Imagine how invincible it must feel to be a movie star, top athlete, supermodel, or gazillionaire reality star (sigh, it is what it is) — you must think you can do anything, right? Next stop, rock star fabulosity! Thing is, a music career ain’t so easy to pull off — and these A-listers found out the hard way.
In honor of the Sex and the City movie opening this weekend and the awful frocks its stars have worn in episodes of the hit HBO show, we’ve gathered the best of the worst fashion flops to ruin Hollywood this year. Not everyone can star in the greatest chick flick of our time, but you sure can dress like you’re straight out of the movie!
From the left: Sarah Jessica Parker and pals (Coco, Heidi Montag, Paris Hilton, Katie Holmes, Tyra Banks, Rumer Willis, Jenna Jameson, Anna Wintour) model their poor picks in crap couture.
I was just sitting here minding my business, when I noticed this little tidbit coming across the web about Paris Hilton and her twin boy toy Benji Madden. The Good Charlotte guitarist has written his lover of two months her own song, titled, “Shine Your Light.” Paris says, “It’s this really beautiful love song about me. It was the sweetest thing that anyone has ever done for me….He’s my best friend.”
BEST FRIEND? I thought that was the position I’d be competing for on her reality show! W.T.F. Just to show my devotion to the heiress, I’ve written her an even better song. It’s called “Dump Your Boyfriend and Let’s Hang and Do Shots.” Here’s a sample lyric:
Seriously Paris, forget that dude
He’ll never appreciate your attitude
Let’s share clothes, here’s my dress from 1993
aren’t you glad you’re BFF with me!
Check out my blog and vote for me to be Paris Hilton’s best friend!
Why is it that rich people can’t afford to pay someone to give them good ideas? Paris and Nicole are allegedly plotting to marry their twin boyfriends in a ceremony together, followed by a honeymoon in a pile of cash earned from the publicity wedding stunt. A source says, “Paris is doing it all for attention, as usual. It?s a publicity stunt, just like everything else.”
Let’s see, just like her other two(three?) engagements, her lost dog, her sex tape, her album, her perfumes, her various reality shows, her hair extensions, her jewelry line, her nightclubs, her book, her feud with Nicole/Lindsay/Britney, and her stint in jail? Yep, sounds like Paris! But haters beware – she’s been spotted wearing some sort of ring on her finger! Maybe it’s a purity ring! Paris Hilton taking a vow of chastity? Now THAT would be a publicity stunt. [DListed]
It’s like the democratic primary in Hollywood, but drunk on fancy vodka! Lindsay and Paris’s beef with each other escalated recently, after LiLo stepped into take over hosting duties from BritBrit at an event at the Scandinavian Style Mansion (we’re still not really clear on what this place is). Linds was all chill until she realized that the goods she was hawking at the party included handbags made by her frenemy Paris Hilton. Uh oh! She got pissed and bolted, and guess who stepped in to take over the twice-abandoned hosting gig? None other than Ms. Paris herself. The dude who organized the event had this to say about the feuding females, “I?m grossly disappointed in Lindsay for not fulfilling her contractual duties. But Paris truly saved the night. She was very gracious to everyone – and was the life of the party.?
Last month the girls battled over Timbaland’s affections, this month’s it’s Sweden. Who knows what April will bring!
Paris, Paris, Paris. We ALL know you’re dating Good Charlotte rocker Benji Madden. We’re well aware that he is the identical twin brother of Nicole Richie‘s BF and baby-daddy, Joel Madden. And yes, the whole world knows that this is quite possibly the creepiest love-quad ever, and that if you all marry each other the earth will likely implode. So do you really need to rock a massive ring decorated with your man’s initials spelled out in hundreds of tiny diamonds? I mean, really. Subtlety is a nice touch. You should try it some time.
[All images: Getty]
Well look what we have here! It’s the world’s dumbest – and most dysfunctional – love triangle! Poor Timbaland has found himself trapped between two dueling dimwits – Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton. Both the girls are desperate to give their music “careers” another try, and the divas duked it out at the super-producer’s pre-Grammy party for his attention. Each was also horrifed that the other was in attendance, with Lindsay allegedly declaring, “What the hell is that b*tch doing here?? when she saw the heiress. Paris’ response? ?F*ck off, you b*tch.?
Wow. Those words are gonna sound even more amazing when sung and put to music! A source reveals that both of the women “want to work with Timbaland to revive their faltering music careers,? and had seen this party as away to get him on their side. Lindsay already has Ne-Yo on board, which seems to signify that she’s serious about singing. Paris, on the other hand? She’s probably just trying to get closer to Justin Timberlake. [MSNBC]
Fergie Plans Shotgun Wedding
What’s she gonna do with her lovely baby bumps? Walk down the aisle asap so no one notices that she’s preggers. [NY Post]
Nicole Can?t Stop Post-Baby Partying
You’d get out of the house too after lugging a baby around for 9 months. Mom power! [Us]
Paris Loses Her Pussy
Don’t get your hopes up – we’re talking about her cat. She left it at the vet and hasn’t picked it up in weeks, so it’s going back to a shelter. [TMZ]
Brit?s BFF Sam Tried to Take her Cash
Note to Britney – that’s what people who randomly come into your life when you’re vulnerable really want. [Us]
Natalie Cole Bashes Winehouse?s Win
The aging diva thinks Amy shouldn’t have won a Grammy (or five) until she’s sober. If the Grammys followed this rule, no one in the biz would ever win anything (um, including Natalie?).
Paris Hilton?s Movie Not Hot at Box Office
Her unfunny flick The Hottie and the Nottie made no money over the weekend, which is wonderfully hilarious. [TMZ]
Ashton Celebrates his B-Day with Bruce
Next time you think your family is weird, just imagine Bruce Willis eating cake with his hands at his ex-wife’s husband’s 30th birthday party. Feel better?? [NYDN]
Is Scarlett Engaged to Alanis? Ex?
The actress (who dates Ryan Reynolds) was spotted wedding dress shopping with her mom, fueling engagement rumors.? [NYP]
Britney?s B*tchy Grammy Commentary
We’re so glad Brit’s out of the hospital, so she can charmingly tell the Grammys to kiss her ass. British Britney is just pissed she didn’t get a nod for Best New Artist.? [TMZ]
Amy Finally Fixes that Tooth
Eff all her awards, her dentist should win an prize for that work.? [DListed]
Cam Diaz?s Dance Off
The awkward actress got into it on the dance floor with a fellow patron of a NYC club. Where’s Drew Barrymore when you need back up on jazz hands?? [NYP]
Katharine McPhee Married at 23
So what if she didn’t win Idol – we don’t see Taylor Hicks walking down the aisle! In fact, we don’t see Taylor Hicks anywhere. Kat wins!? [People]
Sam Lutfi Talks Sh*t About Brit?s Fam
What a surprise – Brit’s creepy pal is bashing her parents to the press, calling them crazy. When it comes to that drama, who around Britney is actually sane?? [Us]
Michelle Williams Talks About Heath
The actress breaks our hearts with this statement about her “heartbroken” state following Heath’s death.? [Us]
Paris Hilton: ?I?m not gay!?
World to Paris: “We don’t care!”? [TMZ]