ROOT

by (@katespencer)

Britney Saves the Children (But Not Her Own)

britney-spears-1113.jpgBritney Spears and her paparazzi BFF x17 are holding an eBay auction together for the charity Unicef. The item up for bid – a Blackout CD autographed by Ms. Spears herself – currently has 96 bids and is sitting pretty at $7200. The oh-so generous singer told x17 that, “I think it?s important to give back and with the release of Blackout, this seemed like the perfect opportunity to give the fans a chance to bid on something to help children everywhere.”

That sure is a nice statement (well done, Britney’s new manager!), but we can think of two children who would really benefit from Spears’ help – her own kids. Shouldn’t she be holding an auction to raise money to get them some new teeth and maybe a nanny? Or better yet, she could just put them up for bid! Surely K-Fed’s got enough child support money horded under his bed that he could win that auction hands down. [Image: Getty]

by (@katespencer)

Tuesday: Lindsay Lends a Hand

lindsaylohan-1113.jpgPhotog Chasing Britney Hit By Car
A “spotter” who was following the pop star to the Four Seasons was hit by another paparazzo’s car and seriously injured. Welcome to the painful world of Brit Watch. [TMZ]

Lindsay Does Time at Red Cross
LiLo has started her community service working at the organization’s blood services facility. Wouldn’t it be more helpful if she just hid out for ten days? [People]

T.I. Convinced He?ll Go Free
The rapper is convinced he’ll be “exonerated” of the charges against him. That’s the spirit! [Yahoo]

Posh Ready to Pop Out Baby #4?
The Spice Mom is rumored to be pregnant with a daughter who she can prompty ruin with bad outfits and poor eating habits. [OK]

Reese & Jake Sneak Off on Vacation
The new lovers headed to Napa for some private R&R. Someone should tell them that they can cuddle all they want in LA – no one cares! [OK]

by

James Blunt Heads Out On Tour

James Blunt Headlines VH1?s You Oughta Know Tour

We’ve got yet another reason to look forward to 2008 — this February, James Blunt hits the road with Sara Bareilles for an 11-city romp as part of VH1′s You Oughta Know Tour. The UK crooner, an esteemed alum of our You Oughta Know program, will be working the tunes from the recent All the Lost Souls, while the soulful Bareilles, another YOK singer, just put out Little Voice in July.

Find out where they’re playing below, and check back here to purchase tickets starting November 17th. In the meantime, whet your appetite by clicking on the pics below and then watch Blunt’s videos and Bareilles’ sexy “Love Song.”

2/4/08 Seattle, WA The Moore Theater
2/6/08 San Francisco, CA The Warfield
2/7/08 Los Angeles, CA The Wiltern
2/8/08 Las Vegas, NV The Pearl
2/12/08 Denver, CO Ogden Theatre
2/22/08 Chicago, IL Vic Theatre
2/23/08 Ann Arbor Michigan Theater
2/27/08 Boston, MA Orpheum Theatre
2/29/08 New York, NY Beacon Theatre
3/1/08 Philadelphia, PA Keswick Theatre
3/4/08 Atlanta, GA The Tabernacle

Related Content
news_20?94.gifJames Blunt Artist Info
news_20?94.gifSara Bareilles Artist Info

by

Next Great Band: Don’t Go Changing

next-great-american-band2.jpg
Whatever you do, don?t mock the judges on this show ? America will boot your ass to the street. Last week the TNGAB?s three pundits told The Muggs? Danny and Rocket?s Lauren hone their vocals, and each either made a puss or directly snarled at the comments. Friday night both bands were dumped. Rock ?n? roll is supposed to be about attitude to some degree, but pop-rock, especially when it comes to this Fox fodder, needs to wag its tail and woof politely if it wants to hang tight.
Read more…

by (@katespencer)

Way Weird: One Woman, 200 Orgasms

orgasmgirl.jpgWe know it’s Monday when we come face-to-face with a story that would be better served as a shady plot to a 70′s porno. Apparently some British girl has come forward to reveal that she has Permanent Sexual Arousal Syndrome (say what?), which is just that: continuous sexual stimulation all day long from regular, mundane everyday things. This is one of those things that dumb guys might think would be “awesome,” but women know otherwise. Her life sounds like one pleasurable hell. 24-year old O-er Sarah Carmen explains, “As a skin care specialist I have to use tools which vibrate a lot of the time for micro-dermabrasion and they sometimes set me off.”

Sarah blames the problem on anti-depressants, and has had up to 200 orgasms in one day. She even had five during the 40-minute interview about her O problem! This sex pic screenplay is just writing itself. Someone call Jenna Jameson! [Image: News of the World]

Meanwhile, in a more wholesome tale of a girl making it big for an honest-to-goodness talent, check out the clip below of 15-year old Charice Pempengco on the Korean show Star King. Even if she sucked, the overall weirdness of Star King and its shocked audience would make it worth watching, but thankfully Charice is kind of amazing. It’s like she has Jennifer Hudson, Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey all stuck in her throat and they’re each fighting to climb out. Er, that sounds weird. Just watch.

