Britney’s Worst Year Ever: March

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You were there through the bad driving, the head-shaving, and the Criss Angel thing. It’s been a tough year for our girl. No one could have imagined a mere 12 months ago that she’d create such glorious new nonsense every week. Some of the craziness escapes you? Come back every day: We’re counting down the events that made up the Year in Britney.

March 5Anarchy in the R.C. – A little thing like rehab wasn’t going to stop the amazing stories about Britney from coming. In what might be the most deliciously ridiculous tale to be told about Britney this year (though, to be fair, that Chinese-twins adoption thing may take the cake), our anti-hero is said to have scrawled 666 on her head, screamed, “I am the Antichrist!” and then attempted to hang herself. Lucky for an Earth full of voyeurs, she was not successful. [Softpedia]

March 15Coke Addict – Even more highly unlikely, but-wouldn’t-that-be-awesome-if-it-were-true yarn emerged (can you tell how bored the press was during the 30 days Brit was away?): Star reported that Britney had a 24-can-a-day Coke habit. For the caffeine buzz that would give you, the 3,300 calories would be but a small price to pay, no? The other part of the rag’s story is that Britney was a raving diva in rehab. That part wasn’t so hard to believe. [Star]

March 21Free at Last! – Britney left rehab and leaped right back into our arms. Or maybe it just seemed that way. Her to-be-ex-manager Larry Rudolph issued a statement, claiming that Britney had “been released by the Promises Malibu Treatment Center after successfully completing their program.” As the remaining nine months of 2007 would teach us, “successfully” is a relative term. [People]

[Image source: X17]