ROOT

by (@katespencer)

Another Day, Another Oompa Loompa Rescued by Paris Hilton

paris-121007.jpgJust a typical day in the life of Paris Hilton! At a performance in Miami this weekend, a rowdy crowd shoved performer Robin Sherwood (dressed as one of Willy Wonka’s Oompa Loompas) so hard that he sliced his leg open on a metal part of the stage support. But never fear! It’s a bird! It’s a skanky heiress! It’s…Paris Hilton? Yes, the waste of space in a fancy dress “rescued” the fallen little man like the hero that she is! A witness revealed, “Paris screamed for help and jumped up to move everyone away from him. She held Robin’s hand and said the sweetest things to keep him calm. She stayed with him until he was safely in the ambulance on his way to the hospital.”

Sherwood ended up getting 50 stitches and is recovering – thank goodness he’ll be okay and credit has been given where credit is due. Paris deserves some sort of award for her life-saving skills and selfless behavior. Then she can resume her mission of rescuing imaginary elf-like creatures across the globe! [NYDN. Image: Getty]

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Zep Tears Sh!t Up in London

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Yep, it happened last night. The ’70s kingpins Led Zeppelin reunited to celebrate their music biz pal Ahmet Ertegun and tickle a global fanbase that remains fervent four decades after the band first began. The set list ranged from “Rock and Roll” to “No Quarter” to “Dazed and Confused.” The audience members ranged from Mick Jagger to Dave Grohl to Pink to Naomi Campbell. More reports and live clips coming in soon. Keep checking back throughout the day.

Didn’t make the show? Watch a block of Led Zeppelin videos to relieve the frustration. Don’t overlook some of their coolest tracks.

by (@katespencer)

Tuesday: Jessica’s a High Maintenance Pal

jessica-eva.jpgJessica Simpson?s Got Beef with Pal Eva
Jess is supposedly all pissed that her BFF Eva Longoria was spotted hanging with John Mayer. Bros before annoying whiny pains in the ass, right Eva? [NYP]

Madonna Stepping Up to Back Hillary
Look out Oprah, there’s a new famous lady campaigning for a Dem in town! [NYDN]

J.Lo?s Twin?s Are Already Spoiled
These mofo’s are having three different nurseries designed for them – one at each mansion. Let’s just leave it at that. [NYDN]

Britney Acts Crazy, Looks Like Crap
Hey ya’ll! Just me and my pink wig, driving around like a freak! Ya’ll should buy my album so I can afford more Frappucinos! [TMZ]

Angelina Names Shiloh the Family Outcast
Jolie calls her biological baby the family outcast because she’s looks different from her other kids. She’s just giving Shiloh that much more ammo to use against her when she turns 13. [DListed]

by (@katespencer)

Paris Hilton is Violently in Love

paris-hilton_1210.jpgIt looks like Paris DID learn something in prison – how to kick the sh*t out of another woman! The heiress apparently freaked when she discovered her on-again off-again flame, Greek shipping heir hottie Stavros Niarchos, macking on another girl in Miami last week. After noticing her man ignoring her for another woman, Paris went up to them and screamed at the unlucky lady (who happens to be her BFF Brandon Davis’ ex-girlfriend). The next night she attempted the same tactic to get Stav’s attention, but added some sexy dancing to spice up her wooing. Are we talking about humans here, or peacocks? She then followed him to another club, where she went nuts trying to get his date kicked out, and a source says she even begged security to give her the boot. Another spy claimed, “Paris was so furious, she ended up walking up to the girl and just punched her.”

The tumultuous night ended in a kiss, a classy capper to a typical instance of Hilton insanity. Perhaps they can leave Miami and take their love onto a yacht, sailing far far away from the cameras, internet, and our sensitive eyes.

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Amy’s Mum Makes A Tabloid Plea

amy_winehouseIn a desperate attempt to reach her daughter, Amy Winehouse‘s mother has written an 1,100-word open letter, asking her daughter to get help. In the plea, appearing in The News Of The World (the American equivalent of The National Enquirer), Janis Winehouse explains she felt compelled to write to her daughter after seeing pictures of Winehouse wandering the streets in the early morning hours wearing a bra and jeans.

