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The Evolution Of Heidi Montag: From Small Town Girl To Hollywood Barbie

Birthday girl Heidi Montag‘s drastic transformation may be nine months old, but on the 25th anniversary of her birth we could think of no more appropriate way to celebrate the constantly evolving starlet’s special day than to reminisce over her appearance old and new.
From the Colorado native’s fresh-faced days on The Hills to obtaining some big ol’ hills of her own, Heidi’s transformation to life-sized doll is nearly complete. Montag claims to regret some of the work she’s had done, but we have a feeling this spotlight addict’s makeover is hardly finito. Here are 25 photos dating back to 2006 documenting Heidi’s journey from Plain Jane to Playboy covergirl. [Photos: Getty Images]

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by (@JordanRuntagh)

Audrina Patridge Leaves Her Show, Reality TV, And Reality In General

Audrina Patrdige is so over reality TV, you guys. In fact, the former Hill‘s star claims that she won’t be returning for another season of her spinoff show, Audrina. The series started strong, but has since been lagging in ratings since premiering on VH1 in the spring. Perhaps the low viewer turnout left a bad taste in her mouth. “We finished in April and I kind of decided I wanted to take some time off from reality,” she told The Daily. “I want to do something like acting or hosting,”  And to spend more quality time with my bikini she no doubt thought.

Speaking of her famous beach bod, Audrina also addressed the rumors that she’s taken a cue from another (in)famous Hills alum and gone under the surgeon’s knife. “They always ask me about that because of Heidi [Montag]. There’s all these rumors and they all say I’ve had, like, six procedures, and I’m, like, ‘Where do you get that?’ Look at the pictures. I fluctuate in weight a lot.” She denied having any work done on her face, but got prickly when the topic of certain “enhancements” came up. “Well, see I have this chest problem,” she says. “My bone right here, it’s higher on this side? It’s pectoralis something, so I’ve always struggled with that. You could see they look different sizes all the time.” And there you have it: Audrina has mood boobs. Not implants. Mystery solved.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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The FABlife Bikini Awards: Reality Junkies

(It’s that time of year again! Welcome to TheFABlife Bikini Awards, where we pit half-naked celebs against each other and you vote for the finest skin-flaunter of the summer of 2011.)

Voting is now closed. Thanks for participating!

MTV and VH1 sure knows how to pick ‘em, eh? All the gorgeous ladies in our Reality Junkies category have done a stint on one — or both — of the networks. Whether they’re on the Shore or in Malibu, these women know how to werk it. But who’s the finest — Whitney Port, Heidi Montag, Deena Cortese or Audrina Patridge?

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by (@katespencer)

Heidi And Spencer: “We Were Wrong” About Fame, Fortune And Plastic Surgery

Oh, that hindsight! It sure is 20/20, as former Hills stars Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are finding out. After all the drama, posed paparazzi pics, fake appendages and Hermes bags, the batty blonds are now broke, unemployed and living with Spencer’s parents in Santa Barbara. They are also surprisingly candid and frank about the mess their antics have landed them in, antics that at one time made them some of the most famous — and loathed — people in America.

In an interview with The Daily Beast, Speidi (ugh, remember how we all bought into that?) spoke words of caution for Snooki and the Snookis of tomorrow. Says Pratt, “What we learned is: You can be too famous.” Other fascinating revelations from the pair:

  • Their divorce was completely fake (duh.) “We’ve never even been apart,” says Heidi.
  • They blew all their money on keeping up appearances. Heidi’s music, uh, career, cost them $2 million when all was said and done. “Everything we were doing, we were buying props,” says Spencer. “I bought a big blue monster truck just to drive it on The Hills for an episode. Never drove it again.”
  • Heidi admits she foolishly thought she could build the same personal brand as Kim Kardashian. She says, “I thought I had that potential. My ego got too big. To think I could be someone like that when I was the most hated girl ever.”
  • They claim they were mistreated by The Hills production team. Heidi: “I would film with Spencer and then I would film with Audrina. She would get treated like Meryl Streep and we would get treated like the trash.”
  • Heidi regrets all her plastic surgery (Gurl, you were so pretty before!) and has completely cut herself off from her family.
  • When you don’t have to listening to his gravely dude-brah voice, Spencer comes across as particularly astute. For example, this quote: “This isn’t a business. That was the big thing I didn’t get: Reality TV is not a career. Anyone who says, ‘Oh, you can have a career in reality’—that is a lie.”

Heidi is currently on VH1′s Famous Foods (apparently she is still attempting the whole ‘career in reality’ thing) while Spencer sits at home with his crystal collection. The entire interview is worth a read — especially if you aspire to be the next big star of Pawn Shoppin’ For Love: All-Stars.

[Photo: GettyImages]

 

by (@missmuttoo)

Heidi Montag’s Working Out 14 Hours A Day, Hosts Pool Party With Crystal Harris

Ok, how do we even begin with this one. A certain plastic wannabe celebrity, hated so much that she’s beloved, was missing for too long from our pages. Too damn long.  So ladies and gents, we present to you the trainwreck we all know as Heidi Montag! She emerged, clawing out of oblivion, hosting a pool party at Wet Republic in Las Vegas on Saturday, where  she spent most of the time prancing around in a bikini. Which she apparently, really got her surgically enhanced body in shape for. Montag told Us Magazine, “I’ve been working out from, like, 5 a.m. to 7 p.m. for two months now. I’ve been working out really hard because I had this pool party and I was like, I have to be in shape…”

You heard correctly. Heidi alleged she had been working out 14 hours a day to shed those pounds. OH, Heidi! We just realized just how much we missed you! We also totally love the fact that Heidi was co-hosting with Crystal Harris. Who should’ve been walking down the aisle with Hugh Hefner this weekend, but as we all know, Crystal and Hugh are dunzo. She’s doing fine though, so don’t be shedding any tears here. Crystal told People, “I’m doing okay. I just had to get away. Today is the day and I just had to get away. I’m going back tonight so I just wanted to get away for the day.” But running away and spending the day with Heidi? How does that make any sense?

