Zombies have been a staple of the horror genre for nearly 70 years. And it’s no surprise that the creatures have evolved over time. But no matter what, there are two characteristics that mark a zombie: intelligence (or lack thereof) and speed. In fact, it was George A. Romero who set the standard that most people know today. Zombies in Night Of The Living Dead were sluggish and had little brain power except for the need for flesh. Eventually, zombies developed attack skills, motor functions, self-awareness and in Warm Bodies case, true emotion.
Then there’s speed. I Walked With A Zombie was all but human, just dazed. Then films like 28 Days Later and Zombieland pressed on the gas peddle. World War Z marks another significant step in the zombie evolution. The speed of this film’s creatures are probably the fastest in pop culture (unless you count the quick steps of Michael Jackson‘s “Thriller”). Surprisingly, they lack any real intelligence, just a frighteningly intense desire for flesh.
CLICK HERE FOR A MATRIX OF ZOMBIES IN POP CULTURE. (Or click image for Hi-Res.)
So, we’re a little bit obsessed with Halloween here at VH1 headquarters. (One glance at Best Week Ever should prove that much.) And since I finished my costume a week early this year, I have extra time to enjoy how much every other TV network in the country is also obsessed with the holiday. From vampires and witches to fairy tales and murderers, it’s as good a time to stay indoors as it is to go bobbing for apples — that’s what the kids do these days, right?
Monday: Martha Stewart’s Haunted House
8 p.m. Hallmark
Martha doesn’t do anything halfway, but Halloween has always been an excuse for her to go extra craft-crazy. Tonight, she’s teaching you how to create a haunted house and has Justin Long, one of the least-scary actors on the planet, do something to spook small children. My glue gun is ready!
Tuesday: Zombies: A Living History
8 p.m., History Channel
Lots of historical experts scare the sh– out of me with their talk of how the zombie virus could actually come to be, while actors moan and shuffle in the background. Watch the trailer here and you’ll see why I may stay indoors forever.
Wednesday: American Horror Story
10 p.m., FX
As anyone who’s ever watched anything before knows, Halloween is the night when the barrier between the living and the dead is thinnest. That’s got to make living in a haunted house extra fun! What’s even more fun/super creepy? Having Zachary Quinto as your interior decorator.
We all know the Hanson brothers are doing their part to fill the world with beautiful music while populating it with beautiful people (they’ve got eight kids between them, so far). But when the guys stopped by Big Morning Buzz Live to chat about their ongoing tour, we asked them the question on about 7.3 million (sleep-deprived) Walking Dead fans’ minds: Are Hanson prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse?
“If the Zombie Apocalypse comes, you want to be with Hanson,” Taylor, 28, answered with confidence.
“For one, we live in Oklahoma, so …,” Isaac, 31, reasoned, as Taylor completed the thought, “We own weapons.”
“We live on enough land that there probably aren’t going to be that many walkers, at least for a while, around the house, which is good, ” explained baby bro Zac, who turns 26 on Saturday.