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There Are Only Five Reasons We’d Subscribe To Sarah Palin’s News Channel

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In her latest attempt to prove her maverick status, former vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin is launching a paid news channel. For $9.95 a month, fans of the Republican darling can get access to the channel, which aims to “go beyond the soundbites and cut through the media’s politically correct filter.”

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by (@shalapitcher)

Dina Lohan, You’re Not Alone: 5 Other Disastrous Celebrity Interviews We Love

We never thought we’d feel sorry for Dina Lohan, but watching her squirm while being grilled by Dr. Phil yesterday kinda did the trick. Maybe she was drunk; maybe she was just really embarrassed by another round of accusations that she was responsible for Lindsay Lohan’s downfall and was taking money from her daughter. Whatever the cause, the result was disaster for her/ratings gold for Dr. Phil. But while we confess to having a few laughs over coverage of the interview, we’d like to take this moment to comfort Ms. Lohan. You’re not the first famous person to fall apart on national television, and you won’t be the last. Here are 5 celebrities who have survived (mostly) the aftermath of their terrible sitdowns.

5. Joaquin Phoenix on The Late Show With David Letterman


The audience was nowhere near as shocked as Letterman himself when Joaquin appeared with sunglasses, a scruffy beard and greasy hair and uncomfortably mumbled through their whole interview. The host tried to draw Phoenix out by praising his work and co-stars, but he was having none of it. Turns out, it was all part of his mockumentary, I’m Still Here, which was nowhere near as entertaining as this clip was on its own.

4. Kanye West on Today


“I’m here to say that I made mistakes and that I’ve grown as a person,” ‘Ye told Matt Lauer during their 2010 sitdown, but then he proceeded to do kind of the opposite. As he tried to explain his statement that “George Bush doesn’t care about black people” and his interruption of Taylor Swift at the VMAs, he grew increasingly incensed at show producers for running footage while he spoke. We kind of understand his point, but his Twitter rant after the appearance was the stuff of legend. Kanye’s kept his interviews to a minimum since then. Read more…

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Sarah Palin Says She’s Not “Anti-Rap,” Just Disapproves Of “Violent” Common

Sarah Palin would hate for you to think she was playing the race card or anything when she criticized Barack Obama for letting rapper/actor Common speak at White House poetry celebration last night. You see, Common is one of those cop-killing, violence-inciting thug rappers you’ve heard about. “This rapper—we thought that we were to be united under the leader of the free world, Barack Obama, in tamping down racism and inciting violence and cop killing, certainly, and killing a former president,” Palin said on Fox News last night. “All those things that this rapper has glorified and really is known for, it just certainly reflects a lack of judgment on the White House’s part.”

In case you really knew Common for acting in films like Just Wright, recording albums with ?uestlove and sweetly proposing to a suburban deaf girl in the “Come Close” video, Palin is referring to a song recorded about Black Panther Assata Shakur and another lyric about “burning Bushes.” But don’t think she’s not down with hip-hop for equating Common with Eazy-E. “I am obviously a proponent of free speech. I’m not anti-rap. In fact, like Bret Baier, I know the lyrics to ‘Rapper’s Delight,’” Sarah Palin said. “But I am saying just common decency in the White House—wouldn’t we like to see a reflection of all that is wonderful and great, a shining city on a hill that the White House is supposed to be, with events inside of that house that reflect the patriotism and the decency and the influence of America.” So people who dare to voice support for ’60s activist figures and make mean metaphors about unpopular politicians shouldn’t get to recite poetry there. Gotcha, Sarah. But do you really like that Sugarhill Gang lyric about “super sperm”?

Watch The Daily Show‘s Jon Stewart rip into the anti-Common rhetoric on Fox after the jump.

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Julianne Moore’s First Photo As Sarah Palin Released

It’s not Tina Fey uncanny, but it might do. The HBO movie Game Change, about the 2008 Presidential Election, begins production today, with the network releasing a photo of Julianne Moore in costume as former VP nominee Sarah Palin. Ed Harris will de-sexify himself to play John McCain, while Woody Harrelson takes on campaign manager Steven Schmidt, who you might remember as the cueball who didn’t have much nice to say about Palin after the election. Hilariously, a photo of Moore as Hilary Clinton (she was set to play the Secretary Of State in HBO’s The Special Relationship before scheduling conflicts) hit the web earlier this month.  Do you think she would have got this part if she’d stuck with that one?

Check out photos of Palin and Moore in the gallery below.

[Photos: /HBO]

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Levi Johnston Drags Out His 15 Minutes By Writing A Tell-All Book

Levi Johnston was the most famous political baby-daddy in all the land for a while there (until John Edwards came in and stole his thunder, that rascal). Johnston’s relationship with Bristol Palin has been over for a while now and Bristol has been quietly dating an Alaskan pipeline worker for a few months, so you’d think Johnston should be un-famous by this point, but he just keep milking these fifteen minutes of fame.

Johnston just announced that he’s writing a tell-all book about the Palin family called Deer in the Headlights: My Life in Sarah Palin’s Crosshairs. Subtle! His publisher explains that it will be “a fascinating tale of a misunderstood boy figuring out how to be a man and a father after being thrust into the spotlight and subsequent media circus at a very young and vulnerable age.” When we think of a guy famous for having unprotected sex and also famous for posing in Playgirl, we don’t think “vulnerable” but that’s just us. Johnston himself says “I want to tell the truth about my close relationship with the Palins… my sense of Sarah, and my perplexing fall from grace.” Yeah, it’s real perplexing when your fall from grace comes after you become famous for having unprotected sex and for posing in Playgirl. Sorry, we’re a little hung up on that.

