Lil’ Miss Wacky and her tiny tots have bailed on Los Angeles and headed to Las Vegas to do whatever it is a young mom and her two kids do in Sin City. G-Rated strip shows and gambling for goldfish crackers, probably. The only problem is, Britney is not supposed to have her kids out of state without K-Fed’s permission, which she did not have. Fed-daddy is p*ssed, and with good reason, it seems. His babies are probably riding Siegfried and Roy’s tigers right now!
Brit’s family vacation only got worse when her bodyguard put the smack down on a photographer at the Wynn Hotel, where the star was staying. Apparently the pap got too close to Sean Preston, and the bodyguard, JC Camera, freaked. Yes, his last name is hilarious in this situation. Camera was charged with a citation of battery, while Britney filed an “allegation of battery” against the photog on behalf of Sean Preston. Britney has since left the hotel, and has hopefully learned that if she wants to really keep the paparazzi away she should go to a remote vacation spot. Try Vermont over Vegas, girlfriend. [Image: Getty]
Poor Nicole – always copying her pal Paris. First it was the bone-thin look, then the hair, now she’s pulling the “sneak off to jail when everyone leasts expect it.” The tiny starlet has headed off to court this morning (watch video of her arrival here) with a dapper looking Joel Madden attached at her side. Nicole is apparently going to plead either guilty or no contest to her DUI charge, and will then receive a minimum of five days in jail. Might as well get it out of the way before that baby really starts kickin’.
On a superficial note, Nicole looks totally bangin’ on her last day of freedom. Cute dress, nice big shades, and a hairdo worthy of a wedding. Kudos, my petite friend! A proper lady always go down in style. And her own pants. For more of Nicole in cute clothes, check out this behind the scenes video from Nylon of her photo-shoot for the mag’s cover.
UPDATE: Nicole was sentenced to four days in county jail, which she must begin serving by September 28th. She was also fined $2048, is on probation for 3 years, and must attend a 21 day alcohol education course. [TMZ. Booking Photo]
TMZ has a four-piece video interview with the three men who were supposedly in the white Denali that Lindsay Lohan drove recklessly through Santa Monica prior to her DUI arrest. It’s a lot of information to weed through, but compelling as hell nonetheless. These guys allege, among many things, that Lindsay was drinking cocktails and doing shots, drove (stole?) a car belonging to one of the men, ran over one guy’s foot, zoomed down the highway doing 100 miles an hour, drove in circles around the second car on the highway, and at one point yelled, “I can’t get in trouble. I’m a celebrity. I can do whatever the f**k I want.”
Right, Linds. Right. There’s no way to tell if these guys are exaggerating at all – the guy’s bandage on his foot looks a tad homemade, for example – but still their tale is totally enthralling. Especially the part where Lindsay, when confronted by the police, supposedly tries to blame her reckless driving on “the black kid.” Her words. Ugh.
Check out all the videos HERE.
Whoopi and Sherri: New to The View
Though ABC will not yet confirm it, the two funny women are rumored to be both be headed to The View round table come this fall. Surely the Donald can find one of them to hate. [MSNBC]
Hilary Duff’s New Man’s a Jock
The teen star has moved on from her rocker ex Joel Madden to hockey star Mike Comrie, who is also the heir to some Canadian family fortune. Nice rebound, Hil! [TMZ]
Tom Cruise Extortion Plot Busted
A guy known as the “Sultan of Sleaze” has been arrested from trying to extort over a million dollars for TomKat in return for stolen private wedding photos. Tom doesn’t show the money to anybody. [Us Magazine]
Britain’s big-boobed model “Jordan” and her husband Peter Andre recently named their newborn baby girl Princess Tiaamii, which is a combo of Thea and Amy – their mothers’ names. With, of course, Princess in front of it. If you thought that was the worst celebs could do, think again. Stars have gone out of their way to make a name like Suri seem tame and boring. For example, actress/dj Shannyn Sossamon has a kid named Audio Science. Toni Braxton‘s two tots are Diezel Ky and Denim Cole, while My Name is Earl actor Jason Lee named his child Pilot Inspektor Riesgraf. But no one can top Jermaine Jackson, who coined one of his offspring Jermajesty. Holy awfulness. Keep in mind, it is impossible to tell which of these children are boys or girls. It’s beyond gender neutral – these names are gender baffling.
