sign in to watch now

Don't miss out! Get full access to this show and many others.
Sign in now with your TV provider (it's included with your TV subscription).
  • Season 2, Ep 2

Gifted

Chrissy celebrates Jim's birthday with a big party and unique present. Jim takes his first swimming lesson from his son Pudie. Mama demands Chrissy style her for the cover of her new sex book.

aired 11/04/2013 · 20:24

>> PREVIOUSLY ON CHRISSY AND

MR. JONES...

>> WE ARE A TEAM, GET IT?

>> I'M NOT PART OF THE

WAKE UP TEAM, THOUGH.

BEING A FULL-TIME MOM

IS NEW TO ME.

>> YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO GET A

JOB TITLE AROUND HERE, BUDDY.

>> FUNNY.

IT SEEMS LIKE ALL THE STUFF

THAT I ASK HIM TO HELP ME WITH,

HE'S GIVING TO YOU.

>> WHAT HAPPENED WITH YOU AND

FREDDIE?

>> MISS PUMKASH DID NOT MEET

THAT PAPA TOUCHE.

SORRY.

>> WHAT'S WRONG WITH A PICNIC?

YOU ACT LIKE I'M PROPOSING

TO YOU OR SOMETHING.

ME AND MAMA JONES HAVE ALWAYS

HAD A SPARK.

THAT'S A TASER? NO!

[laughing] PLEASE!

>> LOVE IS A FUNNY THING.

GOT TO WATCH WHAT YOU ASK FOR.

♪ IF YOU'RE THE SUN ♪

♪ THEN I'M THE RAIN ♪

♪ WILL IT STORM

♪ CAN'T YOU SEE ♪

♪ OPPOSITES ATTRACT, BOO

♪ REALLY, GIRL

♪ WE LIKE ONE AND THE SAME

♪ SO

>> ♪ OH

♪ YOU'RE MY STAR ♪

♪ YOU'RE MY SUN ♪

♪ I'M YOUR SKY ♪

>> ♪ YOU'RE THE REASON ♪

♪ CAN'T YOU SEE ♪

♪ THE REASON I'M A BETTER ME ♪

[doorbell rings]

>> TODAY'S JIM'S BIRTHDAY,

AND I'M THROWING HIM A PARTY

LATER ON.

HI, LADY.

BUT FIRST,

NANCY ASKED ME TO COME BY.

SO A LOT TO TAKE IN FOR ONE DAY.

NANCY IN THE MORNING.

JIMMY IN THE AFTERNOON.

PRAY FOR ME.

SO WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOU?

>> OH, A WHOLE LOT.

IT'S THE LIQUOR,

THE PUMKASH CANDLES,

THE PERFUME,

THE PSYCHOTIC CONDOMS,

MY BOOK.

NOW, THIS IS WHERE I NEED YOU.

THAT'S WHY I REALLY NEED...

>> WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

YOUR BOOK.

>> IT'S A NICE, ROMANTIC BOOK.

MAMA JONES' GUIDE TO, YOU KNOW,

LOVE AND ROMANCE.

WHO BETTER THAN MAMA JONES

TO TELL YOU ABOUT LOVE AND

ROMANCE?

I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I'M DOING.

I HAVE ENOUGH KIDS, I MEAN,

HELLO.

>> WHAT WOULD THIS READ LIKE?

I AM VERY, VERY CURIOUS

AND A LITTLE SCARED.

>> I USED TO ALWAYS COULDN'T

UNDERSTAND MY MOM,

"NO KISSING. NO BOYS.

YOU GET PREGNANT."

BUT SHE'S RIGHT.

YOU START OFF WITH THE KISSING

AND THE WAY THE HANDS RUBBING

THE BODY, RUBS AGAINST EACH

OTHER,

AND NOW I UNDERSTAND

HOW I GOT PREGNANT.

>> [laughs]

IT'S FUNNY THAT NANCY'S WRITING

A BOOK ON LOVE AND ROMANCE

AND SHE TRIED TO [bleep] MINE

UP.

[laughs]

SO YOU CALLED ME OVER HERE

FOR WHAT, EXACTLY?

>> I NEED YOU TO STYLE ME

FOR A PHOTO SHOOT FOR THE BOOK.

>> IF YOU NEED ME TO HELP YOU,

I NEED YOU TO HELP ME UNDERSTAND

WHAT LOOK YOU WANT

FOR THIS COVER.

