It’s one of the greatest mysteries since contemplating the beginning of the universe: Who is Taylor Swift “never ever, ever getting back together” with in her new song, “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”? It’s all we can think about since she announced the release of Red in an online chat with her fans last night. ”We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” is the first single to be released from the album and, like many of her other excellent breakup songs, the lyrics are driving us crazy. John Mayer? Taylor Lautner? Jake Gyllenhaal? Joe Jonas? Which of these guys is she never going to give the time of day to ever again? Maybe it’s someone we don’t even know! Tay, why must you torture us like this. The blond beauty always sings straight from her heart, so we know this must be a page ripped right out of her diary.
Taylor confirmed the truth to her breakup track in an interview that aired on Good Morning America today. The song is about a breakup that was on and off. But what really inspired it was when a friend of her ex told her he heard she and the mystery ex were going to be rekindling the romance. Her lyrics set the record straight: “You go talk to your friends, talk to my friends, talk to me/ But we are never ever, ever, ever getting back together.”
We hear you loud and clear, Taylor. We know she’s head over heels for Conor Kennedy after purchasing a new house near his family’s compound, so she is definitely not looking for new love anytime soon. But who is this ex who is so new song worthy? Your guess is as good as ours. Here’s a gallery of her real and rumored bfs for you to choose from.
When Us Weekly first reported spotting Katy Perry and John Mayer canoodling at Soho House in West Hollywood last week, we had mixed feelings — doubt, confusion, reluctant understanding, nostalgia for the Russell Brand days. And those feelings haven’t gone away now that we have photographic evidence that the two singers have been enjoying each other’s company. They were snapped in a car outside the Chateau Marmont, also in West Hollywood, on Wednesday night. A witness told Us they were holding hands across the table, kissing and laughing together.
We sort of get it. On his side, he clearly loves stunning, very famous ladies, with fantastic curves (or two out of three in the case of Taylor Swift). On Katy’s side, we did hear that the main rift between her and Russell was that he was ready to settle down while she still wanted to party it up and enjoy her youth, fame and fortune. Dating a notorious player like Mayer is certainly a good place to start when sowing wild oats. That’s probably what she thought she was getting with admitted sex addict Brand, after all.
For the love of music, though, please no one encourage these two to sing a duet. The thought of their clashing styles makes our ears hurt.
We don’t get it. We just do not get it. Our minds and hearts must not be able to process the powerful sexual voodoo performed by John Mayer, because we find it baffling that Katy Perry is allegedly hooking up with him…again. Is she the only person in American who hasn’t heard Taylor Swift’s “Dear John”? Apparently so, because according to Us Weekly the two were spotted canoodling at the Soho House in West Hollywood. “They were affectionate, holding hands and cuddling!” their source claims. But…but that Playboy interview! And his hat, Katy! His hat!
As we regrettably mentioned, this isn’t the first time Katy and John have cuddled and held hands. That’s all they were doing; we refuse to believe otherwise. On the night before she met her ex-husband-to-be Russell Brand at the 2009 VMAs, Perry allegedly indulged in the baffling charms of Mr. Mayer. Whoa…has John Mayer just been waiting in the wings this entire time, just hoping that Perry would one day be single again? Apparently no marriage can withstand Mayer’s raw animal charisma! We just threw up in our mouths a little bit typing that!