“All I wanted to do was rush into those pictures and wrap you up in a big,warm blanket,” said Janis. With pledges of home-cooking to fatten the emaciated Winehouse up and a request for her to pick up the phone, Winehouse’s mother made no reference to her daughter’s possible drug addiction. She did, however, mention she hopes Winehouse’s recently-incarcerated husband Blake Fielder-Civil turns his life around. In the past week, Winehouse has canceled several tour dates, been photographed wandering the streets in her underwear and kept the company of one of England’s most notorious drug addicts, Pete Doherty.

by (@katespencer)

Teen Heartthrobs Tie the Knot – or Not

baio.jpgVh1′s formerly single star Scott Baio made it official with longtime love Renee Sloan on a roof-top ceremony in LA this weekend. How romantic for a guy who’s dated (and done) half of Hollywood! The ceremony was taped for the upcoming season of Scott Baio is 46…and Pregnant, so we’ll all be able to ogle at the adorableness of Chachi settling down. Half way across the country in Orlando, Florida, Backstreet Boy Howie Dorough married his longtime girlfriend in a traditional Catholic wedding. His new wife, Leigh Boniello, was the webmaster for the Boys’ site before the pair started dating six years ago. Web-dorable!

The only former teen heartthrob not getting tied down this weekend was Nick Lachey, though rumors spread all over the web thanks to Fox News claimed otherwise. While he and gal pal Vanessa Minnillo where supposedly down in the Bahamas preparing for their big day, Nick was really home in Ohio working on his new show for NBC, Clash of the Choirs. Jessica Simpson can breath easy – for now!

by (@katespencer)

Diddy and Cassie: Crazy in Love

diddy-cassie-1210.jpgSo much for Diddy getting back together with one if his baby-mammas. The rap mogul and lady lover has cut off ties with his many girls on the side and is now 100% committed to dating his prodigy Cassie. A source revealed that, ?She recently broke up with her boyfriend…They?re holed up together in Miami, very low-key. He?s really in love with her.?

The ‘Diddy and Cassie are doing it’ rumors have been swirling for a while, even though the singer denied it as late as last week. She said, “No I haven?t ever dated Diddy. I?m his artist, and we are actually friends. We really are friends. I am fortunate to have that connection with him, we just happened to have really hit it off as friends, but that?s it.”

Or is it?

by (@katespencer)

Monday: Lindsay Bounced From Hotel

lindsay-1210.jpgLindsay Banned from Hotel for Trashing Room
LiLo and her ex Riley Giles apparently wrecked a room at Malibu’s Shutters hotel, trashing the mini bar and leaving behind a bloody syringe. Wait, what about rehab? [DListed]

Ellen Still Loves her Pets
Ellen DeGeneres fights back against the Iggy backlash by rebuilding animal shelters across the country. [NYP]

Nicole Kidman Bombs Again
Tommy’s ex can’t catch a break at the box office, but at least her face looks unfazed. Thanks botox![Us]

Britney Spears Steals Lighter, Acts like an Ass
The singer stole a lighter worth $1.39 from a gas station and then sarcastically commented about it to the paps. Being insane is one thing, but being a total asshole? Lame. [TMZ]

Larry Birkhead Thinks He?s a Big Deal
Anna Nicole Smith’s ex thought he was going to be the surprise number one person on Barbara Walters’ special, “The 10 Most Fascinating People of 2007.” Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha. HAAAAA. [NYDN]

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Pop Friday: Country Soul & Troop Support

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Joss Stone & Leanne Rimes Throw Down Some Country Soul

R&B meets C&W as the two singers connect on Crossroads. They do “Super Duper Love” and others. The show airs tonight on CMT, but you can watch it at the above link now.

Five For Fighting Helps the Troops That Are Fighting

A new CD put together by John Ondrasik has an array of artists including The Fray, Goo Goo Dolls, and Josh Groban, who are giving our military some music for the holidays.