Thursday: Beyonce Browses Barefoot; Lindsay Skips Booze for Makin’ Out

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Beyonce
Jessica: Flirting with Dane Cook?
Simpson was spotted getting her canoodle on with the comedy hunk (and former co-star) at a recent Prince show. [Mollygood]

Beyonce’s Barefoot Shopping Spree 
The big-voiced diva got a bad rap amongst snobby shoppers at Bergdorf Goodman this past Sunday while shopping for shorts. Apparently Beyonce browsed barefoot, even though she wasn’t anywhere near the shoe department. [NY Post]

Brit Sends Love Letter to Paps
The always kooky Britney penned a sweet letter to the paparazzi, apologizing for that unfortunate umbrella beat down earlier this year. She sarcastically claimed to be preparing for a role – in the sequel to The Shining, perhaps? [X17]

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Nicole: Bun in the Oven is For Real?

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Nicoletwo
Both TMZ and In Touch Weekly are reporting that Nicole Richie is indeed knocked up, preggers, with child – whatever you want to call it. She still looks like she’s eating for none, but hopefully that’ll change soon, as she’s rumored to be three months along. She’s also apparently going to marry her rocker boyfriend/possible baby daddy Joel Madden sometime this summer. Richie may want to hurry it up, cuz that July 11 court date’s not getting any farther away.  Maybe they can kill two birds with one stone and tie the knot at the courthouse before her hearing.

If Nicole really is pregs, she’ll probably officially announce it on July 4th, when all us gossip fiends are off barbecuing and setting off fireworks. Remember Jessica and Nick’s Thanksgiving divorce announcement a couple of years ago? Celebs have a way of using the holidays to their advantage. [TMZ/In Touch Weekly]

Lily Lashes Out at Paris and Lindsay

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Lilyallen
It’s hard not to love Lily Allen, especially when she’s opening her big mouth. The British pop star,  Myspace blogger, and future jailbird rocked the Concert for Diana this weekend, but before she returned to her native land she had this to say to Intelligencer:

"I’m about to be arrested just as soon as I get back to England. I
punched a paparazzi in the face. There were 70 of them
surrounding me. And I left the country
the next day.They’re saying I’m going to be arrested as soon as
I get
back. I could be
Paris Hilton soon enough. Oh, my God, her life is so f***ing insane. She doesn’t even do anything. I can’t
wait until Lindsay Lohan goes to jail. ‘Boo hoo. I’m going to
jail.’
Good. Does that mean you’ll stop showing me your p**** now?"

Oh Lily, please don’t ever stop telling it like it is. And just so you know, a stint in jail does not mean that Lindsay will stop flashing her lady-thang 24/7. That freckled mess is here to stay. Welcome to America.

Courtney’s Sexy Hairballs

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Courtneylove
Courtney Love has posted a new track on her website, the first off her forthcoming solo release, Nobody’s Daughter. It’s called "How Dirty Girls Get Clean" and it’s unmistakably Courtney — lots of groaning, ominous atmospherics and what is very clearly Billy Corgan playing guitar. It’s a sad song, and it never really goes anywhere, but it’s also sort of intriguing. It starts with "I’ve lost my mind" and it never gets more optimistic than that. Take a listen. Does it sound like she’s coughing up a hairball to anyone else? And does she make hairballs sound sexy or what? 

New Couples Alert: Hot Chicks with Really Old Dudes

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Katehudson
Recently a slew of smokin’ ladies have been spotted looking cozy with men who are around twice their age – a trend as horrifying and gross as Ugg Boots worn in the summer. So just who is rumored to be doing the nasty with a geezer guy?

Kate Hudson: The adorable actress was spotted leaving her Paris hotel with Ron Burkle, the 60-year old supermarket billionaire and close pal of Bill Clinton. It’s not like her ex-husband – Black Crowes lead singer Chris Robinson - was much of a looker, but at least he had his wrinkles under control.

More ladies rockin’ it with the oldies – after the jump!

