The nominations for the 2013 Oscars were announced bright and early this morning, and that brings with it another time-honored tradition: The Oscar betting pool! It’s the time of the year when suddenly everyone is a regular Siskel and Ebert, passionately weighing in on a bunch of films that we (probably) haven’t seen, guessing who’s going to take home the little gold bald dude. Normally we just bet on the thespian who has won the most accolades in the past, but this year it gets a little more tricky: ALL of the Best Supporting Actors have won Oscars before! The track record is fairly similar in the Best Leading Actor category too, with Academy honored legends like Daniel Day-Lewis, Denzel Washington and Joaquin Phoenix going head to head. Ahh, clash of the Titans! What are we going to do!?
Well, never fear, folks, because we’ve taken the time to handicap all of the actors for you, in basically the least-expert way possible. We went through their cinematic performances broken down into all the pros and cons that you need to make an informed decision for your Oscar night scorecard. Don’t worry, we’ve got one for the actresses too! Read on…
Daniel Day-Lewis: Abraham Lincoln in Lincoln
Why He Has A Good Shot: Not only did the master craftsman give the performance of his career by bringing back the controversial president, but he also grew his own beard, you guys.
What Might Hold Him Back: The Academy forgets that his last name has a hyphen, accidentally awards an Oscar to a “Daniel Day Lewis.”
Bradley Cooper: Pat Solitano in Silver Linings Playbook
Why He Has A Good Shot: Brad really showed that he was much more than a pretty face/funny guy in David O. Russell’s alt- dramedy.
What Might Hold Him Back: People are still pissed at him for beating out Ryan Gosling as People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive back in 2011.
Have you ever heard of the Baader-Meinhof effect? Basically it’s a cognitive illusion in which, once you become aware of something, you notice it everywhere. For us, 2012 meant a year of noticing wigs in every single aspect of our lives. From TV shows like Vampire Diaries to movies like Liz & Dick to meat space like celebrities’ heads, we couldn’t blink without seeing yet another wig. Nor did we want to.
For example, did anyone else see The Hobbit? Critics turned up their nose at the film’s length, but no one breathed a word about all the magnificent dwarf wigs. (It’s better this way. It was a delightful surprise.) While we try to figure out how to obtain a braided-beard-attached-to-a-toupee wig like ol’ Bombur, check out the best of the best of 2012’s wigs. Lindsay Lohan…you did us proud. Did we miss any winners? Please tell us. We genuinely want to know!
[Photo: Lifetime/HBO/New Line Cinema/Lionsgate]
In case you live in some kind of maximum security prison on the moon and only just got internet access today, Men In Black III opened this weekend! While we know you and your sunburned relatives saw it, the threequel to Will Smith‘s career launching film allegedly only pulled in $70 million in the U.S. Despite the price of 3D tickets and Smith’s established reputation as an eerily youthful box office guarantee, that’s actually less than what the first MIB pulled made its first weekend. So what could have drawn an audience to MIB III of the same size and intensity that flocked to MIB? We don’t know much about movies, but having seen the flick, our spoilery suggestions include:
- We came for aliens, not time travel! If we wanted time travel with a few aliens sprinkled in, we would watch Back To The Future and Earth Girls Are Easy on two TVs simultaneously.
- The jokes might have had too much Big Willie style! Remember when there was that rumor last year alleging Will Smith hired his own writer for MIB III, a writer that the other writers were initially unaware existed? After seeing this movie, we wouldn’t be surprised. “The comedy of Men In Black is not exactly my comedy,” Will said at the movie’s premiere. He said it! Not us!
- The last movie was ten whole years age! Maybe give the kids some way to get into the film if it they weren’t obsessed with MIB in eighth grade like we were? Then maybe 56% of the film’s audience wouldn’t have been over 25.
- Emma Thompson is wasted talent! Excellent hair, but wasted talent.
- *The super spoiler alert we’re going to write for our #5 so be warned* Who would leave a three-year-old in a car parked unattended on the beach? That’s the craziest part of the movie, and half the cast is literally aliens.
After more than 20 years of speculation (including congressional hearings and enough books to constitute a literary genre), the conspiracy theories surrounding the assassination of John Kennedy broke in a big way thanks to Oliver Stone’s JFK, a three-hour epic stuffed with unforgettable cameos (John Candy‘s Nawlins lawyer and Kevin Bacon‘s Nixon-loving hustler – “fascism is coming back!” – deserve special mention) and so many potential conspirators (FBI, CIA, the Mafia, Communists, anti-Communists) that it’s unclear just who WASN’T on the grassy knoll.
Thanks to script leaks, articles lambasting the production as unconscionable and “insult to the intelligence” appeared only days into shooting. The furor hardly diminished when the film was finally released in 1992. Along with endless complaints of factual inaccuracies (Stone claims the movie is a “countermyth,” which means it’s completely full of it but in a good way), gay activists didn’t appreciate the film’s salacious treatment of alleged conspirators’ homosexuality, particularly the costumed orgy between Bacon, Gary Oldman, Tommy Lee Jones and Joe Pesci. Yes, Joe Pesci.
Despite (or thanks to) the uproar, the film was a financial success and nominated for eight Oscars. Everyone from the Simpsons to Seinfeld paid comic homage, and in the ultimate sign of cultural saturation, Congress passed the JFK Records Act, promising the release of all files concerning the assassination by 2017. Only nine years till the truth is out!