A video of Lilith Fair staple Alanis Morissette doing her best Fergie impression showed up on YouTube this morning. The singer, known for her crunchy outlook, morphed the absurdist club banger "My Humps" by ubiquitous quartet Black Eyed Peas into a haunting piano dirge. Then made a video complete with booty shorts, head butts and plenty of ice. For real.
Call it the battle of the super-producers. Beat-whiz Timbaland (most recently of Justin Timberlake fame) has dissed Scott Storch (whose name is whispered enticingly at the start of one of those Paris Hilton songs). The New York Post reports that Timbaland was partying at New York club Marquee when the bad business went down. Apparently, Timba announced to the crowd, ?Scott Storch is a bitch!? He?s more eloquent on his song ?Give It to Me,? which has lyrics that go a little something like: "I get a half a mil for my beats/You get a couple grand. Never gonna see the day that I ain’t got the upper hand." But does he? Or is that sort of smack-talk the pre-emptive strike of an insecure Timbaland?
From the Department of Odd Pairings: King of Mope Robert Smith has teamed up with pop singer Ashlee Simpson to work on her next record, according to Ash’s not-at-all over-bearing dad/manager Joe. Excited? You’re not alone — rumored Ashlee paramour (and Cure fan boy) Pete Wentz told EW, "I doubt I had anything to do with it…But I definitely only have good things to say about Ash ? I think the collaboration could be great!" Could "Pictures of You [In Us Weekly]" be far off?
Which is the better collab: Ash and Pete or Ash and Robert Smith?
Photos: Ashlee Simpson
Nelly Furtado made her grand entrance to Sunday’s Juno Awards (Canada’s answer to the Grammys) from the ceiling, in a purported tribute to her first hit, 2001′s "I’m Like a Bird." Except, she looks more like a bat or maybe a marine animal after an oil spill. Seriously, the only bird she’s like is a scary-ass one. If she’s like a bird, she’ll only peck your eyes out.
Regardless of her fright factor, Nelly went on to host the show, perform and win five awards. After the ceremony, Nelly talked about the big night, saying, "I’m very much floating and flying without harness." How high is she?
More shots of the promiscuous bird after the jump. [Showbuzz/CBS News]
Pitbull in a Skirt
Hip-hop honey Eve talked to Giant magazine about sex tapes, making up with Lil Kim, interracial love, and more (Giant)
Former Roc-a-Fella crooner Rell was busted for receiving 50 pounds of weed in the mail (All Hip-Hop)
The Vagina Luda-logues
St. John’s said no to the Vagina Monologues, so Ludacris might have to say no to swearing when he performs at the NYC university (XXL)
Hova Comes Ova
Rihanna‘s new single, "Umbrella," featuring Jay-Z, is up on the web. The Bajan beauty is also the next Cover Girl. (SOHH)
Save Your Budget for Your Bling
The latest trend in hip-hop videos? Superstars going super low-budget. (MTV)
Sometime Police frontman Sting suffered a rather large diss last Wednesday at the hands of Paul Weller, the former frontman of the Jam and a person who is obviously suffering from irritable bowel syndrome. Weller was playing a gig at Royal Albert Hall in London when he spotted a picture of Sting playing the venue in 2000. The sight so incensed Weller that he spat on the photograph and was overheard saying, ?F*cking tw*t? as he walked away. Way to call it like you see it, Paul. Mr. Cranky Pants has a long history of insulting musicians. Here are a few recent hits:
On James Blunt: ?"I’d rather eat my own sh*t than duet with James Blunt.?
On Freddie Mercury: "He said he wanted to bring ballet to the working classes. What a c*nt."
Also on Sting: ?F*cking horrible man. Not my cup of tea at all. F*cking rubbish. No edge, no attitude, no nothing."
Paul Weller: More or less entertaining than a sock filled with cream cheese?
Timbaland‘s Shock Value drops next week, and apparently nobody’s more curious about how it’ll be received than the man himself. SOHH ran some video of Timba at his New York listening party, and while he seems to be in a good mood when introducing the album, once it actually gets rolling you can see him scanning the room to see how people are responding. (Relax, Tim. Those in the know are mostly diggin’ on your efforts.)
In other news, a former Timba collaborator received a little shock value of his own recently. The Game was called out by model/singer Vida Guerra during a radio show appearance. Guerra "rapped" (at least we think it was supposed to be rap) about the Game having none after he called her a video ho on his single, "Wouldn’t Get Far." Don’t expect to see these two "collaborating" any time soon.
Enviably pelted woodland creatures, PETA and Diddy’s babymama — J. Lo can now add Spanish-language record company Ritmo Latin to her list of sworn enemies. Ritmo has announced that its 50 stores in the New York area are boycotting Lopez’s latest, the Spanish-language Como Ama Una Mujer. Jenny from the Block recently returned to her Bronx hood to promote it offering select fans the opportunity to meet her at FYE. The fact that Lopez chose an "Anglo" store at which to promote her record enraged Ritmo President David Massry. "This is a Spanish-language CD, and if she wants to discriminate against the Latin community, then we will not sell her product," said Massry.
Last night?s White House Correspondents’ Dinner was a hootin?, hollerin? affair. President Bush warmed up the crowd with a few funnyisms, like when he joked about Senator Barack Obama?s ?sleek, hairless pecs.? Fun, right? Even funner: When the baby-faced Darth Vader of the current Administration, Karl Rove, one of the president?s most trusted advisors and the man who has frequently been called ?Bush?s brain,? got up on stage and rapped. He dubbed himself MC Rove and augmented his impromptu freestyling with some hippity-hoppity footwork – picture a cross between Lord of the Dance and what might happen were you to suddenly realize you were sitting in a pile of dogsh*t. [Continued after the jump.]
If Diddy‘s constant flossing and general tone of entitlement don’t gross you out, this might: the entrepreneur/rapper/partier recently revealed that he’s engaged in tantric sex with Kim Porter, his longtime love, now in more ways than one. Did says the marathon happened during a recent Paris trip: “We went up to my suite and had tantric sex for at least 30 hours, ordering up whipped cream and strawberries while we were at it. As meticulous as I am with my work, I’m more meticulous with lovemaking.” Does that mean he samples other people’s rhythms in bed, too?
Moving from insertion to withdrawal, the recent cancellation of Diddy’s London concert with Snoop Dogg has got Diddy down. “I am going through Snoop withdrawal right now,” he says of his would-be partner, whose law problems have resulted in a ban from England. “I miss him a lot.” Diddy doesn’t miss him; he just misses Snoop’s doggy style. [Mirror.co.uk]