Rob Schneider vs. Dina Lohan

by (@katespencer)

robschneider073007.jpgAfter his hilarious appearance last week on The Tonight Show dressed in drag as Lindsay Lohan, Rob Schneider was scolded by the starlet’s mom for making light of “a very serious situation concerning Lindsay.” Rob has fired back and it’s apparent that there are some very smart brains under that Lindsay wig. Hopefully Linds can hear his wise words in whatever Chateau Marmont suite she’s holed up in. Rob said:

“When Mrs. Lohan stops partying with her child, then I’ll have an ounce of respect for her. I don’t care if her parents are both crummy ? you cannot blame your parents anymore. She’s not a kid. Lindsay, get it together, America will forgive you but you gotta do something positive with your life. I hope she does okay but at a certain point, there’s so many bigger problems in the world than Lindsay Lohan. I hope she gets her head out of her nice, cute little rear end and finds a life for herself. She’s very talented, and a special little actress but there are so many people out there who’d trade positions with her in a heartbeat and use it better than she is.”

What do you think? Is Rob right or does Dina deliver? [People?/ Image: Getty]

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Paris an Heiress No More?

by (@katespencer)

paris073007.jpgThere’s a rumor floating around in the internet wind that Paris has been cut out of her grandfather’s will. Apparently Grandpa MoneyBags Hilton is mortified by his granddaughter’s behavior – sex tape, hoochie outfits, House of Wax, herpes, jail – and has decided to pass her $60 million inheritance on to charity. But not to worry – Paris makes a lot of money from that embarrassing behavior and should be able to support herself for at least few more years. Even though her show The Simple Life was canceled today, P just got cast in something called Repo! The Genetic Opera, which is a musical thriller. Now what’s so embarrassing about that? [Gawker, DListed?/ Image: Getty]

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Whitney Trips Out At, Hugs Publisher


whit_missed.gif Pop culture has seemed a little bit emptier without Whitney Houston (it’s been months since we’ve had anything to say about her). And so, it is with great joy that I present you this gem of an anecdote starring Whit, as related in the August issue of Sister 2 Sister. S2S publisher Jamie Foster Brown ran into Whitney at the star-studded opening of the Cove Atlantis’ grand opening in the Bahamas in May. It appears that Whitney was resplendent in finger wags and neck rolls. Hell to the yes. Jamie writes:

When I hit the island, S2S‘s June issue with Ray J on the cover was just hitting the newsstands. Who did I run into first? None other than diva Whitney Houston, who’d been Ray J’s rumored love interest for months. She was tripping out and yelling at me because she thought we had printed something negative about her in Ray J’s feature, though we had not. Then she said she’s a Christian woman so she was going to give me a hug. She did.

Soooo jealous that she received both a tongue-lashing and love from Whit in the same encounter! And how comforting is it to know that post-rehab Whitney’s still about as emotionally consistent as Taz? Her arbitrary freak-outs are virtually the only thing that’s kept her relevant this decade! And she’s still got it! In all: a satisfying story. Please don’t keep us waiting too long for the next, Whit! All you have to do is go outside and, like, do something. It’s bound to be gold.

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Britney: Meltdowns, Mom Drama and the End of an Era

by (@katespencer)

britneydivorce073007.jpgWe left Britney last week after her photo-shoot gone wrong for OK! Magazine, and now it appears the drama didn’t end there. Brit reportedly stomped on over to her video shoot and proceeded to do her usual routine of constant bathroom breaks followed by erratic behavior. She topped it off with a full on sobbing meltdown! You can check out the pics of her on the set in the world’s trashiest outfit. Looking like a washed up 40-year old stripper isn’t exactly what we imagined for Brit’s big comeback. If anything she looks worse in her video shoot than she does out and about.

This weekend her mama Lynne partied with teen daughter Jamie-Lynn after apparently aborting a failed mission to rescue Britney (from herself?) in Las Vegas. Hey if you can’t save ‘em might as well join ‘em, right?

But today is truly a historical day in Brit-story as it marks the official end of her marriage to the one and only Kevin Federline. The backup dancer is getting $15,000 a month in child support, $20,000 a month in spousal support through November, and custody will be split 50/50. Well played, K-Fed! Not bad for a few years of wedded bliss. At least you got Brit while she was still hot. [Image: Getty]

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Papa Simpson: Still Rockin’ the Creepiness

by (@katespencer)

jessicadad073007.jpgCheck out this quote from Jessica Simpson‘s dad and get ready for your skin to crawl a wee bit. He tells People that the strangest role his daughter was ever offered “was for Jessica to [play] a porn star,” he told the mag. “We were promised we would win an Oscar with that. I was like, ‘Eh, we’ll just buy a [statue of a] little man and keep our clothes on.’ ”

Isn’t Jessica kinda of porn star-ish already? Okay, okay, she’s not having sex on film, but remember that car washing video for “These Boots Were Made for Walking?” There’s something about dry humping a vintage Dodge Charger in a bikini with soap suds dripping everywhere that feels just a little dirrrty. As for winning an Oscar – don’t stop believing Papa Joe. It could definitely, possibly, maybe happen. Just probably not with her latest potential bomb. But surely that “little man” statue that Joe bought will make Jess feel all better about her crappy career picks! [People?/ Image: Getty]

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Usher Unravels, Cancels Wedding

by (@katespencer)

usher07307.jpgThere’s trouble in Usher’s paradise, as his much-hyped weekend wedding to Tameka Foster was canceled last minute on Saturday. His rep released an official statement revealing only that the nuptials were off, but rumors are rampant that the cancellation stemmed from a variety of drama. Usher’s mother Jonetta, who didn’t make the guest list, was vehemently against the wedding and may have convinced her son to call it off. Another battle for the couple was over what food to serve at their shindig. A source tells People that the pair, “had a lot of differences about the details. For example, the bride wanted barbeque, [and] he wanted to have [renowned chef] Jean Georges cook.”

Wow. If two people can break up that easy over food, imagine what kind of mess they’d be in with a kid?! Oh wait – Tameka and Usher are expecting a baby this fall. Yikes! Usher is now apparently home in Atlanta attempting to make peace with his estranged mother. “The reason he called off the ceremony is that he couldn’t go through with it without Jonetta,” said a NY Daily News spy. “He had an eleventh-hour epiphany.”

Or maybe he just realized that he really hates pulled pork and ribs.

What’s up with this guy?

[People, NY Daily News?/ Image: Getty]

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Monday: Janet and Mariah Compete; Justin and Jessica Canoodle

by (@katespencer)


Album Wars: Janet vs. Mariah
Uber-producer Jermaine Dupri is pitting Mariah Carey’s upcoming album against his girl Janet’s brand new joint, in hopes that the pseudo-competition will boost buzz and sales for both divas. JD’s producing Mimi’s new record too – isn’t Ms. Jackson a little jealous? [Mollygood]

Nicole & Joel: Fighting in Public
The dad-to-be reportedly unleashed his temper on his tiny lady friend, dropping a few F-bombs while the starlet stayed silent. Let’s hope they make peace before the baby arrives. [Star Magazine]

Super-sick Christina Cancels Gig
The little lady with the big voice had to cancel some stops on her latest tour to rest in bed with a bad case of the flu. [People]
Read more…

Bono & Penelope Cruz: Just Friends?


Penelope CruzSt Tropez does things to people. The sun, the surf: romance is everywhere. Which is why the gossip world is wondering if it did things to the actress Penelope Cruz and the married man Bono. The pair did the party thing recently (can you say 4 am?), and wound up looking ultra cozy as they bounced to and fro. Maybe he was just holding her hand to protect her from those nasty photogs…maybe. Leave your comment on whether you see sparks flying or hear hearts fluttering.

Britney Rides the Crazy Train to Vegas

by (@katespencer)

britsnewman.jpgLil’ Miss Wacky and her tiny tots have bailed on Los Angeles and headed to Las Vegas to do whatever it is a young mom and her two kids do in Sin City. G-Rated strip shows and gambling for goldfish crackers, probably. The only problem is, Britney is not supposed to have her kids out of state without K-Fed’s permission, which she did not have. Fed-daddy is p*ssed, and with good reason, it seems. His babies are probably riding Siegfried and Roy’s tigers right now!

Brit’s family vacation only got worse when her bodyguard put the smack down on a photographer at the Wynn Hotel, where the star was staying. Apparently the pap got too close to Sean Preston, and the bodyguard, JC Camera, freaked. Yes, his last name is hilarious in this situation. Camera was charged with a citation of battery, while Britney filed an “allegation of battery” against the photog on behalf of Sean Preston. Britney has since left the hotel, and has hopefully learned that if she wants to really keep the paparazzi away she should go to a remote vacation spot. Try Vermont over Vegas, girlfriend. [Image: Getty]

Nicole Will Spend 4 Days in Jail

by (@katespencer)

nicole.jpgPoor Nicole – always copying her pal Paris. First it was the bone-thin look, then the hair, now she’s pulling the “sneak off to jail when everyone leasts expect it.” The tiny starlet has headed off to court this morning (watch video of her arrival here) with a dapper looking Joel Madden attached at her side. Nicole is apparently going to plead either guilty or no contest to her DUI charge, and will then receive a minimum of five days in jail. Might as well get it out of the way before that baby really starts kickin’.

On a superficial note, Nicole looks totally bangin’ on her last day of freedom. Cute dress, nice big shades, and a hairdo worthy of a wedding. Kudos, my petite friend! A proper lady always go down in style. And her own pants. For more of Nicole in cute clothes, check out this behind the scenes video from Nylon of her photo-shoot for the mag’s cover.

UPDATE: Nicole was sentenced to four days in county jail, which she must begin serving by September 28th. She was also fined $2048, is on probation for 3 years, and must attend a 21 day alcohol education course. [TMZ. Booking Photo]