She kissed a girl and she liked it, she kissed Russell Brand and she liked that, and now she’s kissing John Mayer and she seems to like that too! Yes, Katy Perry has a way of oozing seduction. That sounds like a euphemism for “hot as hell,” but it’s really not. It’s something more. It’s as if she has a way of putting moves on literally anyone (or sometimes anything) that crosses her path. It’s a gift! In honor of her 28th birthday, we’re going to take a look at 28 photos that prove she is trying to seduce the whole world. Yup, all of it. Trust us, the evidence is pretty convincing. And if she hasn’t reached her goal yet, she probably will soon with photos as hot as these!
1. Offers To Be One Direction Heartthrob Niall Horan’s “Mrs. Robinson”
”Ms. Perry, you’re trying to seduce me.” Not just you, Niall. The entire world.
[Photo: Getty Images]
On-again couple Katy Perry and John Mayer were spotted out and about in New York yesterday having lunch and dinner to celebrate Mayer’s 35th birthday. It seems like a happy enough occasion, and it was an absolutely gorgeous fall day in the city. So why were the pop and rock stars frowning in every single picture taken of them?
- John’s feeling over the hill at 35. (I get that; I’m turning 35 this month too.)
- His attempt to feel younger by pairing that jaunty bow-tie with a denim jacket — a style that looks cute on 20-something prepsters — kinda backfired.
- Katy read our list of John’s 10 most insane quotes yesterday. She had somehow previously sheltered herself from his foot-in-mouth disease. Then they got into a fight about how at least Russell Brand is funny when he offends people.
- The paparazzi said something mean about the bow tie. Read more…
“My mouth is the Don King of my penis,” John Mayer once wrote on Twitter. We don’t totally know what it means, but it sounds vulgar and gives our brain the bad touch. And that, dear friends, is the general sensation we get when reading John Mayer quotes! They’re so confounding, we bet they even make Charlie Sheen scratch his head in bewilderment. Whether he’s describing his past sexual conquests, what it means to be a man, or even what it is that makes him so damn popular, Johnny has found ways of pissing people off left and right with his loose lips. Everyone remembers his infamous 2010 Rolling Stone profile, but the guitar hero has had a way with words much longer than that. He has since apologized for “those dumb interviews,”…but not for breaking Taylor Swift’s heart. John turns 35 years old today, and he’s been reasonably well behaved lately. With age comes wisdom, ehh? Or maybe he’s just hired a publicist. But in honor of his big day, let’s look back at a few of our personal favorite John Mayer quotes. Enjoy!
[Photo: Getty Images]
It’s no surprise to us that Taylor Swift covers the November “Hair Issue” of Glamour. We’d probably kill for her luscious blond waves, if such a deal could be made. Still, the singer looks surprised in the photo — though this time it’s not, her “Gosh! You picked me?” surprise face, it’s more, “Oh, you caught me! It’s a good thing I had my hair all done and this pretty gold dress on.” In all seriousness, she looks as awesome as ever — with her fave red lipstick matching her nails, belt and a random swath of tulle — and we want lessons in how to apply blush so perfectly. We also want lessons in playing coy the way she did with the interviewer.
When the Glamour writer brought up “Dear John” and her ex-boyfriend John Mayer’s comment to Rolling Stone that it was about him, she responded, “How presumptuous! I never disclose who my songs are about.” And apparently, she managed to shield herself from anything Mayer said to RS about feeling “humiliated” by the song. “No! I don’t want to know, I don’t want to know,” she said as his quote was about to be read to her. I know it wasn’t good, so I don’t want to know. I put a high priority on staying happy, and I know what I can’t handle. … It’s not that I’m this egomaniac and I don’t want to hear anything negative, because I do keep myself in check. But I’ve never developed that thick a skin.” Read more…
Ugh, Katy Perry and John Mayer, you know how to play us like a fiddle. Clearly you want us to know/think your love is continuing to blossom despite rumors of your break-up, as evidenced by your date at Little Door last night. How do we know your romantic evening was at least partially for our benefit? Luckily for you, we’re something of a celeb dating detective agency. We’re like Sherlock Holmes, but for secret A-list canoodling. We also rock a fierce deerstalker from time to time. Those never go out of style.
People’s Exhibit A: If John and Katy weren’t interested in letting any of us plebs know the details of their dating life, they would have done what all normal couples do: order in Chinese and watch Creep Show 2 on Netflix. In private. No paps would mean none of us normals would be the wiser, so it seems pretty obvious they wanted to be photographed together.
