by (@shalapitcher)

The Most Beyooootiful Drunk Awards Show Moments “OF ALL TIME!”

[GIF: Vulture]

[GIF: Vulture]


Awards season is kicking off this week, with the one-two punch of the People’s Choice Awards and the Golden Globes, and we are giddy with anticipation. And no, not to see our favorite movies and TV shows collect some hardware as their stars and creators thank their agents — c’mon, you know us better than that. We watch for those magical unscripted moments that happen thanks to someone pre-partying a little too hard, or, in the case of the Globes, hitting that free bubbly at the tables (Glenn Close GIF, we love you forever). It’s a magical thing that happens to stars big (Liz Taylor!) and small (aw, Lil Mama), at all kinds of kudosfests. Here we’re counting down our 10 favoritesssst munk droments:
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The Kentucky Derby’s 30 Most Awesome Celebrity Hats

At this weekend’s Kentucky Derby, the competition isn’t only on the track. Attendees are famous for wearing their biggest, brightest, and boldest hats in an effort to shield themselves from the sun — who are we kidding? — to stand out in the crowd of Churchill Downs. And a lot of those fabulous hats are on the heads of some of our favorite celebrities. From European fascinators to traditional straw hats, stars like Kim Kardashian and Paula Patton embraced the chance to embody true Southern elegance. Even Joey Fatone joined in on some fashion fun by sportingĀ a feathered hat when he attended the Kentucky Derby in 2010. Before we sit down and tune in to the 138th Kentucky Derby race, let’s take a look at the 30 most awesome hats we’ve seen in recent years.

[Photos: Getty Images]

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Judge Dismisses Boyfriend’s Conviction In Anna Nicole Smith Case

Anna Nicole Smith & Howard K. Stern

Good news for the hangers-on and Dr. Feelgoods of celebrities everywhere: Anna Nicole Smith‘s lawyer/boyfriend and psychiatrist have been let off the hook for her lethal 2007 overdose. Howard K. Stern and Dr. Khristine Eroshevich were found guilty of conspiracy to “commit the crimes of prescribing, administering and dispensing controlled substances to an addict” by a jury last October, based on the fact that the 11 prescription drugs found in Smith’s body were prescribed by Eroshevich to Stern and some fake names, rather than Smith herself.

The pair were in danger of losing their licenses, but Judge Robert Perry decided this morning to dismiss the conviction against Stern and reduce Eroshevich’s punishment to a year’s probation and a $100 fine. His logic? The pair were only trying to help their friend. “I don’t think there’s evidence that a layperson knows it’s illegal to write a prescription in another name for a celebrity,” he explained. Hear that, entourage members? Looks like there’s nothing wrong with funneling piles of prescription meds to your famous star as long as you have their best interests at heart.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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The Top 20 Skimpiest VMA Outfits Of All Time

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It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Musicians, celebrities and irrelevant D-Listers are gathering together once again this Sunday evening to celebrate the MTV Video Music Awards. Sure the VMAs are about music and videos and honoring future one-hit wonders (a-ha, anyone?), but really what they’re about is said stars and wannabees shocking us with their outfits…or lack there of.

The Grammys are where the music industry goes to class it up, but the VMAs are all about getting down. Like, nipple pasties down. We’ve picked out the skimpiest outfits to grace the VMAs white carpet over the years, scroll through the skin to see our number one skimpiest outfit.

Did we miss anyone? Tell us in the comments, and don’t forget to tune into the VMAs this Sunday night at 9/8c to see who leaves the house in next to nothing this year! Our money is on Best New Artist nominee Ke$ha – though maybe host Chelsea Handler will shock us with a little skin. We can’t wait!

20. Madonna, 2005

19. Mya, 2003

18. Beyonce, 2003

17. Brooke Hogan, 2005

16. Lady Gaga, 2009

15. Britney Spears, 2000

14. Fergie, 2006

13. Halle Berry, 2000

12. Christina Aguilera, 2002

11. Vivica A. Fox, 2003

10. Ashanti, 2003

9. Paulina Rubio, 2005

8. Mariah Carey, 1997

7. Pamela Anderson, 2001

6. Carmen Electra, 1997

5. Paris Hilton, 2003

4. Coco, 2004

3. Anna Nicole Smith, 2005

2. Lil Kim, 1998

1. Rose McGowan, 1998

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Anna Nicole’s Daughter Is Adorable

dannielynn

Two-and-a-half years after the tragic death of her mom Anna Nicole Smith, little Dannielynn charms the cameras and shows that she’s grown into a gorgeous little toddler. Enjoying a day out at Coldwater Canyon Park with dad Larry Birkhead, Dannielynn had fun on the swings and looked pretty as a picture in her monkey T-shirt and baby Crocs. After the traumatic circumstances of her mom’s death, and subsequent paternity scandal, it’s heartwarming to see this cute little girl just having a ball. [Photos: Splash News Online]

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Anna Nicole Smith’s Ex Charged With Supplying Her Drugs

Two years after her death, the first criminal charges have been pressed in the Anna Nicole Smith case. Her highly dodgy one-time fake “husband” and lawyer Howard K Stern and two doctors Sandeep Kapoor and Khristine Eroshevich were charged with conspiring to provide controlled substances to an addict between 2004 and 2007. He was arrested yesterday in Whittier, California, but made $20,000 bail. With the lawyers for her first husband J. Howard Marshall still fighting about dead people’s rights to his billions, the sad, tragic tale doesn’t look like it’s going to come to a close anytime soon.

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Anna Nicole Smith’s Lawyers Still Fighting Over Those Billions

In 1995, Anna Nicole Smith‘s 90-year-old husband of one year, J. Howard Marshall, died, leaving son Pierce Marshall and Smith to battle in court over his billion dollar estate. Smith eventually won $88.5 million, but the award was held awaiting appeal. In 2006, after stripping himself of most of his assets, the younger Marshall died. Smith herself died a year later. Now her lawyers are petitioning the Supreme Court to remove the stay on her award so they can chase the dead son of the dead husband’s money in the name of the dead woman.

“[Anna Nicole]‘s estate will undeniably suffer irreparable harm if the stay is not vacated, as Pierce’s executor claims there is no money to pay the district court judgment, and [Anna Nicole]‘s estate cannot pursue Pierce’s missing billions unless and until the stay is vacated,” said her lawyers. Because Larry Birkhead and Howard K. Stern need more money to fight over.

[Photo: WireImage]

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#20: Anna Nicole Smith’s Death

Playboy model. Senior citizen sex toy. The unholy love child of Marilyn Monroe and the Michelin Man. Anna Nicole Smith was created so the world could marvel at just how messed up one person could get and still not be Britney Spears. Just ask anybody who owns The Anna Nicole Show: The Complete Series on DVD.

The dust seemed to have cleared after the death of Smith’s 20-year-old son Daniel, from an overdose of prescription pills and methodone, and her commitment ceremony to lawyer and long-time pal Howard K. Stern. Then Smith’s lifeless body was found in a Florida hotel room in February 2007. The autopsy showed she had suffered an accidental overdose of prescription medication — none of which had actually been prescribed to her. Then things got really weird.

Stern took custody of Smith’s infant daughter Dannielynn, whose paternity was contested by ex-boyfriend Larry Birkhead. After a court battle and DNA test proving Birkhead was the father, Stern surrendered custody. Then a book alleged that Birkhead and Stern were really lovers. And then our heads exploded. — Charles Bottomley