Spears vs Lohan: Who Strips Better?

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Rehab mamas like Brit and Linds are always flaunting their sexual sides. Spears lets it all hang out by leaving her thong at home, and with boytoy after boytoy in her wake, “Firecrotch” Lohan is about the hotness, 24-7. So of course it makes sense that the ladies have one key sex item in common: a stripper pole. During the video for “Gimme More,” itself an electro anthem of insatiability and “crazy positions,” the Toxic One is onstage at a bar, sporting black hair, black leather, and black fishnets. Her pouting and writhing comes from experience. In I Know Who Killed Me, the Mean Girl has a scene where she’s hired as a hostess of a “gentlemen’s” club but winds up doing the nasty with radically dark eyes, some tossed-around hair, and a full exposed libido. Exhibitionism is in the house, y’all.

What we want to know: which trainwreck do you think is hotter when working the pole? Check both of the videos and hit the comments section.

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Chris Brown: Sexin’ Up His Manager?

by (@katespencer)

Chris Brown and Tina DavisJust when we were getting totally turned off by Chris Brown‘s sugary sweetness, a wonderfully delicious scandal has dropped that makes him SO much more appealing! Chris, a singing and dancing machine with a PG – rating, is rumored to have been carrying on a sexual affair with his much older manager, and is reportedly in love with the woman, who was formerly a Senior VP at Def Jam. The romance is now supposedly disrupting Chris’ tour, and his mama, as expected, is PISSED, obvs. Her kid’s been getting busy with an older woman since he was 16, and now the affair is allegedly destroying his tour with Bow Wow – all in the name of Harold & Maude-esque love. Oh Chris, how we suddenly find you so much more appealing now. Kiss Kiss, indeed.

The singer has released a statement denying the whole thing, dropping the usual token phrases when these kind of rumors arise. He says, “Chris Brown and his manager Tina Davis have a strictly professional relationship,” the statement reads. “Ms. Davis has been instrumental in helping Chris achieve success as a multi-talented singer/dancer/actor. Rumors that the relationship goes beyond a working one are not only patently false, they diminish her efforts and his undeniable talents.”

Ya mean, her efforts and his talents in bed?

[SandraRose/SOHH/ Image: Getty]

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Tuesday: Eva’s a Spoiled Housewife

by (@katespencer)

eva-longoria-1204.jpgEva Longoria’s Free Shopping Spree
The actress got free sh*t for being famous so she bought her pals expensive shoes while shopping in NYC. Everyone wins! [NYDN]

Madonna & Guy: Red Carpet Bickering
This conversation reads just like that annoying fight you and your ex got in right before you broke up. We love foreshadowing! [NYDN]

Lauren Conrad Gets in Bikini Shape
The Hills star finally put all that free time to good use – her ass. [People]

Brad Pitt Reviving New Orleans
Mr. Angelina does good in Nola, donating his own cash and helping to build houses for people put out by Katrina. [NYDN]

Britney: Most Searched Person of 2007
Because we all can’t get enough of her constant meltdowns and hair messes, Brit is the number one Yahoo! search of the year. The number two search: ‘Isn’t everyone sick of Britney Spears yet?’ [Reuters]

Britney Spears Turns 26, Looks 46

by (@katespencer)

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Britney Spears is 26-years old ya’ll! What will the next year of her life bring – a changed pop star or more of the same of sh*t? We’re guessing by the way she went out on the town to celebrate her big day – decked out in a choker necklace from 1992, a tight dress that pinched all the wrong places and a broken shoe – that twenty-six is gonna be a delicious disaster for B. We can’t wait!
The singer crashed a party hosted by Sharon Stone in Bel Air for Scandinavian designers, and turned the fete into her own birthday bash, complete with cake, champagne, and the world’s most atrocious white fur coat. Brit hit up the gift suite and snagged $30,000 worth of furs, diamond jewels worth $10,000 and some sunglasses with price tags in the thousands. Free! Happy birthday indeed. Around 11:30 PM the biggest present of all arrived when Paris Hilton sashayed her way through the paparazzi. The former BFFs headed back to the Four Seasons hotel for some celebrating and champagne. We can only imagine that the two giggled and toasted to a new year full of botched lip injections. Happy birthday indeed, Brit!

Check out more pictures of Britney’s birthday night below!