We know it can’t be easy to be an ex-boyfriend of Taylor Swift, or an ex-girlfriend of John Mayer — you know you’re in danger of being skewered in a hit song or winding up with a rather unique nickname in the press. Still, it’s been two years since the two of them dated each other, so we were thought they’d have other exes to tear down. Not so much. We just learned how “humiliated” Mayer felt after hearing Swift’s “Dear John” song, and now according to the New York Post, it sounds like she doesn’t even want to be near him. She was about to be seated at West Hollywood hot spot Tower Bar, a source told Page Six, when she spotted Mayer sitting nearby. Swift promptly asked to be seated elsewhere (and the source said this was “drama central” but that sounds a little much). Read more…
John Mayer is known for controversial comments in interviews as they pertain to women and ex-girlfriends. How ironic, then, that his feelings were hurt over Taylor Swift’s “Dear John” from the 2010 Speak Now album. Two years later, John tells Rolling Stone magazine that he was “humiliated” by his rumored ex’s song. Even after Mayer’s low-key hiatus after he divulged troubling information about his sexual desires in Playboy two years ago, we see he hasn’t learned Rihanna’s tactic of not answering certain questions that may cause a stir. Read more…
Wow, John Mayer was remarkably contrite during his Ellen interview this week. The John Mayer who reflects wisely on his past seems like a totally different human being then the one who was embarrassing himself non-stop a few years ago. Ugh, does that mean we have to reevaluate our opinion of him? “It was a very strange time and it sort of rocketed me into adulthood. It was a violent crash into being an adult,” Mayer said of his numerous mistakes. “For a couple of years, it was just figuring it all out, and I’m glad I actually stayed out of the spotlight. … It was like, ‘No, idiot. Go away and be 33 and 34 instead of 28 for the fourth year.’ ” We applaud John’s journey down the road to self-discovery, but we have to wonder: Can we really get past all those amazingly dumb things he said in public? And do we haaaaaaave to? In case you’ve forgotten about John’s blunders, perhaps you’d care to remember…
His thoughts on ex-girlfriend Jessica Simpson: “Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me. It was like napalm, sexual napalm. Did you ever say, ‘I want to quit my life and just f—in’ snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to f— you, I would start selling all my s— just to keep f—ing you.’ ” Read more…
Love is a beautiful thing … most of the time. But sometimes there are those couples that just sketch you out. Whether they wear vials of each other’s blood around their necks, sell their children to reality TV, or just overdo it with the PDA, some duos don’t fill you with that warm and fuzzy feeling! The rumors of Bobbi Kristina Brown’s hookup with her adopted brother Nick Gordon is just the latest in a long line of celebrity couples that give us the willies. Love is blind, but watching these sketchy couples sometimes made us wish we were, too. Check out the rest in the gallery below!
Reverent footballer Tim Tebow is rumored to be dating most of Hollywood, and so is Taylor Swift. So it seemed like only a matter of time before the two would be somehow linked in a match made in slow-news-day hell. The two were first spotted together at a pre-Oscar party last weekend. “They were together for almost an hour,” a witness told Celebuzz. “She approached Tim and he looked more than happy to be talking with her.” And any elementary schooler knows that when a boy and a girl talk, it’s because they like each other.
But then again, Taylor does tend to have quite the active dating life. Wasn’t she supposed to be with Zac Efron, like, last week? She’s been linked to so many people that it’s hard to keep track! So as a public service, we’ve compiled a comprehensive history of Taylor Swift’s boyfriends, real and imagined. No need to thank us. Head on down to the gallery below to see the men behind all those breakup songs!
Keith Urban is headed for throat surgery later this month, to remove a polyp on his vocal chords. Unfortunately, he’s had to cancel performances including January’s All For The Hall benefit show in Nashville. It’s not a serious procedure, says his spokesperson, explaining, “The surgery, an out-patient procedure, while minor, will require complete voice rest followed by an undetermined period of recuperation.”
Even though he’ll be resting his vocal chords, Urban will go ahead with performances that require him to sing just one song, so there’s no strain.
Urban’s condition comes on the heels of similar injuries suffered by Adele, canceled her performances for the remainder of the year due to a throat hemorrhage, and John Mayer, who also had to cancel shows and postpone his album due to a throat lesion. And earlier this summer, R. Kelly had to have emergency throat surgery due to an abcessed tonsil. We really hope that we haven’t been asking too much of our favorite vocalists!
You wouldn’t think John Mayer would want any help when it comes to getting the ladies. The dude boasts a pretty impressive track record, having been seen out and about with A-listers like Jennifer Aniston, Taylor Swift, Jennifer Love-Hewitt and Cameron Diaz. Hell, he was even reportedly all up on a pre-Brand’ed Katy Perry. But despite a dating history that would make Don Juan weep, Johnny has dumped them all and still finds himself alone. So when he bumped into VH1′sTough Love relationship expert Steve Ward at a Save The Music function, the guitar-strumming heartbreaker asked for some hints to finding The One.
“When he had me alone, John asked me what I thought about his love life,” Ward told Celebuzz. “So I told him point blank, ‘I think you got a chip on your shoulder, man. You’re pissed off about your childhood or being bullied, and now you unfortunately take it out on women.’” The words apparently startled Mayer, but Steve definitely has a point. Remember when he outed ex-Jessica Simpson as “sexual napalm”? That phrase won’t be showing up on any Hallmark cards anytime soon.
“I told him he had to realize that he had won,” Ward continued. “He was 10 times more successful than the next most successful person to come out of his high school… I told him, ‘If I were you, I’d pat myself on the back, and let go of it.’” Wow, insightful! We would have just told him to keep his mouth shut. That’s probably why Steve has a relationship-advice show and we don’t.