The Twilight Saga

by (@katespencer)

Robert Pattinson Calls Courtney Love A “Dick,” World Agrees With Him


See you guys? We told you Robert Pattinson (photos) was a genius!!! Well maybe we never said those words exactly, but it’s not too late to heap praise at his delicate, pale, pigeon-toed feet. The awkward heartthrob has called out America’s #1 crazy, Courtney Love (see her craziest looks), for being totally batsh*t bonkers when she freaked out over the rumor that Rob might play Kurt Cobain in a biopic about the singer’s short life…a rumor that Rob recently dispelled in an interview with The Mirror. Oh and while he was calling bullsh*it, he also called Courtney a “dick.” Do you guys get why we love him yet?

Says his dazzlingness:

“Sometimes these things just appear. I love Nirvana, but I love them a bit too much – I’d be embarrassed. And you see all these comments, like from Courtney Love, saying ‘What the f*ck! He’s totally wrong for it’, and I’m like, ’I f*cking said no, you dick!’ I didn’t get offered it. For one thing, I’m too tall, and I can’t sing like him, I’m nothing like him!’ It’s ridiculous.”

And here we were thinking there was nothing sexier than Rob running around in karate pants. We were wrong – dead wrong – it’s his mouth and not his looks that have made us melt. If he calls Courtney a “dick” in an interview, we can only imagine what he calls Kristen Stewart (photos) in the bedroom. Not that we’re imagining that right now or anything.

[Photos: GettyImages]


Brad Pitt Beats RPattz In Sexy Vampire Poll. Really?

In a recent poll, Brad Pitt beat Robert Pattinson by a one percent margin to win the title of Hottest Hollywood Vampire. We’re confused. Pitt’s portrayal of Louis, sired by Tom Cruise’s vampire Lestat in Interview With The Vampire is, in our opinion, pretty hilarious (although Edward Cullen climbing trees and running through the forest at top speed is unsexy in it’s own way, BUT STILL, that’s easily overlooked with rosy lips like his).

We  think Pattinson should have won this one hand’s down because Pitt is just so 90’s in that film (to say nothing of RPattz’s broody hotness in the Twilight films). Some of the other contenders were Kiefer Sutherland in The Lost Boys, Gary Oldman in Dracula and Wesley Snipes in Blade. Are the results of this poll skewed, or do you vamp loyalists out there agree that Brad’s 19th century character is sexier than our current-day Cullen? (And what of Tom Cruise? We guess his Lestat was just too campy for this poll).  Let us know who you think the real winner should be in our poll below.

[Photos: Summit Entertainment/]

by (@katespencer)

Two Friends Go On A Friend Date And Go Home Together As Friends


Hey look what we have here! Two regular old pals, Robert Pattinson (photos) and Kristen Stewart (photos) being all platonic together at pal Sam Bradley‘s concert last night in Los Angeles. Because this is the kind of stuff friends – friends who hold hands and eye-sex each other and share clothes and bags and hats and wear matching bracelets – do together. Friends bein’ friends – and nothing more!

In fact, just last night we turned to our British guy friend – with whom we spend every waking moment with but are just friends – and were all, “Hey, here’s a bracelet that matches the one I’m wearing. Put it on. Now let’s go out in public together 24/7 looking awkward, and once in a while we’ll secretly hold hands. And while we’re at it, can I wear your ripped t-shirt and your sunglasses? You know, ‘cuz we’re just friends?”

And he was all, “Totes! We’re friends who do not desire each other sexually and do not share hotel rooms and do not secretly live together in a tiny love nest and do not feed each other loquat pies, of course we can do that!”

Then we high-fived and did not let our fingertips linger because we are strictly buddies. Just like Rob and Kristen.

This post brought to you by our generous sponsor: Sarcasm.

View Photo Gallery

[Photo: Splash News Online]


50 Photos of Terrifying Twilight Fans

scariest-twilight-fan-200xTwilight: Eclipse is a summer blockbuster. The movie about vampires, wolves and virgins tallies up an impressive 175 million f**king dollars (?!) in merely 6 days since its release. Twitanic indeed. To celebrate this movie’s unbelievable success and the people that made it all possible, we bring you 50 Photos of Terrifying Twilight Fans. Get your Michael Jackson Thriller contacts on and enjoy.

View all 50 photos at

by (@katespencer)

Xavier Samuel Flaunts Girlfriend, Creates River of Twilight Tears


If you’ve seen Eclipse then you know that the Twilight gods dropped a new piece of vamp ass in the laps of Twi-hards, causing them (er, us?) to froth at the mouth. Xavier Samuel plays the blood-thirst Riley (RIP sweet newborn), and he’s Australian, boyishly handsome and generally beefier than Robert Pattinson (photos) but without Taylor Lautner‘s Jersey Shore-esque muscles. In other words, perfs.

With Rob off eating Kristen Stewart‘s (photos) loquat pies and Taylor making out with a picture of his own abs, we thought our chances of landing a Twilight boyfriend were long gone. But with Xavier, hope blossomed in our delusional heart and we knew it would not be long before we were walking red carpets in Marchesa gowns as his better half. Until, that is, we were confronted with these pictures of him and his girlfriend strolling hand in hand in New York City.

