Television

August 4th, 2008 | 4:03 pm by Kate Spencer (@katespencer)

Kids Dress Like Adults At Teen Choice Awards

The teen clones were out in full force last night at the Teen Choice Awards, contorting their legs into weird poses and grabbing at their hips to see just how damn bony they really are. Also, peace is in this year!

Unfortunately, our celebrity kiddie pool wasted this opportunity to dress like the reckless, rebellious, fad-loving followers that they are and instead went for a look way beyond their years. Cute mini-dresses were in, Paris Hilton skank suits of yesteryear were sadly out. Also, Gossip Girls star Ed Westwick wore a man scarf. Nothing says Teen Choice like choosing to dress like a newly divorced 35-year old mom desperate to meet some hot arse at her local ladies night. We’re talking about you, Ed.

August 4th, 2008 | 3:13 pm by Kate Spencer (@katespencer)

Medical Report: Morgan Freeman Hospitalized, Christina’s Cancer, Bernie Battling Pneumonia

They may make millions, but celebrities still suffer health scares just like everyone else. Here’s the latest Hollywood hospital visits on our radar:

1. Morgan Freeman is in serious condition after a car accident in Mississippi on Sunday in which his vehicle flipped and jaws of life had to be used to remove him. He’s currently being treated for a broken arm and a broken shoulder.

2. Christina Applegate has breast cancer, but it’s totally treatable and in the early stages. Her mom is also a breast cancer suvivor, and we trust that Kelly Bundy can kick that cancer’s ass.

3. Contrary to rumors alleging his death, Bernie Mac is indeed alive! However he’s “being treated in a Chicago hospital for pneumonia and is expected to make a full recovery,” says his rep. Stop your mourning already, people!

August 4th, 2008 | 10:08 am by Kate Spencer (@katespencer)

The Best D-Lister Beat Down Ever

Hairspray actress Nikki Blonsky and America’s Next Top Model reject Bianca Golden got into a serious fist fight this weekend, over a couple of seats at a Turks Caicos airport that the Blonskys had covered with their luggage. An all out brawl ensued, and Bianca’s mom landed in intensive care after she “alleged to have been repeatedly kicked and punched all over her body.” Nikki and her father were arrested, and Mr. B remains in jail, on charges of grievous bodily harm. Somehow chance brought the two “stars” together for the sole purpose of beating the sh*t out of each other and possibly ruining each other’s lives forever. All over a few chairs.

In addition to the beat down, Bianca’s family is accusing the Blonskys of dropping some racial slurs and N-bombs after they were asked by the Goldens to move their luggage from the chairs. Nikki’s been spotted in a neck brace, while her dad is still stuck behind bars, hoping someone can spot him the $75,000 to post bail. He even faces an eight year prison sentence, which might teach him not to f*ck with anyone who identifies herself as fierce. Bianca may smile with her eyes, but she fights with her fists! [NYPost]

August 1st, 2008 | 3:55 pm by Kate Spencer (@katespencer)

Tila Snags Lohan’s Ex-Gal, Yahoo! Heir Courtenay Semel

Courtney Semel isn’t a household name (not even after appearing on Filthy Rich: Cattle Drive on E!), but she should be. She’s rumored to have gotten it on with Lindsay Lohan, and up until recently was dating Johnson & Johnson heir Casey Johnson. Semel’s an heir of sorts herself – her dad Terry was the CEO of Yahoo! But it looks like her most recent relationship has ended after a fling this week with Tila Tequila – and we’ve got the pics to prove it! Check ‘em out below – seems like they pair were caught getting a little flirty, huh!?

A source tells Scandalist exclusively that Semel is a notorious playgirl – she even supposedly stole an LA guy’s girlfriend away from him a few years ago. Yahoo! [NYPost]

[Images: Getty]

July 30th, 2008 | 3:52 pm by Kate Spencer (@katespencer)

Gossip Break: Seezinz’ Skinz

Flavor of Love 3‘s Seezinz follows the lead of other FOL greats and shows us some skin. Thanks. [Bossip]

Amy Winehouse‘s dad is in denial, and thinks a “friend” spiked his daughter’s drink with the drug ecstasy. And the friend’s name rhymes with Mamy Minemouse. [DListed]

Yes, we are made of stone, but even we cracked at the cuteness of Matthew McConaughey and his baby. [Seriously? OMG!]

These Gossip Girl guys might be getting all LoRonSon on each other. Or maybe we all just wish they were. [WWTDD]

Hef‘s girlfriends look really…plastic. Still. [ONTD]

July 30th, 2008 | 1:26 pm by Kate Spencer (@katespencer)

Ali Lohan Meets With Porn Director, Mommy Gets Pissed

On last week’s episode of Living Lohan (a.k.a 101 Reasons Not to Let Your Kid Go Into Showbiz), the show’s tortured starlet, Ali Lohan, was seen auditioning for a horror flick in front of two old dude producers. Turns out our pals at TMZ have identified one of the men as Peter Davy, whose past work includes the tragic tale “Bun Busters 12″ and the uplifting “Breast Wishes 14.” Yep, Peter’s a porn producer.

The meeting was set up by Ali’s agent (nice one!) and Dina, of course, freaked the f*ck out. But doesn’t it pretty much sum up the future of Ali’s career? She should just get used to meeting with porn directors now, because that’s what she’ll be doing for the rest of her life – especially if her Mom’s management skills have anything to do with it. Until then, we’re waiting with baited breath for the first installment in the Loving Lohan series.

July 29th, 2008 | 12:31 pm by Kate Spencer (@katespencer)

Heidi Thinks She Can Afford A $15 Million House


Whoever said The Hills wasn’t funny?

Heidi Montag is moving out of Hollywood (yay!) to escape “the drama.” Sadly, she hasn’t yet realized she’s normally the one to cause all the cat-fighting. But you know, it’s hard being that self-absorbed. Heidi and her man-beast Spencer Pratt are searching for a house in the $15 million range, which means they’re gonna have to stage a lot of bikini pics to save up! That or sell 15 million crappy tank tops from her junk fashion line. Either way, it will probably take them a few years – they’ve blown all their cash on lip injections, after all.

Heidi knows her price range is “a little bit expensive,” but says “we want to get one house where we want to stay and build a family in.” Just the thought of these two “building” some babies makes us vomit harder than Shia LeBeouf after a night of binge drinking. Eek.

July 28th, 2008 | 4:03 pm by Kate Spencer (@katespencer)

Gossip Break: Miley’s Makeout Session

New Miley Cyrus candid kissing pics: now with 10% more slutiness! [ONTD]

John Mayer‘s O face is way less sexy with his new haircut (sorry Jeniston). [DListed]

Jerry O’Connell and Rebecca Romjin are adding to their cuteness with twin babies. [Seriously? OMG!]

Ryan Seacrest was bitten by a shark while swimming. In other news, I love sharks. [ICYDK]

Rihanna and Chris Brown go jet skiing in Maryland. Yeah, we don’t care either. [Bossip]

Lindsay Lohan was not hit by a motorcycle, no matter what her crazy dad says. [PopSugar]

July 28th, 2008 | 12:53 pm by Kate Spencer (@katespencer)

Lauren Conrad Not Tortured By Her Own Vapidity

It’s such a relief to know that Lauren Conrad is not a “tortured soul.” Apparently we’re the only ones tormented by her mascara-stained tear fests and alleged 8 hour work days spent in 6 inch Louboutin heels. Hell, we’re surprised Lauren has a soul at all – we thought she sold it to get that pathetic fashion line. More LCisms coming at you on August 5th in CosmoGirl. [via FadedYouth]