ago, but one this is for sure: if this story’s true, our minds will apparently not be the only things that have been blown.

[Photo: Splash News Online]