>> WELL, I WANT, LIKE,

SOMETHING SEXY.

A LACE DRESS THAT MIGHT BE

SEE-THROUGH.

AT FIRST, I WANTED TO JUST PUT

ROSES ALL UP IN ME.

MAKE ME LOOK SEXY ON THE COUCH.

>> IF I SAY NO, WE'RE GONNA HAVE

A FIGHT.

IF I SAY YES, WE STILL GONNA

HAVE A FIGHT.

>> [laughing]

>> SO I FEEL LIKE I'M NOT SAFE

EITHER WAY.

>> GIVE IT A TRY.

IF WE START OUT,

AND IT DON'T WORK, YOU SAY,

"REMEMBER YOU TOLD ME IF IT'S

NOT WORKING, I GOT TO GO.'"

>> OKAY. PEACEFULLY.

>> PEACEFULLY.

>> LAY POOL OUT ON GROUND.

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY.

>> WE HAVE TO PUT AIR IT, BABE.

>> BIRTHDAYS IS USUALLY PRETTY

GOOD FOR ME.

I USUALLY SPREAD THEM OUT.

IF WE START ON THE 15TH,

WE'LL PROBABLY END AROUND

THE 28TH.

>> OH, [bleep].

DON'T LET HIM ESCAPE!

>> THIS YEAR, CHRISSY'S ACTUALLY

THROWING ME A MIAMI-THEMED

BIRTHDAY...

IN THE BACKYARD.

>> WATCH HIM, BECAUSE HE'S GONNA

PEE.

>> EVERY YEAR'S ANOTHER YEAR

THAT I'M BLESSED TO BE HERE,

HAVE FAMILY WITH ME.

WHERE I'M FROM,

THE LIFE EXPECTANCY RATE IS

ABOUT 25, SO, YOU KNOW,

IT'S A BLESSING, MAN.

I COUNT MY BLESSINGS.

GIVE ME A HUG.

>> AWW.

>> ALL RIGHT, LET'S GET THIS

PARTY STARTED.

>> WAIT A MINUTE. I'M SCARED.

>> THIS IS HIS BIRTHDAY GIFT.

>> I SEE PENTHOUSE.

>> MM-HMM.

[all laughing]

>> I GOT THE LITTLE GOODY BAG,

DEFINITELY,

SO THIS WAY CHRISSY AND JIM

CAN HAVE A GOOD TIME

FOR HIS BIRTHDAY.

THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE YOURS.

THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE YOURS.

>> WHAT IS THAT, MOMMY?

>> YOU DRINK IT BEFORE

YOU HAVE SEX.

>> YOU SEE YOUR GRANDSONS

RIGHT HERE, RIGHT?

>> HER GIFTS ARE, LIKE--

LIKE, SOMETHING THAT HE DOESN'T

LIKE, SHE'LL PUT IT IN A BAG

AND THEN GIVE IT

TO HIM AND THAT.

IT'S JUST WEIRD STUFF,

BUT I WISH I WAS IN

THE POOL ALREADY.

>> WHILE SHE'S IN THE BATHROOM,

TO GET YOURSELF 'ROUSED UP,

YOU START READING THE BOOK.

[all laughing]

>> SO BY THE TIME SHE COME OUT,

EVERYTHING'S RIGHT.

>> SHE'S AN EXPERT AT SEX,

SO THAT MAKES HER A "SEX-PERT."

IT'S KIND OF LIKE AN INCESTUOUS

KIND OF--

THIRD PARTY THING THAT I AIN'T

REALLY WITH.

>> I GOT A GIFT FOR YOU TOO,

BABE.

AND I THINK IT'S RIGHT IN LINE

WITH WHAT YOU'RE INTO RIGHT NOW.

>> I MIGHT GET WHAT I'VE BEEN

WANTING.

A ROLEX OR SOMETHING.

[laughter]

>> JESUS.

>> YEAH.

>> JIMMY'S ON MY BACK ABOUT

BUYING HIM A WATCH

FOR HIS BIRTHDAY,

BUT HE HAS TONS OF WATCHES.

SO I FIGURED I'D GET CREATIVE

AND GET HIM SOMETHING

A LITTLE DIFFERENT.

>> YOU KNOW THIS GUY KILLED

MAD PEOPLE, RIGHT?

