The LA County District Attorney has finally filed charges against the road raging Lindsay Lohan, and the starlet appears to be getting off easy. Boooooooo. The charges are seven misdemeanors, including two counts of driving under the influence. No felonies were brought against the star for the cocaine that was found in her car, her pants and her bloodstream, which was “below the .05 grams required by office policy for felony filing.” So what does that mean, the coke had worn off? She probably drove into the curb trying to snort a fresh line. If Linds is found guilty of both DUIs she faces up to four days in jail (we hear Nicole Richie needs a cellmate!), and it sounds like they went easy on Linds because she’s young, effed up and has been in rehab three times. A source told TMZ, “Prosecutors in this county see a lot of kids in crisis. There are lots of kids struggling with addiction. The first sign of trouble usually involves a car. We’re not going to throw every one of them in prison. It doesn’t make sense.”
So jail her for making that craptastic stripper murder movie. That makes a whole lot of sense to us. [TMZ. Image: Getty]
Browse La Lohan Photos
Lindsay Caught Buying Beer in Rehab?
Lindsay?s Spa-Hab Vacation
If you think the continued roll-out of chapters in R. Kelly‘s “Trapped in the Closet” saga is insane, here’s something that’s crazier than crazy: R. Kelly reportedly plans to hit the road in October. The nutty part? His kiddie-porn trial doesn’t begin till Sept. 17.
R. Kelly’s camp hasn’t confirmed the tour — in fact, it was his supposed tourmate Keyshia Cole who let the news slip in an otherwise unrelated interview. MTV News points out that assuming that the trial lasts a standard four weeks, this gives him little time to rehearse. And, oh yeah, it also assumes he’ll get off innocent. Booking a tour the size that Kells’ will undoubtedly be when you don’t know if the headliner will be in jail or not is about as risky as filming your famous ass having sex with a minor and hoping that it won’t leak. But then, it would seem that Kells is a gambling man. [MTV News via Idolator]
Here?s What Else Is in R. Kelly?s ?Closet?
R. Kelly?s Expanding His ?Closet?
There’s only one thing we enjoy more than Britney being crazy, and that’s hearing new Britney music! Thankfully we have BOTHnot today. On the crazy front, Lady Spears – who is still at home in California and not peeing her way across Europe – is apparently so desperate to keep her sons that she is thinking of fleeing to London, Madonna style. She was also spotted by Life&Style magazine out at a Hollywood night spot recently looking down and depressed, and when pressed by the mag’s spy about her mood she replied, “My babies are my life.”
Poor thing. Check out her new song that leaked today and you’ll get a sense of the weird, dark place she’s currently living in. Brit actually belts it out pretty hard, when not bizarrely reenacting a phone call with K-Fed. She also apparently loves sampling beats from music boxes. The last line is definitely the best – is she talking about the sun in the sky or the son(s) her ex is trying to take away from her?
Listen to Britney’s new sad slow jam HERE and tell us what you think! Sucktastic or comeback worthy? [Image: Getty]
Britney Bolts to Belgium
Brit Makes Her Worst Career Move Yet
Britney’s Nutty, Naked Photoshoot
Pics: Christina Shows Off Baby Bump
She has yet to make an official statement but she doesn’t really need to, what with outfits like this. Xtina’s knocked up, yall! [IDLYITW]
Paris Spends Big Bucks on New Pad
The heiress has upgraded to a new $6.25 million pad in a gated corner of Beverly Hills. The manse comes with a gym and a wine closet, a clear upgrade from the stripper pole and monkey cage. [Us Weekly]
Jessica Alba Cuddling With Her Ex?
The starlet was spotted on a romantic beach stroll with ex-boyfriend Cash Warren. Apparently she likes to make thousands of grown men cry. [WWTDD]
Bridget Moynahan Gives Birth
Tom Brady’s ex gave birth to their son yesterday, and promptly named the kid ‘I Hate Giselle Bundchen’. [Ny Post]
Cameron and John Get Close in NYC
The couple take things slow but get closer at romantic spots around the city. It’s the summer of canoodling in the Big Apple. [Us Weekly]
Baby Bumpin’ Christina Cancels Tour
Paris Writes Another Book We Won’t Read
Jessica Alba Ruins A Man’s Life
You know those moments when you see a pic of a celeb with like, a giant zit, and you think to yourself, “Hey, celebrities are regular people – just like me.” Well this is NOT one of those moments. Kate Moss’ crazy sometimes-boyfriend Pete Doherty is a notorious drug addict (crack, coke, heroin – the usual), and now it seems like he’s gotten his kitties hooked on the stuff too. After his cat Dinger (which is junkie slang for syringe, apparently) had a litter of five kittens, one ended up sick. A blood test done by the veterinarian turned up – what else?! – cocaine in the cat’s bloodstream. I know he’s probably desperate for some pals to get high with, but animal cruelty is not the answer. Though it is kind of fun to imagine Pete making tiny straws out of gum wrappers for his kitties to use for snortin’. [SeriouslyOMG/Getty]
Kate Moss: Scared of Her Own Sex Tapes
Diddy?ll Be Missing His Girlfriend, Kate & Pete Part 27
Pete and Kate: John and Yoko?
Beyonc? can’t seem to keep herself off the internet. First it was her glorious tumble down a set of stairs on-stage, and now it’s this clip of her performing in concert and giving a nice shot of her lady bits to the audience…and us. We can’t quite make out if we’re seeing her actual Beyonc? breasts or a flesh colored bra. What do you see? [SOHH]
The pics below don’t reveal any flesh, but they’re still hot.
Blog Best-Of: Britney?s Boobies
Britney?s Nutty, Naked Photoshoot
Paris and Nicole Get XXX in Porno Flick