by (@hallekiefer)

Madonna Bad-Mouths The Only Reason We Still Like Madonna

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Ugh, Madonna! Look, we strain to look past your fake accent, your infant or roid-filled boyfriends, and the last, oh let’s say, 8 albums you’ve made, to try and like you. Why do we go through the hassle? Because of one amazing movie, which we now find out you were bad-mouthing the whole time! In letter written during filming to her friend Steven Meisel, Madonna trash-talks A League Of Their Own, the greatest movie ever made, as well as Geena Davis, Chicago, and “girls” as a collective group. Says Madonna, “I cannot suffer any more than I have in the past month learning how to play baseball with a bunch of girls (yuk) in Chicago (double yuk) I have a tan, I am dirty all day and I hardly ever wear make-up.” We would scream but our throats are too busy closing up with rage!

“Penny Marshall is Lavern – Geena Davis is a Barbie doll and when God decided where the beautiful men were going to live in the world, he did not choose Chicago,” Madonna snarks. Geena Davis is twice the woman Madonna is (in both height and acting ability)! The way we see it: complaining about filming A League Of Their Own is like complaining about being at the signing of the Declaration of Independence: if you’re bored, then that’s a personal problem. We are only thankful she didn’t insult Rosie O’Donnell, or else she’d be in the process of getting her right-colored hair slapped off her head. [Photo: Hard Rock Memorabilia]