50 Cent is just like us, at least in one respect: he can’t pronounce the name of Pussycat Dolls‘ Nicole Scherzinger, either. Even though they got together for a track for Fiddy’s upcoming Curtis disc, the rapper couldn’t get down with her name. He recently told Blender:
“They should’ve changed her name. Her name is Schizinger or some s***, right? That’s a f***ed up name…I’d give her like a stripper name. Maybe ‘Pleasure’ or some s***. ‘Nicole Natalie.’“
Fiddy has the right idea: down with Schizinger! If old Schizzy isn’t feeling “Pleasure” or “Nicole Natalie,” here are a few other suggestions she should seriously consider. They’re all better than “Scherzigner,” but then again, the sound of a vacuum cleaner is better than “Scherzinger.” Anyway, our list:
- The One Who Sings
- The One Who Stands in Front
- Eva Non-Goria
- Fueled by Iovine
[Blender Blog / Image credit: Getty]
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Tay Zonday, the wide-eyed YouTubian genius(?) behind the summer’s biggest hit, “Chocolate Rain,” performed the song live on Jimmy Kimmel last night. He jams it out like crazy on the keyboard and seems to have perfected his mic/breathing movements. And yes, he even talks like he sings. Fan-tay-stic!
“Chocolate Rain” and Tay Zonday are having the Best Week Ever!
Even though their divorce was just settled and custody split 50-50 between Britney and Kevin, the former backup dancer filed papers yesterday for primary custody of the couple’s two sons. A source revealed that Federline has been worried that Brit’s wacky behavior exposes the babies to “unnecessary risk.” Okay, technically a topless pool makeout sesh doesn’t directly harm their kids, but we see K-Fed’s point. Britney’s kinda lost it, and she’s got the weave to prove it. Spears has not released a statement regarding her ex’s move, but she’d probably say something like, “Huh? Wah? I’m freaking out! No, not because of Kevin trying to get all custodian, but because I can’t find my Marlboro Lights. Seriously though ya’ll , I’m a good mom and a brainiac – that’s gotta count for something!” [People. Image: Getty]
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Check out this clip of your favorite troubled starlet giving her thoughts on “good accessories for fall.” Funny how she left out alcohol ankle bracelets and pocket-sized cocaine containers.
[A Socialite's Life]
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Apparently all that time Diddy was out macking ladies and hanging with J. Lo and her Versace dress, he had an on-again off-again girlfriend waiting in the wings. But now they’re apparently off for good, and Kim Porter‘s run to OK! Magazine to dish and diss Diddy. Oh, if only we regular ladies had a sweet, glossy outlet in which to rag on our exes but alas, we’re not all models with three kids fathered by a hip hop legend. Some of Kim’s choice quotes include this one on Combs’ wandering eyes – and hands and lips:
“I will never sit here and say that Puffy — or any man — is 100 percent faithful. I just don’t believe it. Some of you are, but I’m not going to sit here and say that I didn’t believe that he cheated on me. I would never say that. I’m aware that he’s cheated.”
The tiny-bodied, big-voiced singer has apparently fallen ill with exhaustion, also known as “Starlet Virus” or “The Lindsay Lohan Disease.” Exhaustion is often an excuse given by publicists when their client is sick with something else, so all bets are on as to what is really ailing Amy. She apparently was rushed to a London hospital after some sort of incident, and is now back at home under orders to have “complete rest.” This means no more concerts for the Brit, who was scheduled to perform at the Oya Festival in Norway tonight. It also presumably means no more booze for Winehouse, whose been known to lug around a Jack Daniels bottle from time to time. Hopefully now she’s gonna give her liver a little rest too. [Image: Getty]
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Forget the chihuahua – the latest and greatest trend to be embraced by the stars is their own uber-sassy mothers. And you too can have one – just grab your mom, do something super effing stupid to get her reallll mad at you (or somebody else), and then shove her into that Louis Vuitton dog carrier you bought two seasons ago and tote her around for all the world to see. These days everyone in Hollywood’s got a p*ssed off mom!
- Usher’s mom Jonetta Patton hates his new wife so much that she skipped their tiny wedding to hit up a day spa!
- Lynne Spears and her daughter Britney are feuding so bad that Brit supposedly thinks her mama has knocked boots with K-Fed to get back at her!
- And good ol’ Dina Lohan is always angry with somebody – though never her cracked out daughter. Currently she’s being sued for swindling $400,000 out of a music producer and never paying him back. Tacky, sure – but trendy!
So take off the retro sunglasses, remove your leggings and lug your mama around instead. The baggage you two have is guaranteed to make you the top trendista in your hood. [Images: Getty]
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The New York Post reports that on Monday, Britney Spears crashed her car into a parked station wagon. When she exited her vehicle, she told the paparazzi, “I’m a brainiac!” As a blogger, it’s thrilling to encounter a celebrity who writes her own punchlines. Brit just keeps getting better. [New York Post]
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That’s our Britney! The apparently very horny starlet dragged a bunch of her video dancers to the pool of an exclusive LA hotel, which she had opened especially for her group at 2am. The booze flowed, Brit got naked, everyone else follower her leaded, and a game of Truth or Dare ensued. Are you at all surprised by this, or that her infant sons were set to be dropped off at her house a mere 10 hours later by K-Fed? Nope. Brit got it on with one of the dancers, 21-year-old Matt Encinias, who told Us, ?I was told all she wanted to do that night was kiss a boy. And that?s what she did. Mission accomplished.?
Matt was invited back to her suite where he discovered the singer ready for more booty action. “I went in and found Britney lying on the bed with her knees up and just a pair of pink panties on, ” he said. Matt was forced to bail before he could seal the deal because he had to take care of a drunk friend, saving the world from the possibility of third Brit-spawn. Back up dancers beware! Britney’s in need of some loving and she’ll stop at nothing to get it. And if you think you can resist her sextastic ways, think again – girlfriend’s wearing fake tattoos on her nipples. Pretty. Damn. Hot. [Us Weekly, The Sun. Image: Us Weekly]
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