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Heidi Montag, Jake Pavelka And Danielle Staub Shooting New Reality Show?

Well, this looks promising! The HillsHeidi Montag, former Bachelor Jake Pavelka, and Real Housewives anti-hero Danielle Staub were spotted shooting scenes in Hollywood for a new reality show, allegedly set to air on VH1. They are revamping a restaurant from the ground up,” a source told People. “They started shooting this past weekend.” All three stars gave affirmative, if vague, comments on the matter, with Montag tweeting the mind-blower “imagine if Chekov & Tolstoy wrote for reality TV.” Should we expect something really long and Russian then?

See photos from this meeting of the minds in the gallery—including Elliott Spitzer‘s favorite call girl Ashley Dupre—below. If Jake’s half as bitchy to Danielle as he was to his one-time fiancee on the Bachelor reunion special, this should get dramatic fast!

by (@hallekiefer)

Heidi Montag And Jason Biggs Spitball Ideas For The Next Twilight Knock-Off

Maybe after trying her hand at a musical career, an acting career and career consisting only of trying on bikinis and kissing in front of the paparazzi, Heidi Montag has finally found her calling in writing spooky teen romances. It can’t possibly hurt her career to try! Heidi Montag and Jason Biggs exchanged book ideas via Twitter today after Montag tweeted, “Thinking about writing a supernatural romance novel. Would you read?” to which Biggs replied “Holy s–t yes.” Not that we’d ever admit it to anyone, but our sentiments exactly.

The actor and the sort of actress got hot and heavy with their tweets, suggesting plenty of plot ideas, all of which sounded like real winners. “Heidi’s Romance Novel, Chapter 1: @biggsjason sits seductively on a tiger skin rug, wearing nothing but a yarmulke,” Montag triumphantly tweeted, finally concluding “So #HMRomNovel stars myself & @biggsjason. Need a good antagonist for the vampire KGB officer. Thinking @DannyPudi From Community.” As if the notion of a blood-sucking Russian official with Jason Bigg’s face isn’t enough to get the tweens swooning, Montag tweeted to Biggs, “Apparently @biggsjason is posing nude for the cover of my supernatural romance novel. Cross that one off my bucket list!” Wait a minute…just how did Heidi get a copy of our bucket list?

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

Speidi Teaming Up With Waka Flocka Flame, Blowing Millions On Music Career

Just because Heidi Montag blew millions on her singing career doesn’t mean she’s going to let a little thing like constant failure stop her dreams. “I spent $2 million on my music career, and it didn’t happen for me, and now I have this opportunity,” Heidi explained to RadarOnline. First off, Spencer Pratt teams up with Waka Flocka Flame, who despite all appearances is an actual successful recording artist. As of that wasn’t bizarre enough, Heidi brags that she’ll be working with Eric Nolan Grant, a jazz singer formerly of The O’Jays and a Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame Inductee. The man sang “Love Train” and this is what he’s reduced to!

As for Flocka Flame himself, he’s besties with Gucci Mane, and has collaborated with Lil’ Jon, Wiz Khalifa and a host of other real talent, so we can’t imagine his services come cheap. Or maybe he’s just brushing up for his reality show with Gucci Mane? “Spencer is going into the studio with Waka Flocka Flame, and I requested that his mother Deb Antney meet with me and manage me, because she is just fabulous,” Heidi gushed. We hope that new Maybach was worth the hours of hyena cackles you’re going to have to put up with now, Ms. Antney. “I want to make my own niche in the music world, that’s just Heidi,” Montag fantasizes. “It could be a Pink meets Britney Spears.” Hmm, two artist most popular in 2002 who never really moved on to anything more musically complex? Seems just about right for our girl.

by (@missmuttoo)

Heidi Montag Backtracks On Her Jennifer Aniston Comments

Through the years of Heidi Montag and by proxy, Spencer Pratt, we’ve gone from facepalming, to pulling our hair out, to feeling nothing. Thisprobably gets them to act even more insane than usual because they’re not getting the attention. Well, congratulations, guys, because you got it back. Because when Heidi Montag accused Jennifer Aniston of banning her from the Just Go With It premiere on Tuesday, we couldn’t help but burst out laughing. She had shot her mouth off saying, “I’m so upset. I was so excited! This is the first movie I’ve ever been in and I can’t walk the red carpet because Jennifer Aniston decided I was ‘too polarizing’.” We can’t help being rude (we’re lying, ’cause in Heidi’s case, we can) but the fact that Frankenheidi thought that she was a blip on Jen’s radar is truly hysterical.

Aniston’s people were forced to comment on the issue, and much to Heidi’s chagrin, brought Sony in, saying that Miss Montag had not responded to the company’s RSVP. So now Heidi’s realized she’s probably pissed off people she really shouldn’t have. Is anyone surprised she’s backtracking like crazy now? Because Heidi’s wailing, “I read that Jennifer had banned me from the premiere for being too polarizing, but I know now that it wasn’t true.It never really made sense to me because Jennifer is such a sweetheart and she even commented before on a red carpet about how interesting and fun it was to have me in the movie.” Heidi’s banking on the fact that, “It was all a big misunderstanding.”

And here’s the best part. After making all that fuss about not being allowed on the carpet, her excuse for not turning up finally was, “I got my invite and I would have loved to be there, but I had to be in Los Angeles with my dogs.” Do you hear that sound? It’s people chasing Heidi out of Hollywood with pitchforks.