We’re back again, folks! Earlier today we brought you the breakdown for the actors nominated for the 2013 Academy Awards, and now we’ve returned to do the same thing for the actresses! There are so many incredibly talented ladies up for the award this year, it’s hard to know who to place your bets on for your inevitable Oscar Betting Pool. So we’ve tried to make it a little easier for you and “handicapped” each of the actresses to help you make your picks!
Jessica Chastain: Maya in Zero Dark Thirty
Why She Has A Good Shot: Chastain provided a strong emotional anchor amid the violence, terrorism and controversy in a film that chronicles the search for Osama Bin Laden.
What Might Get In Her Way: Geez, we heard that the Academy tends to respect dramas over comedies, but this sounds a little intense.
Jennifer Lawrence: Tiffany Maxwell in Silver Linings Playbook
Why She Has A Good Shot: Sure it’s a great movie and an awesome performance, but in our minds this is a nomination for blowing box offices sky-high with Hunger Games.
What Might Get In Her Way: President Snow.
The nominations for the 2013 Oscars were announced bright and early this morning, and that brings with it another time-honored tradition: The Oscar betting pool! It’s the time of the year when suddenly everyone is a regular Siskel and Ebert, passionately weighing in on a bunch of films that we (probably) haven’t seen, guessing who’s going to take home the little gold bald dude. Normally we just bet on the thespian who has won the most accolades in the past, but this year it gets a little more tricky: ALL of the Best Supporting Actors have won Oscars before! The track record is fairly similar in the Best Leading Actor category too, with Academy honored legends like Daniel Day-Lewis, Denzel Washington and Joaquin Phoenix going head to head. Ahh, clash of the Titans! What are we going to do!?
Well, never fear, folks, because we’ve taken the time to handicap all of the actors for you, in basically the least-expert way possible. We went through their cinematic performances broken down into all the pros and cons that you need to make an informed decision for your Oscar night scorecard. Don’t worry, we’ve got one for the actresses too! Read on…
Daniel Day-Lewis: Abraham Lincoln in Lincoln
Why He Has A Good Shot: Not only did the master craftsman give the performance of his career by bringing back the controversial president, but he also grew his own beard, you guys.
What Might Hold Him Back: The Academy forgets that his last name has a hyphen, accidentally awards an Oscar to a “Daniel Day Lewis.”
Bradley Cooper: Pat Solitano in Silver Linings Playbook
Why He Has A Good Shot: Brad really showed that he was much more than a pretty face/funny guy in David O. Russell’s alt- dramedy.
What Might Hold Him Back: People are still pissed at him for beating out Ryan Gosling as People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive back in 2011.
There’s a reason we’re bloggers and not rocket scientists or statisticians here — numbers ain’t our strong suit — but for the greater good, we decided to do a little counting, just to see where this year’s great movies stand so far in the Awards Season 2013 race. From the Gotham Awards to the National Review Board, the Spirit Awards to the Critics’ Choice — which was just announced today — we are keeping score now. And this is all leading up to Thursday’s Golden Globes nominations announcement.
This early in the game, with no different weight given to the different types of boards awarding nominations and kudos (or the different awards, be they for costume design or best feature), this is where the movies stand:
Silver Linings Playbook: 29
Les Miserables: 23
The Master: 21
Zero Dark Thirty: 19
Beasts of the Southern Wild: 17
Moonrise Kingdom: 16
Life of Pi: 14
The Sessions: 10
Django Unchained: 6
If nothing else, this should give you a good idea of which movies you need to add to your list before January!
[Photos: Universal Pictures, Twentieth Century Fox, The Weinstein Company, Warner Bros.]
Oh Joaquin Phoenix, you sound just like us during a fight. “You know what? You’re right. I suck. I suck so much, nothing I do or say matters and now you have to feel bad for me.” Yeah, we are the worst to fight with, which is why we’re doubly glad it’s Joaquin and not us that had to make a statement regarding the hilariously negative comments he mad about the Oscars last month. “I’m just saying that I think it’s bulls—. I think it’s total, utter bulls—, and I don’t want to be a part of it,” The Master star scoffed in Interview. His publicist must have had a stroke after the interview was published, because now Joaquin is attempted to walk back his statements via the Sydney Morning Herald. ”But I know that first of all, I wouldn’t have the career that I have if it weren’t for the Oscars. I haven’t been in a lot of movies that have made a lot of money,” he admitted. “And getting nominated for a movie has probably helped my career tremendously.” So would the Oscars please start replying to his texts already?
Joaquin also sighs, “I guess I sound like a dick,” which is just delightful. “But in some ways it’s the antithesis of what you want to be as an actor,” he says of awards season. “You’re always trying to free yourself of the artifice, which is really difficult. Especially when you suck, like me.” Oh jeez, Joaquin. Save the self-deprecation for your mama. You are no Jennifer Lawrence and you never will be!
[Photo: Getty Images]
Once you get nominated for an Academy Award, it stands to reason you might get nominated again. You’ll probably get offered bigger or better roles that might pop up on the Academy’s radar, or they’ll give you a statue for a role that wasn’t even particularly memorable. (Sandy Bullock in The Blind Side? She just has a Southern accent! That’s it!). All of which must be suuuuuch a hassle when you’re Joaquin Phoenix. “I’m just saying that I think it’s bulls—. I think it’s total, utter bulls—, and I don’t want to be a part of it,” Phoenix told Interview when asked about going up for an award. “I don’t believe in it. It’s a carrot, but it’s the worst-tasting carrot I’ve ever tasted in my whole life. I don’t want this carrot.” Remember this quote now, guys! It’s going to be everywhere when Joaquin inevitably wins Best Actor for this year’s The Master.
Now, our only experience with rotten carrots is the bag we buy from Trader Joe’s and forget about every week, but maybe Joaquin is still peeved he didn’t win for Gladiator? Says Phoenix, “It was one of the most uncomfortable periods of my life when Walk the Line was going through all the awards stuff and all that. I never want to have that experience again. I don’t know how to explain it—and it’s not like I’m in this place where I think I’m just above it — but I just don’t ever want to get comfortable with that part of things.” And that perspective is what makes him an actor and that skill is what’s going to snag him an Oscar. It’s a Catch-22, Joaquin! That, and the scene where he smashes the toilet in the jail cell. So good!
[Photo: Getty Images]