Tour Survival Guide: Fiction Plane

by (@katespencer)

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Now and then our Tour Survival Guide will check in with rockers about life on the road. Here’s Fiction Plane‘s lead singer Joe Sumner, currently on tour with the Police, on buccaneering, Wendy’s and Dave Navarro

Jack Sparrow Envy
We [asked for] plastic swords and eye patches for acting like pirates. We put on our eye patches, brandished our swords and went around going "Arrrr!" I kept hold of the sword for a few days. We’ve only gotten them once — it happened in Vancouver. They?ve got no problem providing you with fifty bottles of Jack Daniels if you want it, but plastic swords, they?re like, "No! You?ll get it once. Then suffer in swordlessness."

Like Swimming, No Eating Two Hours Before Playing
We had traveled from Ohio to Wisconsin. There was terrible traffic and we didn?t have time to get any food, so right at the last minute we got Wendy burgers and stuffed them into our faces. It didn?t feel good. I?ve got a two-hour rule now. I think I cramped up at one point. No eating two hours before, even if I?m hungry.

Dave Navarro’s Nipple-Ringed Oddness
When we were making our album, Dave Navarro came into our studio [in LA], plugged his guitar into one of our amps, played it for like four minutes, stubbed out a cigarette on the floor and left. Didn?t say anything. That was pretty weird.

Just Because You’re Sting’s Son…
We?re like head lice on this tour. We?re just little parasitic beings. They?re not really allowing us to bring any of our minions. A lot of bands that are not big bands, they just don?t allow girlfriends on the road. I understand why you do it, but it would be so much easier if you let people have their girlfriends and a proper life, rather than slugging it out in a testosterone filled hell hole.

Tour Dates
6/26 Dallas, TX – American Airlines Center
6/30 New Orleans, LA – New Orleans Arena
7/2 St. Louis, MO – Scottrade Center
7/22 Toronto, ON – Air Canada Centre
7/25 Montreal, PQ – Bell Centre
7/28 Boston, MA – Fenway Park
8/1 New York, NY – Madison Square Garden
8/3 New York, NY – Madison Square Garden

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