>> THAT'S DAVID AND GOLIATH.

THAT'S DAVID FROM...

>> HE KILLED ONE DUDE.

>> HE KILLED GOLIATH.

THEN, HE RAN A REGIME

AND KILLED EVERYBODY AFTER THAT.

>> WHAT THE [bleep] IS THIS?

I WASN'T LOOKING FOR THAT.

AND I WASN'T LOOKING FOR

THE JOKES EITHER.

WHAT I'M DOING WITH THIS?

>> YOU'RE PUTTING IT IN

YOUR GARDEN.

>> THIS WAS NOT THE TYPE OF HEAD

I WAS TALKING ABOUT.

>> OH!

>> IT'S SUPPOSED TO SYMBOLIZE

WHAT?

>> YES!

>> ME AGAINST THE WORLD?

>> YOU KILL THE GIANTS, BABY.

NO MATTER--NO MATTER HOW THEY

VIEW YOU, YOU CAN TAKE DOWN

THE GIANTS.

>> I WAS LOOKING FOR SOMETHING

THAT TICKED, YOU KNOW WHAT

I MEAN?

SOMETHING THAT TICKTOCK.

>> DADDY.

>> WHAT?

>> MY PRESENT IS GONNA TEACH YOU

HOW TO SWIM.

>> YOU'RE GOING TO TEACH ME

HOW TO SWIM?

>> YEAH, 'CAUSE REMEMBER YOU

DON'T KNOW HOW TO SWIM?

>> I--I CAN SWIM A LITTLE BIT.

>> OH, YEAH, A LITTLE BIT.

>> TODAY IN THIS POOL?

>> NO, THAT POOL IS WAY

TOO SMALL.

WELL, I SWAM WITH HIM.

YEAH, BUT HE'S NOT, LIKE,

ON MY LEVEL.

[yelling]

DADDY, STOP!

>> OH, [bleep].

>> [yelling]

[laughter]

>> YOU KNOW THAT THESE AREN'T

OURS TO KEEP.

I'M PULLING THEM.

>> OH, LIKE HELL.

>> SO YOU THINK I'M JUST GONNA

BUY YOU OLD VERSACE DRESSES?

I GOT YOU SOMETHING THAT I

THOUGHT YOU WOULD REALLY LIKE.

>> OH, [bleep].

YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?

I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS [bleep]

FOR.

>> SO YOU DON'T DROWN.

>> CHRISSY, YOU KNOW,

SHE'S VERY GOOD IN STYLING.

I LOVE HER DRESSING.

HER DRESSING IS JUST A LITTLE

DIFFERENT FROM MINE.

I HOPE--JUST HOPE CHRISSY

UNDERSTANDS THAT, YOU KNOW,

I JUST LOVE TO BE SEXY.

>> THIS LOOKS LIKE IT WAS FUN.

>> OOH.

>> YEAH.

THIS IS BUSY, BUT NICE.

>> YOU DON'T SEE ME WITH, LIKE,

A NICE PAIR HIGH GLOVES.

>> YOU DON'T WANT TO HAVE

TOO MUCH GOING ON.

>> I'M ALREADY TOO MUCH

GOING ON.

>> EXACTLY, SO YOU NEED TO BE IN

A BLACK STRAITJACKET--

I MEAN, A BLACK DRESS.

>> [laughing] YOU SAID

STRAITJACKET.

OH!

[laughing]

>> SHE ASKED ME TO STYLE HER

FOR THE BOOK COVER.

HOPEFULLY I CAN FIND SOMETHING

SHE LIKES.

JUST NEVER KNOW WITH NANCY.

YOU KNOW THAT THESE AREN'T OURS

TO KEEP?

I'M PULLING THEM.

SO THEY'RE GONNA...

>> OH, LIKE HELL.

I DON'T PLAY-PLAY...

>> THE STORE IS GOING TO LEND

THEM TO ME FOR YOUR SHOOT.

YOU HAVE TO BE RESPONSIBLE.

>> I DON'T--I DON'T DO THE

PLAY-PLAY, THAT PLAY-PLAY

[bleep].

>> SO YOU THINK I'M JUST GONNA

BUY YOU OLD VERSACE DRESSES?

>> I'LL CALL JOMO.

WE'RE CALLING ON YOUR...

>> LET'S CROSS THIS BRIDGE

FIRST.

