ROOT

by (@katespencer)

Suge Knight’s L.A. Ass Whooping

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Hey look – Suge Knight is still around doing what he does best – getting into trouble. The former hip-hop mogul allegedly got his ass kicked outside a Los Angeles nightclub this weekend, after he charged at some duding screaming “I want my money!” Suge grabbed him in a headlock, but the guy slipped out and clocked the Death Row founder in the face. Apparently Knight was on the ground for three minutes before he could walk away from the scene and headed to the hospital with the LAPD. TMZ has pics of Suge covered in blood, taken right after sh*t went down. He later refused to press charges against the guy, but if I were the culprit I’d look out. Suge wants his money, and knowing him, he’ll get it. [NYDN]

by (@katespencer)

Beyonce’s Kid Clothes Perfect for Trashy Tots

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Here’s the latest in clothes for girls from Beyonce and her mother’s fashion line, House of Dereon. These threads are definitely going to be a hit, as there’s certainly not a lot of heels or boas out there on the market for four year olds. Aren’t all moms out there desperate for a way to skank up their tots, Pussycat Dolls style? I think so!

So go ahead youngin’s – grab that leopard print had, slip into your heels and that sexy denim outfit, and jam it out that piano you don’t yet know how to play. You look so damn hot, no one will even notice. [DListed]

by (@katespencer)

Gossip Break: Nicole’s a Hot Mama

nicole-richie-2.jpgNicole Richie is gracing the pages of Harper’s with her baby girl, barefoot boyfriend, and dad (clad in an ironic t-shirt). Pretty. [Harper's Bazaar]

Paris Hilton wants to be a mommy and is off to great start by comparing kids to her pets. [Seriously? OMG!]

Has Ciara moved on from Fiddy with a new man? [YBF]

Kimora and Russell are still having divorce drama, after she tried to block him from obtaining joint custody of their two tots. [Crunk+Disorderly]

After being released from jail, Amy Winehouse hit the town looking like a cracked out extra from Grease. [I'm Not Obsessed]

Fergie almost falls down and twists her ankle while leaving the Waverly Inn. It’s tumblicious. [CelebSlam]

Britney and K-Fed practice safe sex and do it over the phone. Still gross! [IDLYITW]

Katherine Heigl thinks she’s too good for Grey’s Anatomy and wants out of her contract, so she can continue making movies for my grandmother. [DListed]

Nick Cannon‘s wedding ring has arrived in NYC! Oh, and so has Nick. [Just Jared]

Rihanna and Chris get turned on by bucket of fried chicken, make out in a KFC. [ConcreteLoop]

by (@katespencer)

Boob Watch: Stare & See if Ash is Preggers

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You know how you know when someone is pregnant? When they tell you (or ya know, when they pop a baby out after nine months). But of course the NY Daily News can’t stop speculating about what’s going on in Ashlee Simpson‘s still-flat belly, so they’ve moved north to her breasts. “Possibly pregnant Ashlee Simpson did little to squash baby rumors when she recently flaunted a chest that could rival her big sis Jessica’s,” the rag gushed today.

Her rep chalked it up to a “great bra,” but we chalk it up to serious desperation on behalf of the newspaper. Next time do a little research – her boobs looked bigger in 2007! [Sidenote: Ash is rumored to be getting married to Pete Wentz next week - we can't wait to analyze her wedding dress breasts.]

by (@katespencer)

Shouldn’t Brit Look This Good Every Day?

Hey Britney,

Listen up. You look REALLY good in this video clip from your second stint on How I Met Your Mother. We’re talking pre-Federline good. Now that’s something! So could you please hire whoever is styling you on set and bring them home to your Beverly Hills lair and pay them loads of cash to help you look this good as you parade to the dance studio everyday? Trust us – this is the best advice you’ve gotten since your parents told you to get rid of Sam Lutfi, and your hair will look infinitely better than it does now.

Please?

by (@katespencer)

Lohan’s New Song: Listen at Your Own Risk

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We have no idea why LiLo continues to insist on having a singing career. It’s not like she’s actually very good at singing, nor does she have any fans. So basically the whole thing is glorified karaoke, done solely to massage Lindsay’s ego. Fine. But couldn’t she have at least picked a better song to drop from her new album? Listen to her new track “Bossy” and let us know if you’re down with the tune or think it’s rough on the ears. Ne-Yo wrote the track, and described it as “a song for Lindsay Lohan that people were gonna take seriously.”Seriously? We think not.

by (@katespencer)

Gossip Break: Wino Wants to Go to Jail

wino.jpgWhoops, Wino did it again. That crack habit just keeps getting her in trouble with the police. [DListed]

Kelly Osbourne looks really hot when she’s plastered and unable to walk. [Seriously? OMG!]

Christina Milian says Nick Cannon‘s a big ol’ cheater. [I'mNotObsessed]

Madonna brought a female fan on-stage last night and kissed her, which is like the tamest thing she’s done in years. Not shocked! [CelebSlam]

Britney wore a dress from 2001 to Jamie-Lynn‘s baby shower. But at least she’s smiling! [ICYDK]

Barbara Walters and Star Jones are feuding; and no one under 80 cares. [Us]

by (@katespencer)

Mimi’s “Mrs. Cannon” Tattoo Scares Oprah

Oprah loves to talk, so today she’s blabbing all about Mariah and Nick‘s wedding on her show. O even snagged some wedding pics for us to peep and reveals that Mariah got a “Mrs. Cannon” tat on her back before they were married. Spontaneous indeed! It’s rumored that Mimi might show up on the show today to dish her own dirt, but until then here’s a clip of the chatter, featuring our fave gal pal Gayle King, as well as famous spouses Mark Consuelos (married to Kelly Ripa) and Alexandra Wentworth (who calls George Stephanopoulos her hubby).

by (@katespencer)

Dina Lohan Wins “Screwing Up Kids” Award

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Let’s start by saying congrats to Dina Lohan for winning the “Long Island Top Mom” award last night, and follow with a hearty WTF to the people that nominated her.

TOP MOM and Dina Lohan in the same sentence?

Words truly escape us. Dina seems to think she deserved the award (she showed up with her 82-year old mom in tow) and claimed to gawking photogs that she’s never partied with her mini-me Lindsay, ever. Note to Dina – getting hammered with your kid counts as partying! MamaLo also offered up this tidbit of advice that she often provides Lindsay – moms aspiring to destroy their tots with reality show work and rehab should pay attention! “Just to be honest and to stay morally correct,” she said. “And listen to your mother.” [Newsday]

by (@katespencer)

Mimi Wore White at Her Wedding

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There she is, our beautiful, spontaneous bride. We must admit, we’re WAY more into her recent wedding outfit than the contraption she wore when she walked down the aisle in 1993 with Tommy Mottola. Peoples got the inside scoop on the nuptials, and Mimi told the mag that she and Nick “are soulmates. ” I never felt a love like this was in the cards for me,” she elaborated.

From the looks of things in that bottom pic at the beach, it looks like they are definitely “mates” of some kind. Congrats Mariah and Nick! Or should we call you Marick?