It’s the holiday season, and in the immortal words of Andy Williams, “Whoop-de-doo and dickery dock, and don’t forget to hang up your sock.” Yes, it’s the time of year when the limited daylight starts to get to us and we go a little nuts. As a result, we do weird things like stick a tree in the middle of our living room, wear retina-damaging sweaters, and drink egg-nog (which is pretty gross, let’s be real). But we also sing songs that we’d probably find pretty creepy at any other time of the year. So with that in mind, let’s walk together in a winter wonderland of wayyyy unsettling holiday songs!
Blasphemy! But someone had to do it. Everyone calm down, I’m not saying that you can’t play Mariah Carey‘s “All I Want For Christmas Is You” until your iPod breaks. All I’m saying is that there is so much more out there in terms of cheerful spirited holiday-themed music that is both modern and mostly listenable.
Let’s put aside our differences and agree that lists are fun. They are also only definite if you actually add them to your holiday playlist. SO: WILL YOU?
Happy Holidaze! In lieu of the traditional advent calender stocked with stale chocolates or tiny toys, VH1, MTV and CMT are gearing up and counting down the days to Christmas with 12 Holidaze worth of cheer. Each day until the 25th, we will unveil a new holiday-themed performance from some of your favorite artists. First up: Paloma Faith, singing the Christmas classic “Santa Baby”!
Anybody can get twelve drummers drumming, but few can fill us with a reto-sheened cheer quite like Faith can. The rising British songstress and The Voice UK coach has a voice that has earned her comparisons to Amy Winehouse and Adele, and a look that’s a little Joan from Mad Men and all the rest entirely her own (we’ve mentioned it already, but you should really take a look at that carcass necklace!), and this Christmas classic from 1953 is just perfect for her. It’s a teensy bit jazzy and just brimming with the warm and crackly cheer that’s sure to lure Santa down the chimney right quick.
Ok, so what DMX doesn’t know how to Google his name! And who cares that he doesn’t like the word itself, “What the f— is a Google?” He knows the words to “Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer,” and watching him sing it makes everything right in the world. Read more…
In “All I Need Is Love”, which will forever be known as “Wait, remember that Christmas song CeeLo did where he used The Muppets theme song?” everyone’s celebrating the holiday with gifts and cheer. One Muppet even got an iPhone:
It’s officially the day after Halloween which means we’re only two months away from the holidays. For the inherently festive that means: Christmas music. Naturally, America’s jolliest soul singer, CeeLo Green, has officially released his contribution to the Christmas canon. A Christmas album gives an artist to truly live eternally, piped through the speakers of a Bloomingdales during the holiday shopping rush, as Mariah Carey‘s “All I Want For Christmas” has been for the past 100 years. Will CeeLo join the greats in Xmas eternity? Let’s go over the track list and see. Does CeeLo have the festivity it takes?
In one of the best parodies of the year, the Cunningham brothers (Chip Chantry and Tommy Pope) have donned Christmas sweaters, a Santa hat and one amazing handlebar mustache for their Hall & Oates satire album Deck The Hall & Oates. With lyrics like, “He’s a reindeer and his nose is red and the other reindeer well they don’t play / You can’t deny you’re a misfit Rudolph!” set to the tune of “Rich Girl,” the album is full of clever adaptations, cheesy retro throwback montages and plenty of giggles (yours, of course). Other favorite tracks of ours include “King Of The Jews” and “Your Kiss (Is On My Christmas List).” But really, we just can’t get our eyes off that handlebar mo — the Cunningham brothers make a delightfully realistic (while being just a tiny bit off) version of pop legends Daryl Hall & John Oates.
And if that’s not enough Hall & Oates for you this Christmas, you can get the full, immersive experience by calling the Hall & Oates hotline. Yep, you read right. So dial 719-26-OATES to complete the Hall & Oates Christmas experience — you’ll then be prompted to pick out of 4 Hall & Oates songs to listen to. Who needs Spotify?
We’re starting to think that maybe Michael Bubléis Christmas. Is that even possible? With his Christmas album holding tight at #1 on the charts, Michael Bublé is the only name you need to know this Christmas (apart from Santa, of course). This weekend on Saturday Night Live, Bublé not only performed a classy, romantic rendition of “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” (after the jump), but he also got his very own sketch and imagined Duets album (above). It’s the perfect way to start your Monday morning, because if you don’t laugh out loud at the winking, dancing Justin Bieber (Jimmy Fallon) parody, or giggle at Taylor Swift‘s over awed gaping mouth (Kristen Wiig) then you’ve got a heart so cold not even Bublé can help you this holiday season.
Merry Christmas, Michael Bublé! Bubés (which, btw, is our own personal nickname for him) has sold 480,000 copies of his Christmas album this week, which keeps him at the #1 spot on the Billboard charts — the seventh, and highest selling week, in the album’s shelf life. The album has sold 1.5 million copies in total and could potentially surpass Lady Gaga‘s Born This Way to be the year’s second-best selling album. So it seems that consumers are really getting into the festive spirit by way of music — but strangely enough the album hasn’t received the sort of critical attention or accolades that Born This Way, or say, Adele‘s 21 have. But still — with what’s turn out to be a faster-than-the-speed-of-light sprint at the end of the game, Bublé has managed to outstrip artists whose albums have been available for months. Talk about Christmas wishes coming true.
Avril Lavigne has matured quite a bit since her early mall pop days with The Matrix, both as an artist and as a person. Her maturation is on full display in this somewhat jarring yet supremely entertaining new video from our friends over at MTV Buzzworthy, a video which shows a newly domesticated Lavigne decorating Christmas cookies, of all things!
Don’t get it twisted, though: Martha Stewart, she is not. Her trademark sense of style—remember when Avril did Head-To-Toe with us earlier this year?—has not wavered one bit, even as her skills in the kitchen have rapidly progressed. In fact, according to the video, Avril has even started cooking (“Italian!”) for her band when they’re out on the road together. Here’s hoping somebody saved that snowman cookie for us!