American Horror Story’s second season, “Asylum”, premiered last night with with more scares, sex, and mystery than ever. While returning cast members like Jessica Lange and Evan Peters are back in full creepy mode, there are many new faces to this season, which can only mean new characters to enter into the twisted world that is Ryan Murphy’s imagination. Among the new cast includes Maroon 5 front man Adam Levine! In honor of his smooth transition from the soulful crooner to brooding actor, we are recapping this season’s premiere episode with corresponding Maroon 5 songs because, come on, some of these dark characters might just need a bit of upbeat rhythm in their lives!
As someone who had to stop watching The Walking Dead because I was having weekly zombie nightmares, I have no idea how I managed to last through an entire season of American Horror Story. Every time the credits would roll and I’d see those awful baby faces, my stomach would churn. And yet I lasted right down to the bitter, bloddy end, and tonight I am back for more. The second season is a complete departure from the first, which is weird but also…cool? It’s titled “Asylum,” which should tell you everything you need to know about the setting and all the horrifying things we’re about to bear witness too. Just in case you need ‘em, we’ve got five other reasons to tune in tonight (just be sure to have a blanket to hide under when things get creepy).
1. Jessica Lange plays a nun. A crazy, ranting nun with a Boston-ish accent — aka something just about every kid who grew up in Massachusetts has experienced firsthand.
2. Evan Peters is back as Tate and still killing people, which is how we like our Evan Peters. The only way I’d like him more is if his character somehow gets together with the Asylum version of Taissa Farmiga‘s Violet. Sure they were a doomed couple, but I’m holding out for their HEA anyway.
3. There is a serial killer named Bloody Face, which is the most obvious and cliched name for a serial killer, but also the most awesome and terrifying.
4. Dylan McDermott is set to return this season, per a tweet from Ryan Murphy today. If Murphy knows what he’s doing, this should most definitely mean a return of Dylan’s bare butt checks too.
5. “Adam Levine‘s on a payphoneee trying to call home, as a serial killer tries to murder him with an ax.” Yes, the Maroon Five lead singer is a star on AHS this season, alongside Jenna Dewan, Chloe Sevigny and Mark Consuelos. Even better — Zachary Quinto and his furrowed brow is back on the show, too.
[Photo: 20th Century Fox]
You can always count on VH1 to ask celebrities the most important questions on the red carpet. We headed to the Emmys with one mission and one mission only: to get as many stars as possible to sing their favorite TV theme songs. After all there are SO many good ones! Just try to pick your favorite. Cheers, Friends, The Jeffersons, Punky Brewster, Facts of Life, Welcome Back Kotter, New Girl, the amazing instrumental jams of The Cosby Show and Beverly Hills, 90210 — can you choose just one? The stars we talked to at the Emmys gave it their best shot and some even sang their picks because really, that’s the only way to do it. Wanna see what it looks like when Hank (Dean Norris) from Breaking Bad sings The Brady Bunch theme song? How about The Amazing Race’s Phil Keoghan singing Gilligan’s Island? Yeah, we thought so. Click on, friends.
I consider myself a veteran Honey Boo Boo Child fan, frantically cutting together this montage the morning after her amazing, hysterical, breakout Toddlers & Tiaras episode. Since then, the Go-Go-Juiced sassafrass [legal, rarely-heard name: Alana Holler], along with her coupon-cutting mamma June and daddy Sugar Bear, have scored their own reality series that infamously garnered more viewers than the RNC and has spawned catchphrases like “You Betta Redneckognize!” In light of the show’s success, Honey Boo Boo’s veering more and more into the mainstream with a recent, hilarious interview on Anderson Live and a sketch featured on SNL‘s Weekend Update, starring Vanessa Bayer and Bobby Moynihan.
Love ‘em or hate ‘em, this family isn’t going anywhere. The only natural step is a featured role for Boo Boo on one of television’s hottest Emmy-nominated shows. Right? No? Whatever, let us dream.
Show: Downton Abbey
Character Summary: Lady Mary enters the Big Sister program and is assigned to Alana, or as she will be known on the show, “Lady Boo Boo.”
Character Summary: Alana and her belly become a key element in Carrie Mathison’s case against Brody.
Kourtney and Kim Kardashian have already taken New York, and now they’re more than ready to take Miami! The reality sisters have released a poolside promo video for their upcoming spinoff, set to air this coming January. The bikini filled clip is getting us all hot and bothered, in more ways than one. There’s something sort of eerie and detached about the video, which features the voluptuous Kim diving into the deep end of a pool. Metaphor alert, anyone?
Things get weirder as she slides beneath the water and hostile voices from the upcoming season surround her. Is this a homage to Dustin Hoffman’s underwater isolation in the 1967 classic The Graduate? Is she drowning in negativity? The undertones of this simple bikini preview are surprisingly dark! Which is funny because the spinoff is set to mark the television debut of the newest Kardashian: little kitten Mercy! The sisters have been seen out and about filming for the new series while bringing the little fuzz ball along. And his cuteness is undeniable. So there you have it: crippling existential despair and kittens. It’s the Kardashian way!
