A-Rod In Love: Madonna’s My Soulmate!

by (@katespencer)

Poor Alex Rodriguez. He should have known what he was messing with when he fell in love with Madonna. This is a chick who married Sean Penn when she was like, 12! You don’t fall in love with Madonna. She chews you up and spits you out, and your remains become art. But the Yankee slugger doesn’t give a sh*t, telling his teammate (Please let it be Jason Giambi‘s moustache) that he’s in love with the singer and that Madonna is ?my (bleeping) soulmate, dude.?

Oh A-Rod, get over yourself. Madonna has a soulmate, and it’s herself.

Hungry for today’s latest on the A-Rod scandal? Here’s the scoop:

  • Lenny Kravitz was told by his manager (and Madonna’s) that he was going to “pimp out Madonna and A-Rod.” He disapproved and fired the guy, and then he ended up linked to A-Rod’s wife. Lenny’s pissed, naturally.
  • A-Rod boned a lot of chicks while he was married, and a few are enjoying their .000015 seconds of fame.
  • Madonna wants Cynthia Rodriguez’s lawyers to stop using her name. Really? How Lucky! Can we also stop talking about the Artist Formerly Known As Attention Whore?
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