>> OKAY.

>> NANCY CAN TURN INTO

A FIVE-YEAR-OLD ON YOU

REALLY QUICKLY.

LIKE A TANTRUM-THROWING,

HARD-HEADED,

REBELLIOUS FIVE-YEAR-OLD

WITH A LOT OF CURSE WORDS.

>> OKAY, CHRISSY,

WHAT'S HAPPENING HERE?

FOR REAL, FOR REAL?

YOU KNOW THIS IS [bleep], RIGHT?

>> WHAT? THAT'S A GREAT DRESS.

IT HAS GREAT LINES.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

>> OOH.

>> YOU SEE? YOU SEE?

>> I'M SHOWING OFF MY...

>> OOH.

>> THEY HAVE TO WORK LIKE THIS.

IN THIS DRESS, HERE,

I CAN DO--AH!

>> WERE YOU TWERKING JUST NOW?

>> DOESN'T THIS LOOK NICE,

YOU KNOW, LIKE, MM-MM-MM.

>> IT DOES LOOK NICE.

>> OKAY, I GOT TO GET THIS

DRESS.

THIS ONE HERE IS TO BUY, TO GO.

DEFINITELY HAVE TO MAKE SURE

THAT SHE MAKE JIM BUY THAT

DRESS, 'CAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT?

CHRISTMAS IS RIGHT AROUND THE

CORNER, AND I LIKE MY CHRISTMAS

GIFTS EARLY.

>> CHRISSY.

>> JOMO.

YOU KNOW--YOU KNOW CHRISSY IS

STYLING ME?

I WANT TO KNOW, IF, UM,

I CAN GET THIS DRESS?

$875.

>> 800 AND WHAT?

[laughter]

>> NO, I'M TRYING TO MAKE SENSE

OF IT ALL, BABE.

THAT'S IT.

OKAY, WE HAD A DISCONNECTION.

OKAY, TIME TO GO.

IN HER MIND, SHE EQUATES STYLING

WITH KEEPING STUFF.

IT JUST DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY,

UNLESS SHE WANTS TO PAY FOR IT,

'CAUSE I'M NOT.

LISTEN, I'M STAYING POSITIVE.

I'M LEARNING HOW TO SURVIVE...

>> NO, YOU GOT TO WORK WITH ME.

>> WITHIN THE WORKINGS OF

THE JONES FAMILY.

>> YOU GOT TO WORK WITH ME.

CHRISSY DISAPPOINTED ME.

I REALLY THOUGHT SHE WAS GONNA

HELP ME GET THAT DRESS.

I'M A SPOILED BRAT.

MY SON WILL GET IT FOR ME

ANYWAY.

>> DON'T THROW A TANTRUM.

LET'S GO.

[doorbell rings]

>> YOU GONNA ASK THE PRINCE

CAN YOU USE HIS POOL?

>> YES, SIR.

WHAT'S GOING ON, BUDDY?

>> TODAY, I'M TEACHING MY DAD

HOW TO SWIM IN HIS FRIEND'S

POOL.

IN CAMP, THEY'RE TEACHING US HOW

TO SWIM A LOT,

SO I WANTED TO SHOW HIM HOW GOOD

I COULD SWIM.

>> SO HOW MUCH SWIMMING DO YOU

DO AT THIS CAMP?

>> THREE TIMES A DAY

FOR AN HOUR.

>> YOU SWIM THREE TIMES A DAY?

Y'ALL SWIMMING IN THAT LAKE

THAT'S UP THERE TOO?

>> YEAH.

AND THERE'S FISH AND TURTLES

IN THERE.

>> YOU DON'T GET NERVOUS

SOMETHING'S GONNA BITE YOU?

>> MM-MM.

>> YEAH?

>> CAN WE GET IN NOW?

>> YEAH, LET'S DO IT.

I'M NOT AN ANIMAL PERSON

LIKE THAT.

LIKE, I'M NOT, LIKE, THE BIGGEST

ANIMAL PERSON, AND I'M NOT

REALLY WITH SWIMMING WITH FISHES

AND [bleep] LIKE THAT.

>> I CALL THIS ONE

SPIDER-MAN.

>> SPIDER-MAN?

>> [yelps]

splash!

>> IN THE SHALLOW END,

HE'S MORE COMFORTABLE 'CAUSE

HE CAN STAND UP.

