Brit "It" couple Pete Doherty and Kate Moss are back with another installment of their intermittent broadcast, playing the same song they did last time (wherein they declare "Sonny and Cher we ain’t." Indeed.), only this time dressed in military uniforms. The song’s actually pretty catchy, except for Kate laying on the expletives. In other Kate n’ Pete news, Pete "Never Met a Needle He Didn’t Like" Doherty will release his junkie diaries in the form of "Book of Albion," featuring the following prediction for the pair’s nuptials: "Smack and needle-free we shall marry in the summer and I become 10 times happier than any given smackhead. Huzzah!" The book will also include a love note from Kate: "You have touched my heart and soul you little f**ker . . . You make me high my sweet. My skin shivers and longs to be held by you." Hate to see what she puts in her kid’s lunchbox.
This is possibly the best Britney rumor we’ve heard in a longgggg time. X17 is reporting that the starlet’s visit to an attorney’s office yesterday may be her first step in obtaining a restraining order against her mother! Apparently their reconciliation is not going that well, and a still bitter Britney wants to keep Lynne Spears away from her grandchildren. All’s fair in love, war and family drama!
Meanwhile, Brit’s representative has revealed that her comeback album release date has been pushed back to 2008, which means more time for her to do ridiculous things, like wearing matching shorts with her assistant (complimented by pink snow boots, natch) while buying a pet bird. Who needs an album when we’ve got craziness to enjoy?
Browse All Britney Spears Photos
Now and then our Tour Survival Guide will check in with rockers about life on the road. Here’s Fiction Plane‘s lead singer Joe Sumner, currently on tour with the Police, on buccaneering, Wendy’s and Dave Navarro.
Jack Sparrow Envy
We [asked for] plastic swords and eye patches for acting like pirates. We put on our eye patches, brandished our swords and went around going "Arrrr!" I kept hold of the sword for a few days. We’ve only gotten them once — it happened in Vancouver. They?ve got no problem providing you with fifty bottles of Jack Daniels if you want it, but plastic swords, they?re like, "No! You?ll get it once. Then suffer in swordlessness."
Like Swimming, No Eating Two Hours Before Playing
We had traveled from Ohio to Wisconsin. There was terrible traffic and we didn?t have time to get any food, so right at the last minute we got Wendy burgers and stuffed them into our faces. It didn?t feel good. I?ve got a two-hour rule now. I think I cramped up at one point. No eating two hours before, even if I?m hungry.
Nick & Vanessa: Talk Wedding Plans?
The two may have been spotted baby shopping for Nick’s niece, but sources say the pair has been heard discussing wedding plans. [Page Sizzler]
50 Cent Gets Close with Princess
50 Cent and Brit Sarah Ferguson,Prince Andrew’s ex, held hands after the rapper’s performance at a NYC concert for Sarah’s charity. We’re sure the Queen would approve – 50′s richer than she is! [TMZ]
Pics: Lindsay Boxes Out the Booze
Lindsay sported boxing gloves and threw down some serious punches while sparring her trainer this week. Wonder whose face she’s pretending to hit? [X17}
The love fest continues as the hot-bodied pair hit Norway holding hands and looking all warm and fuzzy. Jessica even hung out with JT’s mom in Sweden, and they appeared just as close. So with all the love in the air, what’s the problem, you ask? Their ridiculous outfits (click here for pics)! These two are normally some of the best dressed stars out there (see photos, right), but Justin duds out in a pair of jean shorts with plaid trim that wouldn’t have been cool even in his N’Sync days. Jessica, GQ’s July cover model, is barely stunning in a housecoat that Florence Henderson could’ve rocked on The Brady Bunch. Wasn’t she like, the sexiest woman in the world a couple of years ago? Not anymore.
Please, Jess, Justin…Er, Justica. Bring your sexy back!
Just when you thought Idol hysteria couldn’t get any more absurd, Idol: The Musical comes along. Slated for an Off Broadway run with previews beginning July 5th, the new musical will focus on a group of students in Steubenville, Ohio who meet daily to share in their worship of Clay Aiken in an abandoned barn that "doubles as a shrine" to Aiken. For real. The play reaches its climax when the midwest leg of the Idol Tour is announced, and along with the usual performances in Chicago and Memphis, there’s a stop in Steubenville as well. No word on how Clive Davis feels on this one…
Ever since the widow Love sold off 25% of Kurt Cobain‘s catalog and licensed his image for use by the National Entertainment Collectibles Association (yes, seriously, such a thing exists), the sadly deceased Nirvana frontman has been popping up in all sorts of places. For example, as pictured here, you can now buy the Kurt Cobain lunchbox, which holds all manner of tasteful suicide sandwiches and needle-drop soups. Kurt has also been memorialized as an action figure and in a key chain that doubles up as a liquor flask, in a move that we suspect was motivated by suits at megacorporations who were wondering if they could get Kurt to kill himself twice. This follows on the heels of Cobain’s image being used in a Doc Marten’s ad, which officially has turned us off British combat boots, like, forever.
She may have gone to rehab and changed her partying ways, but Britney’s attitude still stinks. Something set the starlet off recently at shoot for her new perfume, and she reportedly freaked, walked out, and refused to continue working. A source says, "She is not listening to anyone and doing exactly what she wants." This may explain another tidbit of Britsanity, which alleges that she is trying to win back her tank top loving ex, K-Fed. She’s apparently enlisted her mom for help, and pictures show her recently sporting a ridiculously huge diamond on her ring finger. Is this a sign that Spears wants to reconcile? Or does she just love massive bling?
Let’s be real: she better get Kevin back, because there’s no way she can make a decent perfume commercial without his magic arrow shooting skills. What kind of fantasy is it without that hunk of Feder-beef running around in the ad?
Kelly Confesses Eating Disorder
The Idol has admitted that she struggled with bulimia as a teen after getting passed over for a role in her high school musical. [Us Magazine]
Lindsay: Still Playing Rehab Hooky
LiLo left rehab three times the other day, skipping the gym to head back to her apartment, where she moved truckloads of stuff out. Sounds like she’s definitely serious about staying in rehab for a while! [X17]
Mandy Bashes Braff in Song
She’s mad and she’s not gonna take it anymore! A song on Moore’s new album Wild Hope is reportedly about her rocky relationship with Scrubs star Zach Braff. [NY Post]
She may be way more “hardcore” than Jessica Simpson and Britney Spears, but the punk pop starlet wants what they got. No, not a divorce by the age of 25, but a movie career. The?singer is reportedly in talks with Sony BMG (also her record label) to star in a”thriller feature film,” a source tells Page Six, “playing kind of a white-trash girl.”
Hm. How badly does Avril want us to make a joke right here? It’d be too easy, so we’ll just offer this bit of advice. Before she steps in front of the camera, she may want to sit down with some popcorn and watch the extended versions of Crossroads and Employee of the Month. Or perhaps Glitter, or maybe anything Madonna has done. The list goes on and on. Watch out Avril! Stick to what you know – gold records and silly outfits.