Whether inanimate objects, national landmarks, or pretty much any food item in general, artists sure do love using their witty ways to talk about sex. See, they try to hide the meanings of these songs – but we just couldn’t help but cracking their code! Plus, most are blatantly obvious (hint: any long and hard object is most likely referring to a guy’s…..get it? Good.)
Picture this: You walk into your local newsstand to pick up your favorite magazine and BAM! You spot a cover that stops you in your tracks. Your jaw drops, your eyes twitch, and you think, “Can I really be seeing what I think I’m seeing?” Of course you can! Rock and roll rebellion can’t be tamed by mag editors!
Food and sex have a weird relationship. In a lot of ways they don’t go together at all, but when they work it’s like peanut better and jelly. Music videos have been accused of hyper-sexualizing pretty much everything over the years -even making a sandwich, having an ice cream, or eating an orange! Something about food really plays well on the small screen, and nobody knew it better than the lovely Kelis. She rewrote the menu with her unforgettable video for “Milkshake” in 2003, and now she’s back on the beat again with her new album, F.O.O.D. It’s out this Tuesday, and each track is named after a different delicacy. Her single “Jerk Ribs” is the appetizer, but we can hardly wait for the main course!
To whet our appetite, we’ve decided to take a look at the most delicious inappropriately sexual uses of food in music video history. Bon appetit!
Spring is in the air, and that means one thing: Pollen! But once those allergies wear off, it means that spring fever is sure to take hold. You know what we’re talkin’ about. It’s that time of year when the warmer temperatures heat everything up, and folks start getting a little frisky. ‘Tis the season when new couples are born, but first you gotta take the first step and SPEAK to that special someone. Don’t worry if you’re shy- just borrow one of these fool-proof lines from popular songs. They’ll be sure to melt any heart!
Kids’ songs are not the same anymore, and it’s kind of creepy… Read more…
A man walked by me in a bikini. This was nothing out of the ordinary -it’s Midtown Manhattan, after all- but it was 35 degrees and raining. This swimwear required commitment. “I’m not even cold,” he said to no one in particular before linking arms with a wand-wielding mermaid. They were heading to the back of the line, which snaked from the entrance of the Roseland Ballroom across three whole blocks. In a sport coat and slacks, I was very much the one who stuck out. All around me were wigs of ever conceivable (and inconceivable) shade, leather dominatrix gloves, tutus, ninja masks, neon spandex, enough eye glitter to choke a unicorn, and (unforgivably) crushed velvet jackets. Many wore hats, sold in the Ballroom lobby, emblazoned with the three-word reason why 3,500 of us all braved the wind and rain and Monday morning hangover: Lady F-cking Gaga.
Jumping around onstage can really do a number on your stomach, and it definitely doesn’t take much to push it past the point of no return. Whether it’s a hangover, dehydration, food poisoning, or just good old fashioned stage fright, sometimes musicians have to just…let it go. All over the stage. And the front row, if they’re not lucky. But -much like their lunch- you just can’t keep these pros down. The show must go on!