Jon Hamm has the velvety, masculine voice of an angel formed out of cigar smoke and brandy vapor, but that doesn’t mean he can just use it to talk crazy whenever he wants! For example, when claiming that he just doesn’t measure up to fellow A-listers in the “Hot Face” department. “I don’t necessarily think of myself like the handsome guy. That’s reserved for Brad Pitt and Ryan Reynolds and those guys,” Hamm scoffed to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. “I guess I never really thought of myself that way. I just wanted to be a regular person and try to portray parts as varied as I could.” A regular person! Do you hear yourself right now, Don Draper? Did an alien seize control of your vocal chords this weekend? A regular person. Please.
Less crazy-making, but more groan-inducing, is Hamm’s continuing comments about his beef with Kim Kardashian. Jon, let it go! We all agreed with you the first time around! “I don’t think they were careless; I think they were accurate,” the Friends With Kids actor proclaimed on the Today show this morning in a direct rebuttal to Kardashian’s annoyed tweets. “It’s a part of our culture that I certainly don’t identify with, and I don’t really understand the appeal of it other than in a sort of car crash sensibility, and it’s not something that I partake in or enjoy, but it is what it is, and here we are.” Between this and the Ryan Reynolds comment, Jon, we might have to watch the new season of Mad Men with the sound-off. Sure, sometimes we do that anyway, but you get our point!
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Oh, Miley Cyrus. Naughty, naughty Miley Cyrus. Let’s hope she has the bouquet ordered and the apology card written seeing as how the Punk’d promo featuring her man friend Liam Hemsworth has hit the internet. “Oh, my God, babe — there are two naked people in my car right now,” Cyrus gasps as two scantily-clad individuals scamper into her SUV. The Hunger Games star makes a valiant effort to chase them out of his lady’s vehicle, but there is only so much you can do without, you know, having to touch a naked stranger. They probably taped this episode months ago so Miley might have already said she’s sorry, but seeing as how the world at large is only seeing it today…better go ahead and make dinner reservations at Liam’s favorite restaurant just to be safe, girl. Oh, and get your upholstery cleaned, if you haven’t already.
Rihanna knows Twitter is mightier than the sword. Plus, if she’d used some sort of katana blade to take on Dutch magazine Jackie, we would have missed out on everything but the police report! After the mag published an article describing the “You Da One” singer as a “n—-b—h” (which, we cannot even), RiRi snapped them back to reality. “I hope u can read english, because your magazine is a poor representation of the evolution of human rights! I find you disrespectful, and rather desperate!!,” the singer tweeted at the mag’s editor Eva Hoeke. “You ran out of legit, civilized information to print! There are 1000’s of Dutch girls who would love to be recognized for their contributions to your country, you could have given them an article. Instead, u paid to print one degrading an entire race!”
As if that wasn’t bad enough (and it was) the article also managed to misidentify Rihanna‘s home country as Jamaica rather than Barbados. Hoeke has since issued an apology for the article, explaining in part, “We make our magazine with love, energy and enthusiasm, and it can sometimes happen that someone is out of line. And then you can only do one thing: apologize. And hope that others wish to accept it. From the bottom of my heart I say it again: we never intended to offend anyone. And I mean that.” Hmm, seems like a pretty half-hearted apology to us. Concluded Rihanna, “Well with all respect, on behalf of my race, here are my two words for youâ€¦F— YOU!!!” Yup, we’re going to have to go with RiRi on this one.
The silence from Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher is deafening. When reports of Ashton’s alleged infidelity surfaced last September, the couple immediately fired off an angry denial. But now the Kutchers are keeping mum about their private affairs, and it’s only adding fuel to the divorce rumor fire. Facts are few, however we do know that Ashton spent September 24th -his sixth wedding anniversary- partying in Vegas til the break of dawn, while Demi was in New York promoting a film. Unfortunate coincidence? Poor planning? We’re not sure. But Ashton did post a Spotify link to his twitter this morning that plays the Public Enemy song “Don’t Believe The Hype.” Should we take Chuck D’s advice?
Yet the Twitter Shakespearean drama continues to unfold, as Demi tweets cryptic and pointed messages that seem to hint a trouble in the marriage. “When we are offended at any man’s fault, turn to yourself & study your own failings. Then you will forget your anger. — Epictetus,” she wrote last Friday. Really high-brow burn? Then on the 26th the actress posted “I see through you,” with a kinda creepy picture of herself, lying solo on the bed with her eyes closed. Way to bring back Emo, Demi! None of this is very direct, but clearly Ashton’s in the doghouse for something. Maybe she’s just pissed that he went to Vegas on their anniversary, instead of accompanying her to New York?
[Photo: Getty Images]