So much for summer lovin’. Katy Perry and John Mayer have already head towards splitsville, after just a couple of months (or is it weeks) of dating each other. What’s that we hear? Oh yeah … a swan song. When Us Weekly picked up on the story of Katy and John getting cozy at Soho House, it was around the last week of July. Which means they had been getting cozy for sometime before that. There’ve been lots of reports and photographs of them walking the road to coupledom after that, but it’s suddenly all come to a crashing halt. And we were just getting used to the idea of them being together. What can we say — life can be unfair. Of their split, a source has told People, ”They’ll end up as friends. They were honestly having fun. People made it out to be far more than it was.” But a report in UsMagazine is contradicting this amiable spin. A source is claiming that Katy’s actually taking their breakup not well, at all, saying, “She’s really upset about it,” with another source adding, “She is making it seem like it wasn’t serious with John, but she is hurt.” When the two got together another insider had revealed, “She doesn’t want to get her heart broken again, but she feels a real connection and wants to see where things go.” So what’s the real story here? Was it more serious than met the eye. If so, we’re sending out hugs and various tubs of ice-cream to Katy.
[Photo: Splash News Online]
Related: This Katy Perry, John Mayer Thing Is Actually Happening; We Kind Of Get It
It’s one of the greatest mysteries since contemplating the beginning of the universe: Who is Taylor Swift “never ever, ever getting back together” with in her new song, “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”? It’s all we can think about since she announced the release of Red in an online chat with her fans last night. ”We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” is the first single to be released from the album and, like many of her other excellent breakup songs, the lyrics are driving us crazy. John Mayer? Taylor Lautner? Jake Gyllenhaal? Joe Jonas? Which of these guys is she never going to give the time of day to ever again? Maybe it’s someone we don’t even know! Tay, why must you torture us like this. The blond beauty always sings straight from her heart, so we know this must be a page ripped right out of her diary.
Taylor confirmed the truth to her breakup track in an interview that aired on Good Morning America today. The song is about a breakup that was on and off. But what really inspired it was when a friend of her ex told her he heard she and the mystery ex were going to be rekindling the romance. Her lyrics set the record straight: “You go talk to your friends, talk to my friends, talk to me/ But we are never ever, ever, ever getting back together.”
We hear you loud and clear, Taylor. We know she’s head over heels for Conor Kennedy after purchasing a new house near his family’s compound, so she is definitely not looking for new love anytime soon. But who is this ex who is so new song worthy? Your guess is as good as ours. Here’s a gallery of her real and rumored bfs for you to choose from.
[Photo: Getty Images]
When Us Weekly first reported spotting Katy Perry and John Mayer canoodling at Soho House in West Hollywood last week, we had mixed feelings — doubt, confusion, reluctant understanding, nostalgia for the Russell Brand days. And those feelings haven’t gone away now that we have photographic evidence that the two singers have been enjoying each other’s company. They were snapped in a car outside the Chateau Marmont, also in West Hollywood, on Wednesday night. A witness told Us they were holding hands across the table, kissing and laughing together.
We sort of get it. On his side, he clearly loves stunning, very famous ladies, with fantastic curves (or two out of three in the case of Taylor Swift). On Katy’s side, we did hear that the main rift between her and Russell was that he was ready to settle down while she still wanted to party it up and enjoy her youth, fame and fortune. Dating a notorious player like Mayer is certainly a good place to start when sowing wild oats. That’s probably what she thought she was getting with admitted sex addict Brand, after all.
For the love of music, though, please no one encourage these two to sing a duet. The thought of their clashing styles makes our ears hurt.
[Photo: Splash News Online]
We don’t get it. We just do not get it. Our minds and hearts must not be able to process the powerful sexual voodoo performed by John Mayer, because we find it baffling that Katy Perry is allegedly hooking up with him…again. Is she the only person in American who hasn’t heard Taylor Swift’s “Dear John”? Apparently so, because according to Us Weekly the two were spotted canoodling at the Soho House in West Hollywood. “They were affectionate, holding hands and cuddling!” their source claims. But…but that Playboy interview! And his hat, Katy! His hat!
As we regrettably mentioned, this isn’t the first time Katy and John have cuddled and held hands. That’s all they were doing; we refuse to believe otherwise. On the night before she met her ex-husband-to-be Russell Brand at the 2009 VMAs, Perry allegedly indulged in the baffling charms of Mr. Mayer. Whoa…has John Mayer just been waiting in the wings this entire time, just hoping that Perry would one day be single again? Apparently no marriage can withstand Mayer’s raw animal charisma! We just threw up in our mouths a little bit typing that!
We know it can’t be easy to be an ex-boyfriend of Taylor Swift, or an ex-girlfriend of John Mayer — you know you’re in danger of being skewered in a hit song or winding up with a rather unique nickname in the press. Still, it’s been two years since the two of them dated each other, so we were thought they’d have other exes to tear down. Not so much. We just learned how “humiliated” Mayer felt after hearing Swift’s “Dear John” song, and now according to the New York Post, it sounds like she doesn’t even want to be near him. She was about to be seated at West Hollywood hot spot Tower Bar, a source told Page Six, when she spotted Mayer sitting nearby. Swift promptly asked to be seated elsewhere (and the source said this was “drama central” but that sounds a little much).