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Nick and Vanessa’s X-Rated Jacuzzi Jaunt

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Nickvanessa_xxx
Turns out the censored pics (kinda NSFW) Life&Style Magazine published of Nick Lachey and gal pal Vanessa Minnillo getting nekkid on the balcony of their Mexican villa are pretty tame compared to the rest of the photos snapped that day. Apparently there’s another batch that shows the pair gettin’ it ON in their jacuzzi, and a source tells TMZ that the images are “Paris sex tape-level scandalous.” Boooo. I was hoping for Kim Kardashian sex tape-level scandalous, but I’ll settle.

The lovebirds (and future porn stars) quickly got their attorney on the job, and notices have been sent to all the weekly gossip mags alerting them that if anyone publishes the sexy shots they’ll be slapped with lawsuits galore. So for now we can only imagine what kind of sexalicious insanity these two got into. It sounds wayyy more exciting the Nick’s ex-wife’s tear-filled trip to Mexico last month. Jealous much, Jess?

Jessica’s Blonde Ambitions Bomb

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Jessica Simpson‘s new movie, Blonde Ambition, is said to stink so bad that the film’s opening has been pushed back twice, and now may not come out at all. A source told the NY Daily News that "the release date was set for Aug. 3, and then it was delayed until the last week of August. Papa Joe then intervened and said he wasn’t comfortable with the level of competition from other films that month."

Her dad/manager/overall creepy dude may want to wise up to the obvious – that his precious baby girl just ain’t cut out for big screen success (Employee of the Month, anyone?). Jess needs to stick to what she’s good at – like going to the gym in cute outfits. Please enjoy the trailer to Blonde Ambition in the video above, and excuse us as we curl up into the fetal position and cry about Luke Wilson‘s crappy career choices.

Lindsay’s Sober Birthday Celebration

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Lilo
The starlet gathered family and friends
at a beach-front bungalow in Malibu yesterday for her 21st birthday bash, where the paparazzi caught Lindsay hanging with boozey ex Calum Best while dressed only in a bikini and the world’s nastiest pair of bright blue heels. Friends brought pricey gifts for the rehabbing actress, as they snacked and played volleyball while DJ and Lilo pal Samantha Ronson spun records. Fellow sobriety fan DJ AM stopped by, as did  her mom Dina (Cartier gift in hand), and Lindsay captured the festivities  – and the paps – on her giant camera. The party starting winding down around 2am and Lindsay ended her big day right where she had started it, at Promises Treatment Center. Pure Nightclub – eat your heart out.

Tuesday: Lindsay’s Movin’ Out; Paris is a Sucky Surfer

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Lc070307
LiLo Moves Out of Party Apartments
Sources say Lindsay has slowly been moving belongings out of her place in LA’s Sierra Apartments, home to wild parties and stars such as Fred Durst, Matthew Perry, and her ex Harry Morton. [NY Daily News]

Drew Locks Lips with Zach Braff
Ms. Barrymore was spotted all over NYC this weekend, making out at various downtown hot spots with resident singleton and Mandy Moore ‘s ex, Zach Braff. [Gawker]

The Hills? LC Scores Paris? Ex
It’s sloppy seconds for the Teen Vogue intern and reality star, as she’s caught leaving an LA nightclub holding hands with Josh Henderson, Paris’ pre-clink cutie. [NY Daily News]

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Timbaland Getting His Gold Watch Soon?

by (@katespencer)

Timba_2 Uber-producer Timbaland is throwing in the towel. In a recent interview with Gigwise, Tim (real name Timothy Mosley) bemoaned the state of the music industry, stating: “Music is boring right now. I’m too innovative for the world.” Tim then goes on to explain how he’ll “de-crown” himself and let some of the up-and-comers have a shot. “They won’t be able to be me,” Tim explains. “There’s only one Timbaland.” We here at VH1.com put Tim’s retirement party sometime after he finishes touring with Justin Timberlake, produces Madonna’s album, and quits writing all those songs with Simon LeBon for the new Duran Duran record. Which is pretty much never. We’re also elevating Tim to orange on our “Egomanic Alert” guide, for referring to himself in the third person.

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