by (@emilyexton)

These Surprise Celebrity Wedding Guests Are Better Than A Chocolate Fountain

John Travolta Crashes Wedding

If you set out to do anything in this life, it should be to spot Bill Murray in the wild. The legendary actor has repeatedly gained attention for popping up in random places, be it a New York dive bar or an intimate house party. So the news that he crashed the Memorial Day weekend bachelor party among a group of Boston College grads is par for the course. But what other big names have shown up to nuptials uninvited?

Read more…

by (@shalapitcher)

Honey Boo Boo, Chris Brown And Panem: 10 Signs The Mayan Apocalypse Really Should Happen Now

Chris Brown's tattoo, Honey Boo Boo-inspired porn among the 10 reasons the world should just end already

So folks at NASA and archaeologists and real news reporters are trying to tell everyone to simmer down about the apocalypse coming on December 21, because of science and stuff. But we’re beginning to suspect differently. Even if the Mayans themselves didn’t think the end of the 13th baktun (things we’ve learned this week!) didn’t actually meant the end of the world, we’ve noticed some signs that really, we should just give up and retreat to our bunkers right now. Let us count down our top 10:

Gossip Girl

10. Gossip Girl was Dan Humphrey all along! (And also, everyone on the island was dead!) Oof. The resolutions of series-long mysteries are never as good as we want them to be, probably much like the answers to life’s big questions. Bleh.

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West

9. All the hip-hop greats are running corporations, starring on reality-TV shows or dating the stars of reality-TV shows. Not that they shouldn’t trade thug life for the good life, but did they have to sell their artistic souls in the process?
Read more…

by (@hallekiefer)

Apologies To Will Ferrell, But His New Dad ‘Stache Must Join Our 10 Worst Celeb Mustaches

Wille Ferrell Sports Mustache In Miami

Good lord! That’s the most severe case of Dad ‘Stache we’ve ever seen! Will Ferrell was spotted at Art Basel in Miami this week, wearing what we can only assume is a costume for his upcoming role as a wise old fisherman. Or our uncle from Chicago. Our wise, old fisherman uncle from Chicago. Seeing as how the SNL alum is usually clean-shaven/the star of our elaborate Anchorman-themed fantasies, these photos go to show the devastation a bad mustache can bring to a celebrity’s handsome face. Ferrell obviously isn’t the only one to suffer a terrible lip rug, as our 10 Worst Celeb Mustaches can attest. Michael Cera? James Franco? Mickey Rourke? We don’t know why a line of hair can make so much of a difference, but it does. A terrible, terrible difference.

View Photo Gallery

[Photo: Getty Images/ Splash News Online]

by (@hallekiefer)

The 10 Most Festively Bizarre Things About The John Travolta/Olivia Newton-John Music Video

Looks like Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa came early this year! Or, if you celebrate Eid al-Fitr, super late! Whatever faith tradition you belong to, we can guarantee you’ll still be baffled by John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John‘s video for their new holiday classic “I Think You Might Like It.” Great Christmas song title, you guys! It goes without saying that there is a variety of weirdnesses going on in the self-made video, but we tried to isolate the 10 weirdest for you to wrap your holiday-loving brain around:

Read more…

by (@shalapitcher)

Kirstie Alley Didn’t Have An Affair Affair With Travolta, But She Is The Ultimate Shipper

Oh good, we can stop picturing Kirstie Alley and John Travolta having hot Scientologist sex now. Oh, wait, that image is already burned into our heads forever, even though Alley says it never happened. And actually, she never DID say it happened, even though the second we all saw quotes about her Look Who’s Talking co-star being the “greatest love” of her life, that’s what we assumed. Actually, she told Jimmy Kimmel last night, their relationship was never sexual, nor was her loving friendship with Patrick Swayze.

“Can I just clarify? They were not sexual affairs,” she said. “I didn’t say the word affair ever. … John Travolta is and has remained one of my best friends for almost 25, 26 years — before he was married, but I was married. But I fell in love with him.”

Actually, she said the feeling was mutual, and it evolved into a “beautiful friendship” between her, John and his wife, Kelly Preston. She even got their blessing to write about all this in her book (the reason she’s doing all these weird interviews), The Art of Men (I Prefer Mine al Dente).

What’s really interesting, however, is that she also basically confirms everything us regular people assume about every single on-screen couple: that it’s impossible for them not to fall in love IRL. Read more…

by (@lindseyweber)

Kirstie Alley Interrupts Election Night To Tell Everyone John Travolta Isn’t Gay

We don’t know about you, but we were fully focused on last night’s election tallies. As was, we noted, most of America. Our Twitter feed scrolled faster than ever before, as the country collectively chattered about the impending results. Meanwhile, smack in the middle of all the politics, comes a tweet from The Hollywood Reporter: “@KirstieAlley Fell in Love With Patrick Swayze, John Travolta While Married to Parker Stevenson.” WHAAAAAAT?! Hold the polls, America, Kirstie Alley is (in her very own special way) is deciding that now is the time to share with the world that John Travolta is not gay. Mind you, this is the same night that Americans voted for legalizing gay marriage in Maine

“I know John. With all my heart and soul, he’s not gay,” says Alley, who is a devoted Scientologist, along with Travolta. “I think it’s some weird way, in Hollywood, if someone gets big enough and famous enough, and they’re not out doing drugs and they’re not womanizing, what do you say about them?”

True, Travolta has not been womanizing.  But he has allegedly been doing the opposite of womanizing (manizing?), per reports that he grabbed the junk of a masseuse back in May. Well, it’s up to you decide if you believe this and if you’re going to buy Kirstie’s new book, The Art of Men (I Prefer Mine al Dente), but just imagine if these two had actually shacked up in real life! It’s a dream lost, along with the dream that we’d give birth to a child with the voice of Bruce Willis.

[Photo: Getty Images & Kirstie Alley's Twitter]

by (@hallekiefer)

John Travolta’s Toxic Avenger Remake Might Be The Only Way To Get Us Back On The Travolta Train

John Travolta Connected To Toxic Avenger Remake

Choo choo! The John Travolta train is rolling into the station! As you might remember, the train had been driven out of the station earlier this summer, conducted by a motley crew of enraged masseurs. The controversy swirling around Travolta has since died down, but we’d be lying if we didn’t admit it had left a bad taste in our mouth. Now that taste can be replaced with toxic slime! Oh wait…that’s still gross. Whatever, we’ll deal with the acrid burning as long as rumors about John Travolta allegedly joining the cast of the Toxic Avenger remake is true!

For anyone who is unfamiliar with the 1984 Troma Entertainment classic, IMDB’s description says it all: “The Toxic Avenger is born when mop boy Melvin Junko falls into a vat of toxic waste. Now evildoers will have a lot to lose.” According to The Grid, Travolta has signed on as an actor. “Action-comedy remake in the vein of THE MASK… he’s an environmental superhero…doesn’t want it to be campy…,” the site reveals about the film. We doubt Travolta will actually be playing the Avenger himself (every action movie needs a villain, after all), but wouldn’t that be an amazing step forward on our journey to loving John Travolta again? Especially if he also never, ever, ever gets another massage as long as he lives?

[Photo: Troma Entertainment/ Getty Images]