To quote my boss, “Nooooooo, Joe!” (Only with more Os.) This was a reaction to the news that Paramount has decided to move G.I. Joe: Retaliation from its scheduled June 29 release to March 29, 2013. According to Deadline, this is because the studio would like to convert the whole thing to 3D. Wait, so we will now get to see the bulging biceps of Channing Tatum, Dwayne Johnson, Adrianne Palicki, D.J. Cotrona and Bruce Willis in three dimensions?
The John Chu-directed flick has a better chance of making big bucks overseas with 3D effects added, not to mention Channing Tatum won’t be competing against his own abs, which will be so lovingly displayed in Magic Mike, which is still coming out on June 29.
Bikini season is coming soon, people, but you should not be worried. Dwayne Johnson’s G.I. Boot Camp will whip you into shape just in time. Oh, what’s that? This is the new trailer for G.I. Joe: Retaliation, not an ad for the Rock’s new workout program? Maaaaybe. We do seem to recall seeing a lot of explosions and robots and an evil robot president impersonator guy (and only 2 seconds of Channing Tatum, which should be a federal crime, but whatever). But mostly, what’s sticking in our mind is some major inspiration to hit the gym right now. Here are the basic selling points of the G.I. Joe workout:
Looking this good in a simple T-shirt is difficult, but it is the best way to rally a group around your rogue operation to save the world. Roadblock (Johnson) will show you how. Read more…
We took a look at the women who are establishing themselves as the action heroines of the future, as well as some actresses from whom we want to see more onscreen butt-kicking. Did we miss anyone on our list? Check out our gallery and then let us know!
Remember when we were all so excited to watch Friday Night Lights star Adrianne Palicki run around in a stars n’ stripes colored body suit as Wonder Woman, only to have the show not go to series? Well now we know why our dreams were left unfulfilled. Footage from the NBC pilot has leaked and oof, is it rough. We’re about as lowbrow as it gets, but even the clip above is too cheesy for us — overacted and melodramatic with way too much intense eye work from the actors. You can also feel how excited the writers were when they discovered they could use the word “tits” on television. “OMG, we can have them say ‘tits?’ We gotta use it as much as possible, you guys! It’s so edgyyy!” Except that it’s not. It’s just awkward.
More photos of Adrianne Palicki on the Wonder Woman set have been released, with a few making painfully clear why policewomen don’t wear strapless bustiers while walking their beat. As you might have guessed, Adrianne appears to fidget with her top quite a bit between shots—imagine if she had to chase bad guys and fight them for real! For all the talk about Wonder Woman’s pants and boots, her bustier remains a ridiculous artifact from the Playboy Bunny era—or are we taking things too seriously? After all, it’s just a fantasy. Capes wouldn’t be a good idea for crimefighters in real life either, blockbuster movies and failing NBC dramas to the contrary.
See the gallery below for photos of Adrianne and her Palickis in action.
She may have put on some pants, but it looks like Wonder Woman still prefers to get her crime-stopping done in a strapless bustier. Adrianne Palicki was leaping over cars on the set of Wonder Woman yesterday, chasing a young thug in for such a lassoing. If Wonder Woman’s outfit wasn’t excitement enough for cleavage fans (seriously, why have bulletproof bracelets if you’re going to leave vital organs unprotected by even cloth?), Elizabeth Hurley, who’s playing the villain in the pilot episode, tweeted “Adrianne is gorgeous and, wow, can she fight!” Do we have some wrasslin’ to look forward to?
“Hey,” you may find yourself wondering from time to time, “how come none of the superheroes in these big budget Hollywood movies are women, MANNNN?” Well, while the big studios are still spooked by the dismal box office performance of Jennifer Garner’sElektra back in 2005, network execs whose playground is the small screen are still willing to take bets on the genre. Case in point, NBC has greenlit a Wonder Woman pilot, one that’s helmed by David E. Kelley and starring Adrianne Palicki, Elizabeth Hurley and Cary Elwes. Not exactly a Murderer’s Row of thespians, exactly, but it’ll do!
So, while we wait with baited breath to see if David E. Kelley can reverse his decade-long streak of creating terrible television programs, we can at least begin debating the merits (or lack thereof) of the new Wonder Woman outfit. Pictured, at left, is the first official image of Adrianne Palicki, former star of Friday Night Lights, as the new owner of the world’s most renowned Bulletproof Bracelets. And at right, naturally, is Lynda Carter, who utilized the Lasso of Truth to defeat countless misogynistic creeps during the four-year run of Wonder Woman from 1975-1979.
Anyone trying to fill Lynda Carter’s shoes has their work cut out for them. She was the definitive Wonder Woman. Having said that, we’re really not trying to set this lovely lady up for failure. Adrianne Palicki has apparently been cast to star in and portray Wonder Woman, the pilot series that David E Kelley is going to helm. Which means it already has a shot at doing super well, because Kelley, apart from being Michelle Pfeiffer‘s husband, is the veteran creator of shows like Picket Fences, Boston Legal, Ally McBeal and The Practice, which are just a few on his list of projects.
But who is Palicki? She played Tyra Collette, the town vixen, on Friday Night Lights and had a part on Supernatural. In terms of movies, she was in Legion (which we incidentally watched randomly on television last week) and will appear in Red Dawn, which is to be released later this year (it also stars the deelish Chris Hemsworth).
But will she make a good—no, great—Wonder Woman? Because the fandom that character inspires cannot be messed with. Good luck, Palicki. You’re going to need it.
[Photo: Getty Images]
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