Ugh. Jessica Simpson has finally figured out that her singing/acting/hardly wearing any clothing career is fizzling, so she’s continuing to sell new products in order to fund her Louis Vuitton habit. She’s hawked shoes, fake hair, edible make up, bags, and bathing suits. Next up – lingerie, which we imagine will represent the blond’s lust for tacky fashion. Jessica Simpson?s Intimates will launch in Spring 2009, and we beg of you – DON’T BUY IT! We don’t need to give JSimps another reason to stick around.
I have no idea who Chuck the Movie Guy is (should I?) and judging from this one video he seems like a bit of a tool, but he’s nowhere near as big of a jerk as Justin Timberlake! Watch and cringe as Chuck asks stupid question after stupid question, while JT gets more and more pissed off at the interview. You’d think with all the millions Justin’s making he could pimp his new flick without getting pissy. Guess not.
In conclusion, my heart goes out to Jessica Biel, who has to date this douche. He seems like a real barrel of laughs.
Fun with rumors time! Queen Latifah is allegedly planning on marrying her supposed longtime girlfriend Jeannette Jenkins this summer, after gay marriage is legalized in California. The only problem is that Queen’s never come out – about her sexuality or her relationship with Jenkins – so all we can do is speculate (and we do it well). The National Enquirer says that the couple is “?planning an intimate ceremony with close family and friends.? Latifah has said she would like to adopt a child, particular an American baby, and this may be the first step toward showing her commitment to Jeannette and to providing a stable home life.?
Last year Queen bought Jeannette a new Range Rover, which she had delivered as a surprise during a lunch out. Will she surprise her “trainer” this year with a diamond ring? Stay tuned! [Bossip]
Diddy is all pissed off about the “news” yesterday that he had changed his name back to Puff Daddy. Guess what, he didn’t – and we’re all fools for caring. Thanks, P Didds! Watch this video for a couple of heartfelt messages from the one and only Sean John:
1. VOTE on November 4th (we’re down!).
2. He’s rich, b*tch. His words, not ours.
Wino‘s main man Blake plead guilty to assaulting a dude in a pub. He’s also guilty of being a massive tool.? [DListed]
Tori Spelling is about to pop her second kid out right now! Whee.? [Seriously? OMG!]
Happy 31st Birthday Kanye! We’re sure it was the best bash June 8 had ever seen.? [Concrete Loop]
Taylor Swift is obsessively neat. And hot! Nice combo.? [ICYDK]
?Sam Ronson and Alicia Keys will be performing at Nicole Richie‘s wedding to Joel Madden. As if we weren’t already jealous enough of her sweet life. Grrr.? [PopCrunch]
Diddy Sean John Puffy Puff Daddy is BACK! Who cares, right? Well, Diddy does. He’s reclaimed his former monniker via a rap on the “Check Your Coat” remix by his ex-stylist O’Neal McKnight. “They call me Puff Daddy… he’s back,” says Diddy, announcing the official name change. He then took to his Myspace to plug to song and reiterated the return of the Puff, writing, “This is your boy Puff Daddy!!! Yes Puffy Daddy, the King of the Remix…”
Meh. We like the King of Desperation better.
“I told them to go home and make babies.”
Yep, that’s the always wise Snoop Dogg, on his instructions for Beyonce and Jay-Z‘s post-wedding life. The guy’s been married for-like-EVER (ten years, three kids!), so he should know. He also offered this tidbit of advice on how to make your nuptials last: “Communication, and being able to fight and get back up. To have misunderstanding and [then] get some understanding.”
For shizzle, dawg. [People]
Your favorite freak show, Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag, showed up at the ‘A Time for Heroes’ Celebrity Carnival, and they spent their time cuddling with that creepy purple dinosaur Barney and sitting on tiny children in a ferris wheel booth. That poor little girl is afraid of being smothered by plastic. Though it looks as if Spencer and Heidi are all sugar and candy and everything sweet and nice, we’re pretty sure it’s just a front. Perez Hilton reported today that the pair were spotted buying guns “for Heidi’s protection.” Spencer Pratt can barely control his mouth – just think of the harm he could do with a real weapon!
We’ve got more pics of the terrible twosome, as well as The Hills gals, Khloe Kardashian, Mischa Barton and Nicole Richie. Click!
(The VH1 Blog has solicited Mark Muro of the California law firm Muro & Lampe, Inc. to keep tabs on the R. Kelly child pornography trial.)
The defense fought back on Friday with a series of witnesses who were friends or family to the alleged victim, and who testified that the girl in the sex tape is not the alleged victim. Although the defense scored some points with this contradictory testimony, I think it’s likely that the identification issue still favors the prosecution. There is an obvious motive to protect the alleged victim by denying her involvement in the tape, but not so clearly a motive for identifying her as a victim against her wishes. Still, the defense may have created a reasonable doubt. (+1 for the defense.)
The defense also called famed celebrity private investigator Jack Palladino, who is perhaps best known for his role in attempting to discredit women with whom Bill Clinton was allegedly intimate. Other famous clients include Courtney Love and Mariah Carey. Palladino testified that he thwarted an extortion attempt by Lisa Van Allen, who last week gave testimony about her threesome with Kelly and the alleged victim. Read more…
So much Bobby Brown news, so little time! Let’s break this down nice and easy.
1. Bobby’s claiming Usher ripped him off.
In his new autobiography, the New Edition star accuses Usher of stealing his style. “I’ve always considered myself ‘The King of Stage.’ To this very day, I still don’t think anyone can get with me on the stage. I own the stage,” the ego-less Brown writes. “I watched one of Usher’s shows and he basically did my whole show. It was as if it was me on stage. The thing about it is, I love seeing that. It’s a compliment to me as a performer.”
2. Bobby’s son Landon says Whitney was a “nightmare” to grow up with, and that he replaced Kevin Coster as her bodyguard.
Not only did Whit alleged force Landon to sleep in a guest house and kept him away from his half-sister Bobbi Kristina, she treated him more like staff than family. He says, “She decided to turn me into one of her security personnel. I was a teenager but I was walking around dressed up in all black with a Security shirt and she?d have me work for her. I was just another one of her staff.?
3. When not protecting Whitney, Landon boned Lindsay Lohan in a bathroom stall.
We’re sure this was exciting for the younger Brown, but let’s be real – who hasn’t been with LiLo on a toilet? He claims: “Me and Lindsay got really, really close. She followed me to the bathroom during a private party, and, well, we basically got together. I think she knew who I was when she first saw me. We were just staring at each other and she walked by. I walked into the bathroom and she followed me in.”
We don’t quite buy the claim that Lindsay knew who Landon was when she saw him (he’s got the same ego as his Pops!), but we bet she does now!