Good news for those of us who watch 27 Dresses, The Devil Wears Prada and Bride Wars over and over again on cable while hungover on the couch sitting in a sea of bagel crumbs: we’ve got a new go-to rom-com to indulge in! Clocking in at just under two hours, Something Borrowed nicely fulfills every cliche we so desire in a wedding movie. It’s a movie ripped from the pages of Rom-Com 101, and while it’s fun to watch, it’s also absolutely, utterly terrible. We loved—and hated—every second of it.
Ginnifer Goodwin (decked out in cinema’s worst wig since Bella’s horrific headpiece in Eclipse) plays Rachel, a good girl who feels bad about herself despite being a beautiful lawyer with a ROOF DECK. We all know people in NYC with roof decks have NOTHING to be sad about, right? She’s inexplicably still BFF with her childhood friend Darcy (Kate Hudson), who seems to have no job other than insulting Rachel and seeing how wide she can open her mouth. Darcy is engaged to Rachel’s law school buddy Dex (Colin Egglesfield), despite there being absolutely zero chemistry between them. Oh – in one scene we hear them having loud sex, so we guess that means they’re meant to be together forevs? Egglesfield looks like a Tom Cruise untouched by the crazy-making ways of Scientology and has the charisma of a robot whose batteries are on their last legs. Thus it’s extra confusing as to why Rachel is still in love with him and not her platonic pal Ethan, played by zing-slinging pro John Krasinski.
