Yes, Britney Spears acts totally, effing insane. But it’s not that’s she’s crazy – it’s because she’s pregnant! Again! All those hormones are makin’ her weird, ya’ll! According to numerous tabloids, Britney’s been lugging around baby #3 for four weeks. Apparently Brit even emailed around a pic of the ultrasound last week (she knows how to email?) and the rumored father of her baby, producer J.R. Rotem, has supposedly confirmed the news (er, he probably confirmed it by leaving the country).

But a baby isn’t going to like growing up in Chez Britney, where she supposedly changes her kids’ diapers on the same white couch that she lets her little dog poop all over (we are not making this up). And if her new baby needs a pacifier, it can just suck on one of the sex toys Brit keeps in the “large, covered candy dish on the living room table.” The baby’s first words will probably be ‘booty call,’ cuz that’s what sex-obsessed Britney loves to do. She even has a “double-locked fantasy room” that a source says is “filled with sex toys, from ticklers, whips and chains to fur-trimmed handcuffs hanging from the metal bedframe.” Sounds like it’ll make a great nursery! [Image: InTouch]

Related Content
Britney Fills Baby Void With More Babies
More Driving No-No’s from Britney
Britney Wants to Catch K-Fed Behaving Badly
Britney: Cherry Poppin’ at Age Fourteen?

Usher‘s wife, Tameka Foster, reportedly gave birth to a boy Monday night. Word is that Tameka and baby are expected to head home from the hospital on Wednesday. The family has yet to release a statement, so details are scant. We know nothing of the boy’s name or his birth weight. I know the mystery of Usher’s child’s birth weight is going to keep you up at night, so rest assured, we will keep you updated as details roll in. The story is still developing…like a newborn, actually. [People]

One would think that a woman on the verge of losing custody of her children and her driver’s license might have more pressing issues on her mind, but not Britney Spears. The Hindenburg of Pop Music is starting production for her music video today in Los Angeles for her second single “Pieces of Me.” You might remember this track as the ditty she takes aim at the media’s portrayals of her: “I’m Mrs. American dream/ SinceI was 17/I’m Mrs. Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous/I’m Mrs. ‘Oh my God, that Britney’s shameless’/ I’m Mrs. ‘Extra, extra, this just in’ / I’m Mrs. ‘She’s too fat, now she’s too thin.’”

The premise of the video, as reported by UsWeekly, has Spears sneaking into a club in disguise with her back-up dancers in order to elude the paparazzi (no word on whether Brit’s omnipresent court-appointed monitor gets a part). Given Spears’ visitation schedule with sons Jayden James and Sean Preston, she’ll only be available to shoot for two hours. Shots planned include Spears running down a staircase, and dancing on a
bar, both activities the pop tart should be an old pro at, provided underwear isn’t required. Personnel on the shoot also includes a boby double for Brit, according to UsWeekly.