by (@katespencer)

Amy Winehouse Isn’t Even Trying

Amy is back and more effed up than ever. Her performance at last night’s MTV Europe Music Awards is like Britney’s VMA disaster without the laughs (and bikini). It’s only more painful to watch her exuberant back up singers/dancers jam beside her as she teeters on-stage, gripping the mic for balance. The girl is so seriously incoherent and messed up that she probably walked offstage after her wobbly performance and passed out. We’d normally point out that her denim dress from 1992 borders on fashion faux pas territory, but that’s the least of our worries. This isn’t the first time Amy’s delivered a rough performance at an awards show, which is what makes this sorry showing so sad. It’s only that much more heartbreaking that while she’s singing about going “back to black,” she’s fading onstage. Words becoming life only make the whole thing worse. Someone help! [ via DListed]

 

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Amy’s Arrest: At Least It Wasn’t Smack

amy_winehouseTroubled soul chanteuse Amy Winehouse was arrested in Norway yesterday when police received an anonymous tip that she and her husband (the U.K.’s answer to Kevin Federline) were in possession of marijuana. The couple was hauled in, along with an unidentified person, after 7 grams of weed were found in their hotel room. Yesterday all the Internets were aflutter with rumors of domestic violence and crack pipes, but it turns out it was just a little smoke. Back in August, Winehouse was found in her hotel room with a hooker and some blow, so we actually feel she’s on the road to recovery.

Just before a recently rehabbed Winehouse embarked on her rescheduled European tour, she recorded a duet with Pete Doherty, a worthy opponent for Winehouse in the battle for the title of Toxicologist’s Worst Nightmare. The song, called “1939 Returning,” is allegedly set for release later this month.

by (@katespencer)

Monday: Jessica’s Million Dollar Zits

jess1015.jpgLindsay Ditches Hollywood for Utah
The starlet is apparently moving to Utah full-time to escape the LA grind. Let’s hope Paris and Britney follow suit. [People]

Jessica Simpson Gets Rich Off of Acne
The “actress” is reportedly set to make $3 million from her endorsement deal with ProActive skin care. Proof that she should skip acting and stick to what she knows — zits? [NYP]

Rihanna?s Latest Celebrity Crush
RiRi sets herself up to become to new “it” girl (or Britney Spears junior) and hooks up with man whore Josh Hartnett, 10 years her senior. [Us]

Amy Winehouse Back on Stage

The booze-loving prodigy is set to sing at the Woodie Awards next month in NYC. Lock up your liquor stores, Big Apple! [NYDN]

Ashlee: Binging on Botox?
Jessica’s little sis denies using botox on her beat face, but her wrinkle-free mug seems to say otherwise. Maybe she’s just been borrowing her sister’s Proactive?? [Us]

by (@katespencer)

The Weekly Wrap Up: Mya Drops, Amy Flops, Common Gives Props

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by (@katespencer)

Monday: Paris Has a Big Mouth, Rihanna Has Two Moon Men

rihanna_vmas.jpgMischa?s Nonexistent Nipple Slip
The O.C. star’s rep says claims of a nipple slip are untrue because no photographic evidence exists. Knowing Mischa and her flashing ways, we believe it without any proof. [NYP]

Rihanna and JT Snag VMA Awards
Amidst all the fights and flops, these two stars pocketed a couple Moon Men each for actually having a little talent. You paying attention, Brit? [People]

Lindsay Looks Hot in Rehab
While her celeb pals partied in Vegas, LiLo looked adorable hanging with her new rehab buddies in Utah. Blink and you might confuse her for a normal 21-year old. [X17]

Paris Blows Xtina?s Baby Secret
The ditzy heiress revealed to the crowd at a Vegas bash that the Xtina’s knocked up, even though she has yet to confirm that she’s with child. Paris called her “the most beautiful pregnant woman in the world.” Think Nicole’s a little bit hurt? [Us Weekly]

Amy Winehouse?s Money Hungry Dad
The singer’s pop is trying to snag her money in order to prevent Amy (or her skeezy husband) from blowing it on drugs. Maybe he should try to take her cocaine away from her first? [Mollygood]

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Amy Winehouse Strips Down, Achieves Brilliance

It’s so easy to get caught up in the saga of Amy Winehouse that you can often forget why you paid attention to her in the first place: her music. As though in direct response to the chaos that’s swirled around her all summer, the singer’s first post-rehab appearance at Tuesday’s Mercury Prize ceremony in London was shockingly stark. Amy appeared on stage with just one man lightly plucking his guitar in accompaniment to her preternaturally weathered vocals. Here, singing “Love Is a Losing Game,” Amy does what she does best, balancing coolness with gut-wrenching emotion…or maybe she’s just making being emotional look cool. Proof of the song’s title is scratched all over Amy’s public profile, which is why this understated performance is so beautiful: we’re treated to an unlikely moment when Amy’s demons have seemed to settle. For these three minutes, everything is OK in the Winehouse universe and that feels monumental. All things considered, this really could be the performance of her career so far.

