Jessica Simpson Goes Country

by (@katespencer)

jessica-simpson-country.jpgAshlee‘s big sis has dropped her first single off her brand spankin’ new country album, and boy does it suck ya’ll! At least our little divorcee has learned a valuable less – if at first you don’t succeed, just try a different musical genre. But never fear, dear Jessica Simpson fans! If the song and subsequent country album both flop, she’ll have Tony Romo’s beefy arms to run into. The football star has taken his lady back under one condition – her dad stays out of the picture and stops messing with their relationship. Sadly, her career is another story.

Give Jessica’s new single – titled “Come On Over” – a listen and tell us what you think. Good, bad or ugly?

Trial Forecaster: R. Kelly’s Former Assistant Drops Bomb

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(The VH1 Blog knows very little about the law. So we’ve solicited Mark Muro, a founder of the California law firm Muro & Lampe, Inc., to keep a running tab on which side has the advantage in the R. Kelly child pornography trial. Check back daily for updates.)

Week two started off with a bang for the prosecution as Lindsey Perryman, a former assistant to R. Kelly, testified that the alleged victim once showed up at Kelly?s studio with a “pillow and overnight bag.” (What? He didn’t have a spare pillow?) According to Perryman, this was not an isolated incident, but the alleged victim would come by the studio a couple of time’s a week. On one occasion, Perryman even claims to have driven the girl to Kelly’s home. Perryman identified both the alleged victim and Kelly as the ones in the tape. This eye witness is particularly damaging to the defense because she has no apparent ax to grind with Kelly.
+1 for the prosecution. Read more…

Gossip Break: Katie’s Lost in NYC

by (@katespencer)

katie-h.jpgWithout Tom Cruise dragging her around, Katie Holmes looks like a lost child.? [DListed]

Pete Wentz‘s sense of humor is as original as his emo outfits. Snooze.? [Seriously? OMG!]

Tori Spelling has joined the cast of the new 90210, making it just like the old 90210.? [ICYDK]

Diddy and Jay-Z got in a big fight over something (no it wasn’t Beyonce).? [Crunk+Disorderly]

Is Brit-Brit dating her agent? If she’s not shaving her head and crashing cars, do we care?? [I'mNotObsessed]

No, Jared Leto is not dating Jessica Simpson, no matter what you heard. He has common sense, after all.? [PopSugar]

Ask Weezy: Your Questions Answered

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A few weeks ago, we asked you to submit your love and relationship questions to Lil Wayne. No question was too racy, no situation too complicated — the superstar MC would tackle anything.

Well, our hero has listened to all the questions, and in the first installment of “Ask Weezy,” he explains what to do when you’ve got a lazy lady, whether a man’s taking advantage, and if there’s something too freaky for even Wayne to do in the bedroom. Be sure to stop back on Friday, when we’ll have Wayne answer more questions, and pre-order your copy of Tha Carter III here, out June 10.

Lindsay’s Dad Thinks His Daughter Likes Chicks

by (@katespencer)

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Remember those pics of Lindsay Lohan getting all kissy n’ cuddly with her BFF Samantha Ronson? Well her dad thinks it’s a sure signal that his baby girl is currently hitting it. Michael Lohan told Us magazine that their budding love affair “is evident to anyone with half a brain.” Normally we think Daddy Lohan talks crazy, but he finally might have a couple of screws straight!He did not add to the gossip frenzy that LiLo and Sam may be engaged, which is the current rumor du jour since the redhead showed up in Cannes this weekend wearing some diamonds on her ring finger. Before we let a big long sigh about how dumb this one is, let us add to the stupidity by telling you that the alleged wedding location is Dollywood. Yep, Dolly Parton‘s amusement park. Lindsay’s trashy, but she’s not like, that bad.

Brooke Hogan’s Car Accident Scare

by (@katespencer)

brookehogan.jpgBrooke Hogan, star of the VH1 show Hogan Knows Best, was in a car accident this weekend, which immediately dragged up memories of the tragic car accident that landed her brother in jail for 8 months and his BFF in a coma. Can’t this family get a little bit of good luck every now and then? The wannabee singer was hit from behind (while cruising with a pal in her Mercedes) and pushed into a concrete wall. As usual, Brooke hopped onto her Myspace page to write about the ordeal and then promptly took her note down. She wrote:

“I don’t know if you heard, but my friend and I got into a really bad car accident today ourselves . . . As I turned on my car I clicked my seatbelt. As we pulled out onto the road, I looked over and realized my friend didn’t have her seatbelt on. I reminded her to put it on and the minute she clicked it, a car crashed into us. It was a horrible car accident, one that most would be severely hurt in, but we had our seatbelts on and they kept us in tight.”