You can imagine the kind of scribbling that went down in our journal last night. We wept, we mourned, we blasted Lykke Li‘s “Possibility” on repeat and destroyed our Xavier Samuel shrine while shoving Edy’s Cookies n’ Cream ice cream in our mouth. But then we came across these pics of Xavier and our new enemy hand in hand this weekend and glanced down at his atrocious man sandals and felt a little better about letting go. Rob may be taken, but at least we know we’ll never have to see his pasty white toes pressed up against tight leather anytime soon. And that makes it all okay.

View Photo Gallery

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@missmuttoo)

Robsten Confirmed? They’re A Couple!


We KNEW it. Well, everyone knew it, but HAH. Robsten(photos) are real! Bring out the tissues, get some ice-cream, keep all breakables away, get a new haircut or buy some new shoes… whatever you need to do to deal with the heartbreak. Eclipse producer Wyck Godfrey has pretty much outed Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson as a couple in an interview with Time. No more acting coy! Months of speculation have come down to this!

He was flat-out asked what he thought about their down-low relationship and responded, “The thing I do think about is, Oh my God, I hope they stay together. Because it could be awkward on set in the next movie if they have a huge falling out. It’s like, Wow, they have to portray this love story through two more movies. God, I hope they stay together; please stay together. That’s what affects my day-to-day.”

Did you read that? Right there… they’re real! They exist!

And that’s not all he gabbed about. When the interviewer asked him about the intense media coverage on them, he commented, “I don’t feel it’s out there anymore. Do people still report on it? If you look at people who have a stable personal life, the rags get tired of them. I think we’re heading to that place where they are together and that’s their life and we better find someone new to create drama out of.”

Awww, they sound cozy. Bella and Edward for real!  Now somebody hand us a tissue.

View Photo Gallery

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@missmuttoo)

Kristen Stewart’s New ‘Do: Love It Or Meh?

Do we love this? Do we? Do we? Kristen Stewart(photos) debuted this new look at a taping for the Late Show with David Letterman in New York City.  Apparently, Kristen’s new hair is for her role as MaryLou in a screen adaptation of Jack Kerouac‘s iconic novel On the Road.

Those are the facts, but they don’t help us in deciding what we think of it. It’s short, wavy, soft and strawberry-blondish. Or a light brown-tad-of-red? Or… light brown with hints of blond? GAH…we can’t even decide on a color. We’re so used to seeing our KStew rocking jet-black because she’s our fave goth-ish rockstar. But at the same time, her skin is flawless and her make-up is aces. And she’s still the same person underneath the follicles. So yes… it’s growing on us already. What say you? Comments away!

[Photo: Splash News Online]

View Photo Gallery

by (@katespencer)

Our 11 Most Epic Moments From The Eclipse Red Carpet

You guys. YOU GUYSSSSSS! The Eclipse premiere is officially over, and we’re soothing our broken heart with some In N’ Out as we sit here reflecting on the night that was. Before we recap our 11 Most Epic Moments From The Eclipse Red Carpet, let us set the stage for you. We got to the Nokia Theater at 2PM, up-do secured on our head with 108 bobby pins, decked out in a wrinkled Old Navy dress and Haviana flip flops. We never did switch into our heels, because it wouldn’t be fair to dwarf Taylor Lautner on his big day (nor would it be fair to our feet).

We hung out at press check in with the lovely gals from Twilightish and Team Twilight until we finally made it to our spot on the red carpet, directly across from a group of Wolf Pack lovers who howled every time anyone wolf-related was mentioned. It got old fast but you know, they camped out for 4 days to earn the right to howl at the Eclipse premiere…more power to them. We were hoping one of them would imprint on us, but alas – they were saving themselves for BooBoo Stewart.

From that moment on, the red carpet only got wilder, weirder and more wonderfully insane. Behold our 11 Most Epic Moments From The Eclipse Red Carpet. Every single one of these things is true – we’ve got the video above as proof. Awkward, awkward proof.

11. Meeting the world’s horniest Twilight fans. We get it. They’re hot. Yes, we want to spoon with Robert Pattinson while catching up on Modern Family too. But we met some of the most x-rated Twi-fans in the world on the red carpet, with the signage to prove it. We chatted with one girl who referenced Rob and her “itching ovaries” and another who wanted to do illegal things to Kellan Lutz that involved whips and whipped cream. We’re not saying Twilight fans need to get laid (we think they got that covered),  just that we’re jealous of they people they’re doing it with because you know there are feathers and broken beds involved.

Read more…

by (@katespencer)

Eclipse Cast Predicts Next Big Sexy Monster Trend

We polled the experts – the Eclipse cast and a few of their close personal red carpet pals – about what they think the next big sexy, supernatural-y monster trend is going to be and we’ve got their ridiculous (and ridiculously adorable) answers above. Yes, we hate to even imagine a world without Edward Cullen, but we also can’t deny the truth – vampires and werewolves have almost jumped the shark. By the time Breaking Dawn Part 2 rolls around in 2012 Taylor Lautner will be dating Miley Cyrus, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart will have a couple of kids and Peter Facinelli will be President. They’ll be over slicing their eyes up with red contact lenses and bathing in white make up and we’ll be forced to move on. Can someone pass us our box of Twilight-themed tissues? We, uh, have something in our eye. Okay, both eyes. Fine! They’re tears.

Face it, Twi-hards – all vampy things must come to an end…except eternal life. Check out the cast’s predictions – and our ridiculous red carpet hairdo – above.