Though nominated, Amy didn’t end up taking home the Mercury Prize (that went to nu-ravers the Klaxons), but we’d be hard-pressed to call this return to form anything but winning. It’s magical. [Via Dlisted]

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by (@katespencer)

Amy Winehouse’s In-Laws Beg for Boycott

amyvaca082807_2.jpgYup, that’s the latest plan presented by Amy’s hubby’s dad. He told the BBC on Tuesday that Amy’s “addiction and her behavior are not acceptable,” and suggested that fans send a message to the singer. “Perhaps it is time to stop buying records,” Giles Fielder-Civil said. “It’s a possibility, to send that message.”

Great idea, Pops. Kind of as smart as checking out of rehab, doing drugs with a call girl, getting in a big, bloody fight and then jetting to an undisclosed Bahamian island for some R&R. Cuz that’s exactly what Amy and her fellow addict/husband Blake Fielder-Civil are doing RIGHT NOW. See? They didn’t need an intervention – they needed a Bahamavention. [Image: Getty]

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by (@katespencer)

Monday: Paris Chops Her Hair Off; Britney Speeds and Pleads with Cops

paris_082707.jpgBrangelina: The Perfect Big Apple Family
The perfect Pitt-Jolie posse have taken NYC and the city’s parks and playgrounds by storm. They win “the coolest tourists” award for this week. [Just Jared]

Paris Lets Her Short Hair Hang
The heiress has chopped off her extensions and was spotted debuting her new Katie Holmes-like bob at her latest house party, where Kid Rock was a guest. Let’s hope she at least donated her unwanted locks. [DListed]

Is Madonna?s New Track a Rip-Off?
Madge’s new track supposedly sounds a lot like Britney’s “I’m a Slave 4 U,” which would make Madonna the only person in America still trying to copy the lost pop princess. [NY Post]

Winehouse: Caught with Crack Pipe?
Amy was apparently spotted getting high with a crack pipe in hand in the bathroom at the Chicago Lollapalooza show. Just her regular ol’ pre-show ritual, it seems. [NY Daily News]

Britney Pulled Over for Speeding
The starlet got a scolding by cops for speeding but got off without a ticket after using the old “the paparazzi were chasing me” excuse. It’s good to know that crazy celebs still get star treatment. [DListed]

by (@katespencer)

Crazy Talk: Celebrities Say the Darndest Things

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Every day we’re amazed at the ridiculous things that come out of the mouths of famous people. We’ve rounded up the best of this week’s wackiest celeb statements for your reading pleasure, straight from Jamie Foxx, Amy Winehouse, and a slew of your other favorite stars. Enjoy their wise words – and your sanity.

  • “If they’re using dry paper, they aren’t washing all of themselves. It’s just unclean. So if I go in a woman’s house and see the toilet paper there, I’ll explain this. And if she doesn’t make the adjustment to baby wipes, I’ll know she’s not completely clean.” ? Terrence Howard, detailing to Elle Magazine why he will only date women who use baby wipes after going to the bathroom. [DListed]
  • ?Blake is the best man in the world. We would never ever harm each other. Take back what you said on the blog. I thought you was my girl. I was cutting myself after he found me in our room about to do drugs with a call girl and rightly said I wasn?t good enough for him. I lost it and he saved my life.? - Amy Winehouse in a text message to blogger Perez Hilton, following a bloddy fight with her husband. [PerezHilton]

Read more…

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Winehouse: Bloody Face, Slashed Hubby

Amy WinehouseThe latest installment of the Amy Winehouse saga has taken a left off of disturbing onto the expressway to tragic. On Thursday night the rehab-averse Winehouse was spotted ducking into a newsagent to pick up smokes, bloodied and her signature eye make-up smeared. Photos of her sliced up husband (commonly thought of as the British Kevin Federline) and Winehouse were quickly put up on PerezHilton.com, but here’s where the story takes a turn for the battered wife syndrome. After texting Amy to convey his concern, Perez receives several texts back, explaining what happened: “I was cutting myself after he found me in our room about to do drugs with a call girl and rightly said I wasn?t good enough for him. I lost it and he saved my life.” As time goes on Winehouse gets more and more agitated that Perez hasn’t posted her version of events, stating her husband “deserves the truth, he is an amazing man who saved my life again and got cut badly for his troubles. All he get is horrible stories printed about him and he just keeps quiet, but this i too much.” So let’s get this straight — he’s cool with getting sliced with razor blades and finding his wife doing drugs in a bathroom, but the final straw is “lies” on the internet?