SO I'M TEACHING HIM HOW YOU CAN

BE COMFORTABLE IN THE DEEP END.

>> I WANT TO LEARN HOW TO SWIM.

>> THE FIRST THING WE CAN WORK

ON IS KICKING.

[water splashing]

>> IF I KICK, I CAN'T EVEN STAND

UP, THOUGH.

I'M SINKING OFF THE KICK.

I'M TRYING TO TELL YOU

MY KICK GAME AIN'T PROLIFIC.

HOW YOU BREATHE?

>> TRY KEEPING YOUR EAR

IN THE WATER.

AND THEN--

[breathes in]

>> YOUR HEAD SUPPOSED TO BE

GOING THE SAME WAY YOUR ARMS

GOING?

>> YEAH, AND I JUST GO

ONE, TWO, THREE.

ONE, TWO, THREE.

>> I CAN'T DO THE BREATHING

PART, MAN.

SOME ON, LET ME SEE YOU DO

THE BREASTSTROKE.

>> [breathes in]

[water splashing]

I'M DEFINITELY PROUD OF HIM FOR

TAKING ADVANTAGE OF THE CAMP.

WATCHING HIM SWIM

AND ACTUALLY HAVING THE

KNOWLEDGE OF TEACHING ME HOW

TO SWIM IS A WHOLE NOTHER

EXPERIENCE, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU

KNOW THAT YOU'RE NOT WASTING

YOUR MONEY.

LIKE, THAT'S EVEN BETTER.

>> [gasps]

>> YEAH.

[claps]

I'M HYPED.

WE GOT TO GO TO MIAMI, MAN.

DEFINITELY.

>> [laughs]

[yelps]

>> HOW'D YOUR BIRTHDAY GO?

>> BIRTHDAY WAS COOL.

I HAD FUN.

>> DID YOU GET ALL THE GIFTS

YOU WANTED?

>> NO.

>> I FIGURED YOU DIDN'T REALLY

APPRECIATE THE STATUE,

SO I GOT YOU SOMETHING THAT I

THOUGHT YOU WOULD REALLY LIKE.

>> I THINK I WANTED THE WATCH

WHEN I SEEN HER ACTUALLY GET

THE SAME ONE FOR HER BIRTHDAY.

I FIGURED SHE COULD RETURN

THE FAVOR ON MY BIRTHDAY.

I'M KIND OF FEELING LIKE

I MIGHT GET WHAT I'VE BEEN

WANTING, SO, YOU KNOW,

I'M A LITTLE BIT HYPED.

OH, [bleep].

YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?

THESE [bleep] CAN'T EVEN FIT ME,

MAN.

>> ARE YOU HAPPY WITH THEM?

>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE [bleep]

THEY'RE FOR.

>> SO YOU DON'T DROWN WHEN

YOU GO SWIMMING.

>> [laughs]

I'M FROM THE PROJECTS, MAN.

WE CAN DO ANYTHING.

>> OKAY.

>> SURVIVAL.

>> OKAY.

>> SURVIVAL.

WHERE MY GIFT AT?

>> I GOT YOU A GREAT GIFT, BABE.

I PROMISE.

>> IF CHRISSY DOESN'T GET ME

A GOOD PRESENT, THIS COULD BE

DISASTROUS FOR THE YEARS TO COME

FOR HER.

THERE'S A LOT OF DIFFERENT

HOLIDAYS THAT FEMALES EXPECT

GIFTS ON,

AND I MIGHT JUST BE ASLEEP ON,

LIKE, THREE OF THEM.

>> SO I WENT SHOPPING WITH

YOUR MOM.

>> SO I THOUGHT YOU SAID STYLING

WASN'T FOR YOU.

>> IT USED TO BE, AND I'M GLAD

TO HELP YOUR MOM OUT,

BUT THAT'S, YOU KNOW, I--I--

LIKE TO BE DOING MUCH BIGGER

THINGS.

>> YOU GOT A PASSION FOR

SOMETHING RIGHT NOW?

YOU GOT SOMETHING THAT YOU'RE

GOING TO JUMP INTO?

>> YEAH, THERE'S A FEW THINGS.

I'M GOOD AT A LOT OF STUFF.

I JUST DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE

TO GRASP ON TO.

IT'S TIME FOR ME TO BE

RESPONSIBLE FOR SOMETHING,

FROM INCEPTION TO COMPLETION

ON MY OWN.