Still, no one moves books like Sarah Palin, whether you love her or you hate her, so it’s probably going to be a bestseller.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Julianne Moore To Play Sarah Palin In HBO’s Game Change

We see the resemblance, but can she play folksy? Entertainment Weekly reports that four-time Oscar nominee Julianne Moore has signed up to play Sarah Palin in HBO’s upcoming adaptation of Game Change, Mark Halperin and John Heilemann‘s best-selling behind-the-scenes account of the 2008 Presidential election. The film will be directed by Jay Roach, who also made the 2000-election film Recount for the network (he also directed the Austin Powers movies). Hey, didn’t they forget to make one about John Kerry‘s 2004 run? Matthew Modine‘s agent is still waiting for that call!

While Recount avoided showing us the nominees and stuck to the campaign managers on the sidelines, the signing of Moore suggests we should expect some big names to play the big politicians involved. Will Mickey Rooney crawl out for John McCain? Tim Meadows for Barack Obama? Or will they go for Academy-level caliber, like Robert Duvall and Will Smith? Either way, we’re excited to find out what’s in store.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Oops! Tracy Morgan Makes Masturbation Joke About Sarah Palin On Live TV

Execs at TNT are a little embarrassed this morning and have issued an apology because of some course language Tracy Morgan dropped last night on the network. Tracy showed up on Inside The NBA to chat with hosts Charles Barkley and Kenny Smith and the men began discussing who was hotter, Tina Fey or Sarah Palin. Morgan replied “Let me tell you something about Sarah Palin, she’s good masturbation material.” Dirty and uncalled for? Sure. But honestly, what do you expect when you goad Tracy Morgan on live TV into discussing a woman’s attractiveness? The man is the very definition of loose cannon. A spokesperson for the network said this morning “It’s unfortunate Mr. Morgan showed a lack of judgment on our air with his inappropriate comments.” Yes, it is, but it’s also unfortunate that you’re unfamiliar with Tracy Morgan’s m.o.

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DWTS News: Was Bristol Forced To Do The Show? Will Lindsay Dance Next Season?

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Dancing With The Stars ended last week and yet it seems like there’s always some new gossip regarding the show’s participants. First up on the docket today is the news that Margaret Cho, who was kicked off early this season, is claiming that Bristol Palin was essentially forced to do the show by her Mama Grizzly, Sarah, to help repair their family image. Cho wrote on her blog:

Why did Bristol do Dancing with the Stars? I heard from someone who really should know (really should seriously know the dirt really really) that the only reason Bristol was on the show was because Sarah Palin forced her to do it. Sarah supposedly blames Bristol harshly and openly (in the circles that I heard it from) for not winning the election, and so she told Bristol she “owed” it to her to do DWTS so that “America would fall in love with her again” and make it possible for Sarah Palin to run in 2012 with America behind her all the way. Instead of being supposedly “handicapped” by the presence of her teen mom daughter, now Bristol is going to be an “asset” – a celebrity beloved for her dancing.

We actually think Bristol should be beloved for her abstinence PSA, but that’s us. Of course this is speculation, but the Palins are clearly a calculating family who have an image to uphold. And speaking of people who need image rehabilitation, DWTS has allegedly put Lindsay Lohan on their short list of dancers for next season. An obviously Massachusetts-bred anonymous source tells Radar Online “The girl can dance. Lindsay is wicked talented.” We love the insanity behind the casting process for this show.  Melanie Griffith is desperate to be on and they won’t have her, but random folks like Kyle Massey make it to the finals and addicts like Lindsay are coveted and political daughters are forced into it. These are your “stars”, America!

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@JordanRuntagh)

Sarah Palin Busted For Beating Fish To Death On Film

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Do you find it “weird” to hold the still-thumping heart of a dying creature in your hand? Well then you and Sarah Palin have something in common, my friend! Around Thanksgiving 2008, Sarah Palin gave a filmed interview with a turkey being slaughtered in the background. Maybe that sparked some kind of Thanksgiving animal cruelty tradition for the Palins, because now they’re under fire for a segment on their reality show. Animal rights activists are furious over a clip from Sarah Palin’s Alaska which depicts the former Vice Presidential candidate clubbing a halibut to death.

Camera crews filmed Sarah and dancing-queen-daughter Bristol while on a fishing expedition over the summer. But this was no ordinary Hallmark-style fishing trip down by the creek. This venture included beating the fish to death with a blunt instrument, allegedly a common practice among fishermen. The Alaska Charter Association claims that this technique is actually the most “humane” way to kill a fish, saying that it “minimizes the suffering.” Even so, we’re not so sure where grabbing the animal’s beating heart comes into play. Neither is the activist group In Defense of Animals, which isn’t too thrilled with the whole thing. “Sarah Palin’s complete lack of compassion as demonstrated in this snuff video is disgusting,” they said in a statement. “Most disturbing is the way she seems to enjoy causing suffering to other beings. When they laugh about the beating heart that Bristol holds in her hand, their complete insensitivity to the animal kingdom becomes clear.”

It’s an Alaskan Thanksgiving with the Palins!

[Photo: Splash News Online]