It’s a good thing there are so many celebrity babies on the horizon, to make way for newer, more horrifying names. Christina Aguilera could call her baby Lady Marmalade, while maybe Nicole Richie should think about something like Toothpick Tattoo Richie-Madden. That’s (baby) hot! [Times Online. Image: Getty]
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Can you hear that light drum roll? It’s the opening crescendo of R. Kelly’s “Trapped in the Closet,” and if it’s ringing in your ears, it’s for a reason: Kells has prepped 10 new chapters of his R&B melodrama to be released Aug. 21 on DVD. The tangled web, which often feels as if it was made up as Kelly went along, features the singer narrating as the character “Sylvester” and is the campiest contribution to American R&B since…well, Sylvester. The future installments will feature R. Kelly assuming a new role in addition to that of Sylvester: he’ll play a beard-wearing, potbellied old man named Randolph. There’s no word on further plot developments: whether Gwendolyn is going to beat Cathy’s wig-wearing ass or if Chuck, Rufus and Cathy can settle their bisexual love triangle (that “chapter” he performed at the 2005 VMAs never did surface) or if we’ll have to endure 10 more rounds of the same damn melody and instrumentation. Mostly, we’re like Idolator: we just want to know what happened to the midget.
Of course, the true cliffhanger hinges on whether, after two years, people will still care about this complicated nonsense. For now all we can do is shake our heads dissapprovingly, much like Sylvester did as he watched Chuck, Rufus and Cathy duke it out in the then-final chapter. [Billboard]
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Last night Entertainment Tonight featured a “Lohan Family Insider,” Gina Glockman, who gave us Lilo’s side of what went down on that fateful Monday night. Her chat session included the following deets:
- Lindsay was having a gathering at her house, when she started sipping the booze. Glockman claims several people reported that she wasn’t drinking…but alcohol ankle bracelets don’t lie. Neither do breathalyzers.
- Tarin, the assistant, came into the house looking disheveled like she had been crying, and Lindsay got “concerned.” Concerned that someone had discovered her off the wagon?
- The car chase was followed by an argument in a parking lot. Apparently there were numerous people present, but the cops supposedly focused in on Lindsay. They also “strong-armed” her into the breathalyzer test.
- The greatest part of the whole interview: The coke found in her pants pocket was NOT Lindsay’s, because she was wearing someone else’s pants.
I mean, it’s fine to make excuses for the girl, but someone else’s pants? Didn’t everyone use that excuse at 16? That’s like second to “the dog at my homework” on the lame excuse scale. And does this mean she was partying without pants? That’s not just “off the wagon” behavior, it’s plain creepy. [Entertainment Tonight / Image: Getty]
Celebrity Bad Girls
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Finally! Nicole Richie wants to spill the beans about her summer in hiding. The skinny star will be interviewed by Diane Sawyer in segments that will appear next week on Good Morning America and 20/20. Hopefully Diane won’t go easy on Nicole, but in case she throws softballs at the starlet – “Nicole, the world is dying to know… How do you do your hair?” – here are some questions for the anchor to toss at the tiny mom-to-be:
- Is driving the wrong way on the highway fun? Honestly, it is, right?
- Seriously – is Ashlee Simpson pregnant?
- What’s up with that skunk on Joel Madden‘s head?
- Who’s prettier – Hilary or Haylie Duff?
- You’ve already named your dog Honeychild. Are going to call your baby MolassesPuppy?
- Was feuding with Paris Hilton like being a vacation from stupidity?
- The world is dying to know… How do you do your hair? [Image: Getty]
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The former Destiny’s Child crooner reveals her past insecurities in next month Essence magazine, telling the rag:
“I remember wishing I was more fair-skinned, but Tina Knowles, Beyonc?‘s mom, would say, ‘Don’t you know how beautiful you are?’ She made me come into my brown beauty. I didn’t get it, but now I do. I am chocolate and beautiful and loving it.”
We’re loving it too Kelly! It’s so nice to see someone have a “You go girl!” moment amidst all the other messes of ladies out there. If only you could pass some of that self-esteem along…Hm, if you can turn it into a powder maybe LiLo will snort it! [NY Post / Image: Getty]
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Beyonc? is beautiful (and for that matter, bootylicious) no matter what they say, but it turns out that words can get her down. And for that reason, the much-scrutinized diva stays off the blogs. Says Bey:
“Sometimes I’ll run across certain things, usually in the paper, because I read the paper more so than the Web. There’s one or two sites that I can go to. But if I go on the Internet and try to see what people are saying, I’ll probably want to crawl under a rock. (Laughs.) Because I’m still human and certain things, it just hurts, so I try not to read the Internet too much. “
It’s always ridiculous when superstars feel the need to remind us that they’re human, as though they think that we think that their synergy of incredible luck and skill has somehow altered their DNA. Besides that, Bey, who’s one of the most guarded and least-revealing divas that pop music has ever seen, is definitely going for the self-humanizing angle here. While it could very well be true, this plea of vulnerability has about the emotional resonance of the crocodile tears that flow from her eyes every night she sings “Flaws and All” on stage. Here’s a flaw for you: bad acting. We saw Dreamgirls, Bey. You can’t fool us. (Not that you’re listening or anything.) [AP/Yahoo! / Image credit: Getty]
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