I THINK THE PROBLEM WITH ME IS

I DON'T FIND THE TYPE OF PEOPLE

THAT MOTIVATE ME BECAUSE I DON'T

FEEL LIKE THEY GET ME WHEN I SIT

DOWN AND HAVE A CONVERSATION

WITH THEM.

I DON'T FEEL LIKE THEY KNOW--

>> WELL, WHAT WOULD THE PERSON

TO MOTIVATE YOU BE?

>> HAVE TO BE CUT FROM SOMEWHAT

THE SAME CLOTH.

>> MAYBE YOU SHOULD SPEAK

TO DEB.

>> I THINK I DO WANT TO TALK

TO DEB.

DEB'S BEEN WORKING ON SOME

PROJECTS WITH JIMMY FOR A MINUTE

NOW.

I HEAR CONVERSATIONS THAT

JIM HAS WITH DEB, AND SHE'S

ALWAYS BRINGING GOOD IDEAS

TO THE TABLE, AND, YOU KNOW,

SHE GETS THINGS DONE.

SHE'S SOMEBODY THAT CAN HELP ME,

MOTIVATE ME, IF NOTHING ELSE.

>> YOU PAY FOR MY PORTION

OF THE BILL.

>> WE GOING DUTCH?

>> YOU PAY FOR YOUR PORTION.

>> MM-HMM.

>> AND PUT A TIP WITH IT.

>> DO I LOOK LIKE THE TYPE

OF GIRL THAT GOES DUTCH?

>> [laughing]

>> YOU'RE GOOFY.

>> I'MA LEAVE YOU ALONE.

I'M OUT OF HERE.

>> DEUCES.

>> GIVE ME, LIKE, SEXY,

SEDUCTIVE.

>> OH.

I THINK THAT WE SHOULD FIND

THE STUFF THAT I PULLED FOR YOU,

BECAUSE I'M KIND OF CONFUSED.

>> THE MORE PEOPLE SAY--WHAT IS

CHRISSY DOING NOW?

WHERE'S CHRISSY AT?

LIKE, CHRISSY KEEPS HIDING.

GUESS WHAT, NO MORE HIDING.

>> HEATHER, THIS IS CHRISSY.

CHRISSY, THIS IS HEATHER.

>> HELLO.

>> HI.

>> HOW ARE YOU?

>> NICE TO MEET YOU.

>> HEATHER HUNTER WAS DEFINITELY

THE PERFECT PHOTOGRAPHER FOR

THE COVER OF MY SEX BOOK.

YOU KNOW, SHE WAS THAT

PORN STAR,

AND LOOK AT HOW--SHE GOT THAT

EYE FOR THE SEXY LOOK AND

EVERYTHING FOR ME.

THIS IS WHAT I'M GONNA WEAR.

>> MOMMY, I THINK THAT WE SHOULD

FIND THE STUFF THAT I PULLED

FOR YOU, BECAUSE I'M KIND OF

CONFUSED.

>> I KNEW YOU LIKED YOUR LITTLE

SET.

I ACTUALLY BOUGHT THIS AND I'M

JUST STUCK WITH THE OTHER ONE,

THE OTHER STUFF I LEFT

BY ACCIDENT.

>> ON ACCIDENT?

>> ACCIDENT.

IF IT WASN'T SEXY ENOUGH FOR ME,

I'M TELLING YOU IT'S BY

ACCIDENT.

[laughs]

>> THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT

SHOOT.

IT'S FOR THE COVER OF YOUR BOOK.

I DON'T THINK YOU WANT TO DO

THAT FOR THE COVER OF YOUR BOOK.

>> MY BOOK HAD TO BE SEXY,

LIKE THE WORD "PUMKASH."

SEXY.

>> THAT'S HOT.

>> SHE WANTED A COSTUME,

'CAUSE THAT'S ALL THAT WAS ON

THAT RACK.

AND I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER.

YOU GOT A BOOTY POP RIGHT NOW?

HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY.