When we saw pictures of Michael Cera in the set of the Bluth family model home last month, we nearly blue ourselves. Now we have even more exciting news to pass on about the new series of Arrested Development coming to Netflix next year. According to Zap2It, Bachelorette star Isla Fisher and ex-footballer/current Newsroom actor Terry Crews are reportedly joining the cast, along with the usual suspects like Jason Bateman, Will Arnett and Portia De Rossi. Their roles haven’t been announced yet, but we’re still pretty pumped. Will Terry be the Bluth family’s personal linebacker? Will Isla invite her husband Sacha Baron Cohen on the show? A guest spot by Borat would definitely be something! Or maybe the British beauty will play the lovely Rita Leed’s friend. Charlize Theron says she’d definitely be down for it, and so would we! Check out the gallery below to see what’s new with your favorite Arrested Development cast members these days.
[Photo: Getty Images]
Some sad news to pass on from the world of television. NBC has confirmed that the upcoming 9th season of The Office will be its last. Yes, we know that most of you probably stopped watching after Jim and Pam got married *belated spoiler alert* and then the rest of you probably stopped watching after Steve Carell ended his incredible run as Dunder Mifflin Regional Manger Michael Scott in 2011. But none of that matters. Nine years is a hell of a long time when scripted television is concerned, and we feel like our heart has been ripped out and placed in Jello.
NBC chairman Bob Greenblatt released a statement today praising the cast, crew and producer/original showrunner Greg Daniels. “The Office is a classic, award-winning television comedy and all of us at NBC couldn’t be prouder to have produced and telecast the series as it heads into its ninth season,” he said. “Greg Daniels, the cast, and crew have some terrific storylines planned for the final season. Fans are in for a treat. It’s always difficult to see these kinds of shows come to an end, but we are honoring the cast’s and producers’ desire to make this the final season.”
Daniels himself weighed in this afternoon at a press conference. “This year feels like the last chance to really go out together and to make an artistic ending to the show that pays off a lot of the stuff that has mattered most to fans with the core characters,” he told the assembled reporters. “This will be the last season of The Office. We’re planning a very big exciting last season.” Despite the devastating news, fans can at least get pumped for the plot details he spilled for Season 9. “We’re going to Roy’s wedding. David Wallace is running the show, the Dunder-Mifflin show. We have a lot of funny stories, we’re telling some crazy Dwight stories we’ve wanted to tell for years.”
I have never seen a full episode of The X-Files, nor could I tell you which one is Mulder and which is Scully. And yet when I heard last night’s rumor that former co-stars David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson are in luv and shacking up together, I immediately lost my mind with excitement. You don’t need to be a File-head (that’s what you call yourselves, right?) to appreciate how magical it is when co-stars on a show/film filled with UST (that’s unresolved sexual tension for you internet newbs) actually get it on.
I asked X-Files super fan and awesomely hilarious comedy writer Annie Stamell why this rumor sparked such a frenzy of excitement, and she told me: “Ask any female fan of the X-Files, and the only person they’d be okay with dating Duchovny over themselves would be Gillian Anderson.”
Sadly, Duchovny’s rep said today that there is nothing going on between the pair. To which I say: SO WHAT! I can still find these two adorable and I can still dream of a day when they fall in love IRL. Until then, I should probably watch an episode or two.
Below: 10 glorious photos of David and Gillian being absolutely precious through the years.
The last season of Breaking Bad is officially underway, and fans are already hypothesizing about how the show will end. Much of the series’ tension comes from Walter White’s DEA-employed brother-in-law Hank being hot on his meth-making trail. We asked Dean Norris, who plays the mineral-loving, nickname-giving fed, if he thinks his character will be the one to crack the Heisenberg case. Says Dean, “I think Hank’s gonna find out. That’s the last major story structure – the Walt-Hank confrontation. And they’re not going to shy away from that.”
When we asked if he thinks Hank will chose his loyalty to family over the law, Dean said: “I don’t know, that’s up to [show creator] Vince Gilligan. I have a feeling he’s going to struggle with it and then take him down.”
And that’s when we let out a fangirl-y scream, because if there’s one thing we’re looking forward to, it’s Hank and Walt going at it in the ultimate, Breaking Bad showdown! Oh, this show. THIS SHOW!
More Breaking Bad coverage from Comic-Con:
Aaron Paul on Jesse Pinkman’s Possible Demise: “I Hope He Goes Out With Guns Blazing”
Is Walter White A Hero Or A Villain? Bryan Cranston Answers!
I interviewed the cast of Game of Thrones high atop the WB booth in the middle of the main Comic-Com exhibit hall on Friday afternoon. Many had just come from the first few weeks of shooting season three, and we did our best to dig up a few tidbits about what the future holds for our favorite wannabe kings and queens.
Emilia Clark plays Daenerys Targaryen, widow of Khal Drogo and Mother of Dragons (if you haven’t watched the show or read the books, stop reading this post and get to work), who spent season two wandering the desert dealing with deserters, dragons and creepy dudes in the city of Qarth. We asked the actress if her character might get back in the saddle and give the ol’ romance thing a try again. “There’s a few interesting journeys that she goes on” said Emelia, “and there’s a lot of new stuff that goes on for her. I can’t talk about and all I want to do is talk about!”
Not only is her character popular, but “khaleesi” has become a much-used pet name amongst couples. Emilia offered up her thoughts on why so many people connect with Daenerys. “I think she’s a character that lots of people and women can relate to,” she said. “The way they’ve written her you really can care for her because you can see her vulnerability.”
[Photo: Getty Images]
Related: Richard Madden Talks “Gratuitous” Game Of Thrones Sex, Says Rob Stark’s Love Scenes Are Not Just About “T And A”
Vampire Diaries Alum Matt Davis Mixes Old “Family” With New At Comic-Con
Devils, Queens, Drug Dealers And Cults: An Inspiring Day 2 At Comic-Con