[Images: Getty]

Remy Ma Takes On Vagina

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If you think a little thing like an attempted murder charge is going to shut Remy Ma up, think again. The outrageous hip-hop gangstress runs her mouth in the January/February issue of XXL, and the result is nothing short of her best performance in ages. Here are a few of her more…reckless quotes:

On women:

“I don’t like bitches. And I say ‘bitches,’ becasue if you have a p****, you’re a bitch. Even if you’re two-years-old. Like, look at this little bitch on the slide! Look at this little bitch with her Barbie in the playground!”

On how her life has changed since the attempted-murder charges:

“One of the first shows after it happened, I’m in the bathroom and this girl kept bumping into me. I’m like, normally this is when her face would go through the mirror. And if I put her face through the mirro, it’s like, ‘See, I told you she’s violent!’”

On her provocative fashion sense:

“I’d be getting dressed and getting my hair done, like, ‘The bloggers are gonna kill this outfit tomorrow.’ I’m wearing an orange sweat suit with lime-green spandex and f***in’ purple clogs and blue contacts, and I’m putting my bangs back blonde! I be getting dressed like, ‘Media Takeout‘s gonna have a field day tomorrow! Bossip, here I come!”

It’s somewhat comforting to know that possible jail time hasn’t made her any less of a mess, isn’t it? [Image: Getty]

Monday: Kim Kardashian Sheds Giant Tears

by (@katespencer)

kim-kardashian-1203.jpgKim K. Cries Over ?Stolen? Baubles
As expected, her tears are enormous and round. But seriously, where the eff is her jewelry – and the police report she should have filed about the incident? [NYP]

Britney Battles Rolling Stone
Her brain pops up to work, as the star plays hardball over a possible cover shoot for Rolling Stone. [NYP]

Pete Wentz Denies Bashing Indie Band
We should have known – Petey is way too cool to give a sh*t about some nameless band mocking his girlfriend (and way too smart to bring up Ashlee’s embarrassing jig-dancing past).? [NYDN]

Paris Hilton?s Plastic Lips of Horror
WTF happened to Paris’ lips? No seriously – what is going up there? Did a Jimmy Dean sausage latch on to the spot where her upper lip once was?? [DListed]

Madonna?s Kids Don?t Need Presents
Madge’s kids only get three presents on Christmas – because they get everything else they want on every other day of the year. [Ok!]

Thriller Turns 25, and Michael Jackson Invites Kanye West to the Party

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It’s been 25 short years since Michael Jackson released Thriller and changed the music industry forever. In the intervening years, the self-appointed King of Pop has undeniably been plagued with problems, but notwithstanding his biography, Thriller, which has gone platinum an astounding 27 times, remains an incredible collection of hit singles. You can’t deny it. And if you try to deny it, we’ll play you “P.Y.T.” or something and dare you not to dance. Good frickin’ luck.

The 25th anniversary edition of the album will feature the videos, the music, a live performance, and the help of a few friends: Kanye West, will.i.am and Akon. We’re looking forward to “Billie Jean 2008″ with Kanye in particular, though hearing what Akon has going on “Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’” is a fairly intriguing proposal as well. In unrelated news: the Francis Ford Coppola-directed masterpiece Captain Eo will not be included, much to all of our sadness.

The Weekly Wrap Up: New York Gets Personal, Britney’s Got Sticky Fingers

by (@katespencer)

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Lindsay Lohan Rid of Rehab Romance

by (@katespencer)

Well, is anyone surprised that this didn’t last? Lindsay’s rehab lover Riley Giles didn’t stand a chance against Hollywood hotties like Stavros Niarchos. Once Lindsay hit up Roberston Blvd, there was no chance in hell she was heading back to Utah to live in the mountains and shop with the common folk at Old Navy. Better luck next time Riley! Who knows – if you head back to rehab again you could end up with Britney Spears, she seems easier to sucker.

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[People]

Akon Charged for Tossing a Teen

by (@katespencer)

Konvicted! The rapper has been officially busted for throwing that scrawny kid offstage during a concert this summer, and cops in upstate New York have charged the rapper with a misdemeanor endangering the welfare of a minor and second-degree harassment. It’s probably nothing for Konvict, who’s already spent a total of five-years in prison, but it’s still a good reminder that when it comes to kicking (or throwing) some kid’s ass, you may want to think before you smack that. If you are desperate to relieve the rapper’s raucous toss, check out the video above. [TMZ]