<:charice::e>

by (@katespencer)

Alicia Keys Wanted to Be Wild

alicia-keys-150?200.jpgShocker of the day: Alicia Keys is just the singer’s stage name. OMG! Her real name is Alicia Augello-Cook, which doesn’t quite roll off the tongue in the same melodic way as her current moniker. But back when she was picking her last name, she revealed to Newsweek that she almost went with Alicia Wild, which her mom told her sounded like “a stripper” name. It seems to us like she was channeling some of the great 80′s vixens (and possibly idols?) like Pebbles, Stacey Q and Samantha Fox. What’s most hilarious about her almost-name is that Alicia is anything but wild. Alicia ‘Everyone Likes Me Because I’m Talented and Sweet’ would have probably been more fitting. Still, it’s cute that she picked Keys because of her piano-love. It’s not a bad idea: Britney Voice Modifier and Ashlee Lip-Syncing Machine both have a nice ring to them.

Another suggestion: Alicia ‘Has an Awesome Album That Drops Tomorrow.’ Give a listen to As I Am in its entirety over on The Leak right now!

by (@katespencer)

The Best of Jessica Simpson’s Bad Movies

Jessica Simpson is our most favoritest actress ever. Someone should create an awards show that’s more prestigious than the Oscars, because that is what Jessica deserves. This award should be named after her, too! Her talent – her glowing, blossoming, raw talent – deserves nothing less. We’ve come to this awed conclusion after viewing the latest notch in Jessica’s acting bed post – the trailer for her upcoming flick Major Movie Star. It looks like another winner; horrible script + bad comedic timing = gold at the box office!

Below the jump we’ve got some other fine selections from the Jessica Simpson Library of Craptastic Films. Take a look at the trailer for her still unreleased movie Blonde Ambition. Did the same stoned monkey write the script for that flick and Major Movie Star? The both seem so similarly awful. Or that could just be Jessica’s acting skills.

Read more…

by (@katespencer)

Britney’s Drugged Up and Dancing Badly

Is Britney on drugs? Is she not? Did she flunk a drug test? And why did she run that red light, anyway? Was it….DRUGS?!

These are the questions our friends – The Big Time Hollywood Lawyers – will be asking on Wednesday when Brit and K-Fed head back to court over the pop star’s dumb driving move last week, in which she ran a red light with her kids (and parenting coach) in the car as she texted on her phone. The fugly diva also allegedly failed a drug test last week, though her friends are saying it was a “false positive.” Apparently the prescription drugs she has to take for being an overall nut showed up, which probably explains why the court is not freaking out over the failure.

If you want to see what Britney’s VMAs dance fest would have looked like had the pop start committed to what she was doing, check out the video above featuring a side-by-side comparison of the choreography being done in rehearsal by a stand-in dancer and Brit’s actual performance. It’s nice to know that the number was actually kind of awesome before Brit and her sparkle-kini got involved.

Related Content
news_20?94.gifBritney Drives Like an Effing Idiot
news_20?94.gifWho’s Peeing in Britney’s Cup?
news_20?94.gifBritney Bombs on the VMAs
photo_20?93.gifPhotos
video_20?93.gifWatch “Gimme More” and more!

by

R.I.P., Kanye’s Mama

kanye-_donda_west.jpg

Kanye West‘s mom, Donda West, has passed away at the age of 58. Kanye’s mouthpiece, of course, has asked “for privacy during this time of grief,” although it’s virtually impossible to grant that entirely. See, Donda, according to this blog, allegedly died as the result of an allergic reaction to medicine she was given for cosmetic surgery (a tummy tuck and breast augmentation). Crazy! I haven’t heard of someone dying from plastic surgery since Clueless. Anyway, Kanye and his mom were obviously tight (he wrote about her, most notably in College Dropout‘s “Hey Mama,” and she wrote about him in Raising Kanye, a book she released in May). Think about him in his time of grief. [Telegraph.co.uk; Image: Getty]

Related Content
news_20?94.gifKanye West Artist Info
video_20?93.gifMusic Videos
photo_20?93.gifPhotos

by (@katespencer)

Monday: Iggy the Dog is More Famous Than Ellen

ellen-1112.jpgIggy the Dog Shoots TV Commercial
Only in America could a dog milk its 15 minutes of fame like this. Bark cheese, Iggy! If you can dance better than Ellen, maybe you can get your own doggy show. [Us]

Britney & Her Mom Get New Managers
Both of the Spears girls have got some new representation, ya’ll! Brit’s mama now has a manager (uh, why?) and Britney’s hired creepy pal Sam Lufti to be her babysitter. [NYP]

Kate Hudson Makes Out with Heath
Wow, it only took Kate 28 years to finally kiss someone hot. Farewell Dax Shephard, hello Oscar-nominated Bob Dylan-playing hotness Heath Ledger. Added bonus – their kids can have play dates! [NYP]

Elisabeth Hasselbeck Has a Baby Boy
Happy news for Elisabeth and her hubby, sad news for our ears. Her big-mouth will be back yapping on TV in only a few hours (noooo!), when she announces the kid’s name on The View. [People]

Amy Winehouse?s Hubby in Hot Water
They tried to make Blake go to jail – and he didn’t really have a choice in the matter because he’s being charged with tampering with a witness. [People]