Meet the Next Amy Winehouse – Her Goddaughter

by (@katespencer)

Wanna meet the up and coming little lady with a big voice who could knock Amy Winehouse off her crack-covered pedestal? It’s none other than Wino’s 12-year old goddaughter Dionne Bromfield, and a video of her – filmed by none other than the UK’s own super-director Pete Doherty – singing Alicia Key‘s hit “If I Ain’t Got You” is currently racking up thousands of views on YouTube. Accompanying the tween on guitar is none other than a bra-clad Amy, who says of the future-star, “…I love her to bits. Dionne really is special, she’s better than I was at her age.”

Hopefully her godmother’s rocky path can serve as a lesson to young Dionne, who attends a singing school in England and is heading to LA this summer with Amy to start working on her career. As long as she remembers that crack is whack, she’ll be fine!

The 6 Scariest Celebrity Stage Parents

by (@katespencer)

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There, there, Jeff Archuleta. Feeling upset about your son David coming in second on American Idol? You’re not alone. Tons of celebrity stage parents feel shame when their child fails to live up to the exceedingly high expectations they’ve set for them! You’re in good company. The VH1 Blog has rounded up six of our favorite celebrity stage parents, who prove time and time again that even if you can’t make it in showbiz, you sure as hell can force your kids to live your childhood dreams! Success never tasted so sweet.

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1. Dina Lohan - Why not ruin one daughter when you can ruin two?! This week Lindsay‘s running around France forgetting what she learned in rehab, while Dina focuses on destroying Ali‘s youth with her new reality TV show. Both are clearly idiotic career movies for the girls. But you know what they say, mother knows best!
Read more…

R. Kelly: Mole or No Mole?

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(The VH1 Blog knows very little about the law. So we’ve solicited Ross Lampe and Mark Muro, founders of the California law firm Muro & Lampe, Inc., to keep a running tab on which side has the advantage in the R. Kelly child pornography trial. Check back for updates.)

Yesterday, R. Kelly’s attorney Sam Adam Jr. suggested that the sex tape is fake by asking a key witness for the prosecution (Simha Jamison) whether she’d seen the Wayans Brothers‘ movie Little Man. “They took the head of Marlon Wayans and put it on a midget, and it looked real,” said Adam. “Didn’t it?”

Well, human bodies can also be manipulated. Has the prosecutor considered the possibility that R. Kelly?s current mole is a cosmetic surgery prop? (Note the photoshoped mole on R. Kelly’s forehead above.) If I were the prosecutor, I would want to examine the mole immediately. If the Michael Jackson prosecution team was allowed to examine his penis for evidence of distinctive marks after being accused by a boy of sexual impropriety, then surely a back exam to determine the legitimacy of a mole is fair game. With tax-payer money no object, the prosecution may want to consider hiring a top notch cosmetic surgery expert to examine the mole. Such an examination is risky, though. If the mole is found to be legit, then the prosecution’s case could be doomed (insert your own catchy rhyme here).

The prosecution should at least hire a team of investigators to scour archive photos and video of Mr. Kelly, sans shirt, to look for the present blemish. If anyone has a photo showing R. Kelly?s bare back, with or without moles, taken prior to 1998 (the earliest the tape is believed to have been made), e-mail it here. Court is not in session today. The score remains +1 for the defense and +2 for the prosecution. — Ross Lampe, Attorney.

Ashanti’s Tips for a Bangin’ Summer Body

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Since it’s the unofficial start of summer, Memorial Day Weekend, when Ashanti stopped by the VH1 office, we knew we had to grill her on one topic in particular: her body. Ashanti’s weight has been the topic of much controversy in recent months, and in the video above, she sets the record straight on her eating habits, her fitness, the Page Six story that suggested she gained so much weight last year, she didn’t want to be photographed, the Master Cleanse and her body image. It’s actually a little amazing how open she is, considering how delicate the issue of weight can be to people. Ashanti’s looking svelte and better than ever, so pay attention: you might learn a few things.