by (@unclegrambo)

Kim Kardashian Eschews Both Subtlety And Innuendo In New Music Video

Thanks to the vocally-challenged likes of Heidi Montag and Paris Hilton, musical vanity projects emanating from the reality starlet universe already have a pretty poor reputation. However, this already disreputable genre is about to get a downgrade that makes what Standard & Poor did to the US credit rating look like small potatoes.

A 55-second snippet of Kim Kardashian‘s previously-thought-to-be-shelved singing debut, “Jam,” emerged yesterday on the KimKardashianMusic YouTube channel in the form of a music video. It features the recently married sex tape star crawling around on all fours in what looks to be a neon-lit air shaft, all the while licking her cherry red lips in slo-mo and shaking her oiled-up tailfeather in a way that would make Nelly, P. Diddy and Murphy Lee proud. There is no pretense of “art” in it whatsoever; rather, it’s so blatantly over the top with how it presents Kardashian as a sex object that it makes Warrant‘s treatment of Bobbi Brown in “Cherry Pie” look positively chivalrous by comparison. That said, this “leaked” video managed to rack (heh heh) up 2.2 million views in the last 24 hours, so clearly she must be doing something right.

Remember Kardashian’s Pop Career? Kim’s Shelved Music Video Leaks [Reality Rocks/Yahoo]

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Ke$ha Reveals Her “Un-Auto-Tuned” Voice On Team Coco News

Ke$ha and Conan O’Brien are really running with their collaboration. When she returned to his show on Monday for its summer concert series, she also curated her own installment of It Came from the Intertubes (a Best Week Ever-type feature that Conan’s site launched last month), and taped the above sketch about Auto-Tune. Gags about the oft-used software are a little played out, but voice modulation is always at least a little funny, and Ke$ha really sells it, so it works. She neighs!

She also takes the opportunity to slip a little actual criticism into the bit. After facetiously explaining that Pavarotti, Bob Dylan (ha!), and The Beatles all used Auto-Tune, she flatly intones, “Being against Auto-Tune is like being against the idea of a DJ. It just lets people know you’re old.”

And on that note, here’s Dylan rapping the first verse of “Mama Said Knock You Out”: