by (@missmuttoo)

So This Is Happening: Jack White And The Insane Clown Posse Team Up

We do not know why this is happening, but it’s a sad day in music history. Jack White is going to produce Insane Clown Posse’s new release. Jack White. ICP. Together. WHY, God, why? They’ve also roped in JEFF the Brotherhood (from Nashville) as their backing band on a track that’s an interpretation of a little-known Mozart piece called Leck Mich Im Arsch. Which translates to “Lick me in the arse”. Who knew Mozart was so saucy? This is seriously, the weirdest story we’ve posted in a LONG time.

White and ICP’s version, according to their press release, melds “Mozart’s melody and lyrics sung in operatic German with ICP’s poignant lyrical addition in English and Jeff the B’s monster-riffs” and will be out September 13. In case you’re interested, the B-side of the single is called Mountain Girl which has ICP rapping about about their version of a sedentary country life. You know — shotgun weddings, meth addiction, moonshine and the like. Check out their teaser video which informs us that we’ve been waiting for this collaboration as it’s been “230 years in the making.”

by (@hallekiefer)

Charlie Sheen Cheered, Pelted With Trash At Gathering Of The Juggalos

So, Charlie Sheen’s Gathering of the Juggalos performance in Detroit Saturday night went about as well as you’d expect: booing, trash-throwing, wild cheering, repeat. Based on the fact he didn’t leave looking like past performers Tila Tequila and Method Man, we’d consider Charlie’s set the the Insane Clown Posse’s music fest a success, as well as a deeply rational career move and, quite possibly, his true calling.

Hopefully, the image of the Major League II star snatching garbage out of the nighttime sky like a crazy ninja will be great fodder for Charlie Sheen’s roast, airing September 16. “It’s not like you can take any of it personally. I’m actually looking forward to how creative they can get.”” Sheen told E! Online. “I’ve got my work brain back in my head. Welcome back work brain, I missed you.” Ohhh, maybe the Juggalos could sense Charlie’s work brain and were trying to attack it? Or are we thinking of zombies? Is there…is there much of a difference?

by (@missmuttoo)

Tila Tequila: Attacked On-Stage At Gathering Of The Juggalos?

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Tila Tequila is probably used to extreme reactions. Her love of  writhing on red carpets, her will she-won’t she Celebrity Rehab yo-yoing … exhibition streaking much? But nothing she’s ever done could have prepared her (or us), for what she was in for this weekend.

Tila was on stage at a the Gathering of the Juggalos concert in Illinois (you know, the “f*cking magnets, how do they work?” dudes) when the crowd apparently got dangerously out of hand, leaving her completely bruised and battered. She told TMZ about the incident stating, “ DUDES were throwing HUGE STONE ROCKS in my face, beer bottles that slit my eye open, almost burnt my hair on fire cuz they threw fire crackers on stage, and they even took the sh*t out of the port-0-potty and threw sh*t and piss at me when I was onstage.”

Is this true? Because it sounds totally unreal. No one deserves that sort of treatment, not even the most loathsome trainwreck in the world.

Tila aso said that even though she booked it to her trailer with her bodyguard and security team, it did nothing to deter the madness. The hecklers surrounded the trailer and tried to break in to get at her. Says Tila “… They almost got me so they finally reach the trailor, blood all over myself, cant stop bleeding, then all of a sudden, all 2 thousand people surround the trailor and busts the windows!!!  Even the guys INSIDE with me were shaking!  Their hands were shaking cuz they were so scared!  So 3 guys inside the trailor had to grab a table and push it over the broken windows and grabbed all the chairs they could find so hold the people from outside back…”

Colt Cabana a wrestler who was part of the crowd says that Tila took off her top in a desperate attempt to deter the crowd. It didn’t work because they carried on throwing things at her. Tila actually had to use security members as a shield against the assault. As a result she has some gruesome cuts and bruises, but waited till she got back to L.A to get treated as she wanted to get the hell out of there. It doesn’t hurt that her return home also made for a killer photo op (see above).  The police are currently trawling the internet for videos so they can ID culprits. Do you empathize with Tila? Let us know.

[Photo: Splash News Online]