>> ♪ TELL ME, TELL ME

♪ HOW YOU TIGHT UP SKIRT

♪ SHOW ME HOW YOU GOING

♪ IN YOUR TIGHT UP SKIRT

♪ WHY DON'T I SHOW YOU ♪

♪ HOW TO WEAR IT

♪ WHY DON'T I SHOW YOU ♪

♪ HOW TO WEAR IT

♪ TELL ME HOW YOU'RE GOING IN ♪

♪ A TIGHT UP SKIRT

♪ ME IN A TIGHT UP SKIRT

>> I'M SAYING TO MYSELF,

CHRISSY, YOU REALLY NEED TO GO

AHEAD AND SIT DOWN AND TALK TO

DEB AND FIGURE THIS OUT,

'CAUSE WHAT ARE YOU DOING

RIGHT NOW?

>> HMM, I THINK TANGO MIGHT BE

SMELLING SOME OF THAT PUMKASH.

[laughter]

THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME

OUT TO COME SIT WITH ME.

>> I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW,

'CAUSE I'VE BEEN UP ALL NIGHT,

I'M MORE RASPY NOW THAN EVER.

>> EVER.

[laughs]

I RELATE TO DEB BECAUSE WE'RE

KIND OF CUT FROM THE SAME CLOTH.

I FEEL LIKE I'M TALKING TO A

REAL PERSON WHEN I TALK TO HER.

I FEEL LIKE SHE GETS ME.

I'M HOPING TO WALK AWAY

WITH INSPIRATION.

THE OTHER MORNING, I WAS TALKING

TO JIMMY ABOUT, YOU KNOW,

GETTING THINGS STARTED FOR

MYSELF.

BUT, I'M READY TO WORK ON ME.

I FEEL THAT I HAVE TO HAVE

THAT MINDSET,

THAT IT'S TIME TO CHASE IT FOR

MYSELF.

I DIMMED MY LIGHT TO FIT IN,

AND NOW I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TURN

THE [bleep] BACK ON.

>> WE GOT TO BUST THE LIGHT.

>> OKAY.

>> WE'RE BUSTING THE DAMN LIGHT.

>> [laughs]

>> WE'RE BUSTING THE LIGHT,

AND THAT'S IT.

WELL, YOU KNOW, PEOPLE SAY,

"WHAT IS CHRISSY DOING NOW?

WHERE'S CHRISSY AT?"

AND CHRISSY KEEPS HIDING.

BUT GUESS WHAT, NO MORE HIDING.

LET'S TALK ABOUT THE FASHION.

DEFINITELY WANT TO TALK ABOUT

CHRISSY'S LIFE...

>> MM-HMM.

>> LIKE, REALLY CHRISSY

COMPLETING...

>> A PROJECT, RIGHT?

>> COMPLETING A PROJECT.

>> I REALIZE THAT.

NOT THAT PEOPLE, YOU KNOW, DON'T

HAVE GOOD INTENTIONS, BUT LIFE

HAPPENS, THINGS GET IN THE WAY,

AND I KNOW THAT IF I PUT THAT

FULL RESPONSIBILITY ON MYSELF

AND SOLELY ON MYSELF AS FAR AS

MAKING A DECISION TO DO IT,

IT'LL GET DONE,

ESPECIALLY WITH YOU HELPING ME.

>> IT IS VERY, VERY IMPORTANT

THAT CHRISSY STARTS SETTING UP

HER OWN LANE.

CHRISSY NEEDS TO COMPLETE

SOMETHING FOR CHRISSY.

ONCE THAT HAPPENS,

CHRISSY JUST GOT HER MOJO BACK.

YOU CAN'T ALLOW NOTHING TO LIVE

IN YOUR HEAD RENT-FREE.

IT AIN'T PAYING YOU, IT DON'T

STAY THERE.

JUST AS SIMPLE AS THAT.

THAT'S REAL TALK.

THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT

EVERY SINGLE DAY.

THAT'S YOUR TESTIMONY.

BOTTOM LINE.

YOU'RE VERY STRONG, BEAUTIFUL

WOMAN, AND I THINK CHRISSY

SHOULD STEP UP TO THAT PLATE

AND LET PEOPLE SEE WHO CHRISSY

IS.

NO MORE HIDING.

>> I'M NOT HIDING.

I'M JUST--I FEEL LIKE I'M

BETTER AT HELPING OTHER PEOPLE.

>> NO MORE HIDING.

>> OKAY.

>> NO MORE PROCRASTINATION.

>> OKAY.

>> NO MORE EXCUSES,

BUT CHRISSY DOING CHRISSY.

