Breathe easy, folks. The Los Angeles Times is reporting that biggest selling artist of 2011, Adele, underwent successful vocal cord surgery in Boston yesterday. According to a jargon-laced statement from Massachusetts General Hospital, “Adele underwent vocal cord microsurgery by Dr. Steven Zeitels to stop recurrent vocal cord hemorrhage (bleeding) from a benign polyp. This condition is typically the result of unstable blood vessels in the vocal cord that can rupture … Dr. Zeitels expects Adele to make a full recovery from her laser microsurgery.” LASERS!
Two weeks ago, Adele canceled all of her planned 2011 concert dates to prepare for her encounter with Dr. Zeitels, who is something of an expert in this field. He successfully treated Aerosmith lead singer, American Idol judge and zeitgeisty 2011 Halloween costume-inspirer Steven Tyler back in 2006 after he was suffering from a similar ailment. We wish Adele a speedy recovery, and look forward to her getting back to bowling us over with her awesome vocal talent as soon as she’s up to it.
Adele prognosis after vocal cord surgery is good, her doctor says [Booster Shots/LAT]
[Photo: Getty Images]
Halloween is coming up and it’s time to start getting serious about costumes if you don’t want to be a sexy [insert noun here] or a regular-person-but-just-covered-in-blood-because-that’s-all-you-had-time-to-buy. This Halloween dare to be a little bit braver, a little more irreverent, and a little more clever with your costumes. That’s right folks — no more Lady Gaga get ups, lest you be deemed “like, sah 2010!” There’s a wealth of cultural reference at your disposal this year, with 2011 being renamed the Chinese Year Of The Meme (it hasn’t really, I just said that to get your attention). We’ve picked out some of our favourite musical memes of the year in the hopes that you’ll be inspired to trick yourself out in the spirit of a wickedly self-aware Halloween…
Why? Only the baby of hip-pop royalty Jay-Z and Beyoncé could become an Internet meme and every GIF aficionado’s wet dream before the little tyke is even born. Barely beyond conception, Baby Bey-Z hit the Internet harder than “Friday” (see below) and made “Pregoncé” a word faster than you can say, “I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly.” For Halloween, go as Pregoncé in the costume she wore at the VMAs earlier this year when she
unleashed unveiled her newly rounded belly to the world.
How? We’ll start from the top down: first you need some crazy 70’s flicked blonde hair, wig it if you’re a brunette or a dude, and if you’re already blessed with the golden tresses, heat up those rollers, girl! Next you’ll need a white shirt (stuffed with a pillow, of course we don’t expect you to actually get pregnant) and black pants; easy. The sparkle blazer might be a bit harder. I suggest taking a cheap / second hand blazer, a can of spray on glue, a butt-load of glitter and having the absolute time of your life. Add some velcro to the inside of the blazer so it’s easy to rip open over the course of Halloween as you constantly re-enact the big reveal. Carry around a fake microphone so you can throw it down dramatically before you rub your belly emphatically and smile, smile, smile!