DON'T MAKE ME CRY, CHRISSY,

'CAUSE WE'RE NOT GONNA GO

THROUGH THIS SENTIMENTAL THING.

>> I DON'T REALLY LIKE TO ASK

FOR HELP.

OR MAYBE I DON'T KNOW HOW TO

RECEIVE IT.

I DON'T KNOW.

IT'S GOOD TO KNOW THAT SHE GETS

ME ENOUGH TO SEE THAT MAYBE

I WON'T ASK, BUT I NEED IT.

>> VERY HARD TO ASK FOR HELP,

SO YOU JUST TOOK YOUR

FIRST STEP.

SECOND STEP, YOU'RE HERE.

THIRD STEP, WE'RE GOING IN.

WE'RE OFF TO THE RACES.

>> I'M SCARED, BUT LET'S GO.

>> YOU AIN'T SCARED.

>> [laughs]

I HAVE ANOTHER GIFT FOR YOU.

>> I'M READY.

[laughter]

>> THAT'S A BEAUTIFUL LADY

RIGHT THERE.

>> ♪ TELL ME, TELL ME, TELL ME

♪ IN A TIGHT UP SKIRT

♪ TELL ME HOW YOU GET UP

♪ IN A TIGHT UP SKIRT

>> JIMMY'S BIRTHDAY WEEK IS

COMING TO A CLOSE.

I GOT HIM A COUPLE MORE GIFTS

THAT I THINK HE'S REALLY GONNA

LIKE.

I HAVE ANOTHER GIFT FOR YOU.

>> I'M READY.

>> OKAY.

>> [laughs] YO.

WHAT THE [bleep] IS THIS?

>> LOOK AT IT.

[laughter]

>> I'M NOT LOOKING FOR A PICTURE

OF MOTHER; I'M LOOKING FOR A BOX

WITH A WATCH IN IT.

>> I WAS GONNA FRAME IT,

BUT THEN--HEY!

>> FRAME THIS.

>> OH, SO YOU DIDN'T LIKE

THE MUSCLE-BOUND GUY IN IT?

>> BOZO.

FRAME THAT.

THAT'S A BEAUTIFUL LADY

RIGHT THERE.

YEAH, I DON'T PLAY WITH YOU

ON YOUR BIRTHDAY WEEK

WHEN IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GET

A GIFT, WHENEVER YOU CRY

FOR HALF THE YEAR ABOUT THE GIFT

THAT YOU WANT--

I DON'T PLAY WITH YOU...

>> BLAH, BLAH.

ALL YOU--THAT'S ALL I HEAR

RIGHT NOW, OKAY?

>> ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

>> IT'S A BUNCH OF SAD RAPPING.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU BIG, SPOILED

BABY.

>> MM. LET ME SEE THIS.

>> NO, NO.

YOU HAVE TO TAKE HER BACK ON

YOUR SIDE THOUGH.

>> IT JUST FEELS GOOD TO KNOW

THAT YOUR LADY LOVES YOU THE WAY

THAT MY LADY LOVES ME.

YOU HEARD?

THANK YOU, BABY.

>> YOU'RE SQUISHING UP YOUR

MOTHER'S PICTURE.

>> I'LL PUT IT DOWN HERE FOR

A MINUTE.

>> [laughs]

YOU'RE A PIECE OF [bleep].

NOW THAT YOU GOT YOUR WATCH,

NOW SHE CAN GO.

>> I'M ONLY PUT HER DOWN THERE

FOR A MINUTE.

>> CAN YOU KEEP YOUR HANDS

UP THIS WAY, THOUGH?

>> NEXT TIME ON CHRISSY

AND MR. JONES...

>> WHAT YOU DOING?

>> DEB IS TAKING ME ON.

>> WHY TO DEB?

>> TO DEB, YES.

>> YOUR PERSONALITY AND DEB'S

PERSONALITY HAVE MESHED WELL?

>> IT WORKS.

>> UNCLE SHAWN IS STARTING TO

DESIGN A KID'S LINE

FOR VAMPIRE LIFE.

IF YOU START WITH $59 IN

INVESTMENTS, THAT COULD BE

FOR 50% OF THE BUSINESS.

>> [sighs]

>> COME, COME.

LET'S GET THE BOOK.

LET'S GET THE BOOK.

MAMA JONES TELLING YOU ABOUT

LOVE AND ROMANCE.