by (@katespencer)

More Mice Shenanigans from Amy & Pete

Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty have posted a second video of their tiny day old mice – complete with closeups of their dirty fingernails. One mouse even has a message for Amy’s hubby Blake Incarcerated! Seriously, someone needs to call PETA asap.

by (@katespencer)

Delirious Amy Winehouse Mumbles to Mice

Um, nothing says TGIF like this video of Amy Winehouse cooing weird words to a newborn mouse while wearing just her bra, natch. Pete Doherty even makes a crazy cameo in the end. You never know what’s gonna happen when you put two British drug addicts together in the same room. Magic could happen, but normally only sad weirdness ensues.? Watch and feel uncomfortable.

by (@katespencer)

Amy Cheats on Blake Incarcerated

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There’s nothing like having the world find out that you cheated on your jailed husband with your manager’s assistant; but it’s far worse when the source of the news is your DAD. That’s the sitch Amy Winehouse has found herself in this morning, but she’s probably too drunk/stoned/crazy to notice. Papa Winehouse is super pissed about his daughter’s violent outbursts last week that landed her in jail (see pic above), so he’s speaking out to the only people who will listen to him – the tabloids.

After ranting on about Amy’s current health crisis, Mitch Winehouse dished the dirt on Amy’s alleged romance with her manager/babysitter, Alex Haynes. “I am shocked. His job was to look after Amy. I asked him to stay with Amy while she was recording at Henley. This was not part of the job! I don’t like infidelity. But Alex could be the victim in all this. I can’t ever imagine Alex seducing Amy. He looks like Clark Kent. It was clearly the other way round and Amy had her wicked way with him. But I would never dream of putting those two together.”

Will Amy divorce her jailbird for a super hero? Only time – and hopefully rehab – will tell! [NOTW]

by (@katespencer)

Amy Winehouse Really Wants to Go to Jail

amy.jpgWon’t someone please just arrest Amy Winehouse? It’s clearly what she wants in life, more than her husband, a hit album, Grammys, and her health. Last night Wino was out in foggy London-town getting hammered at a pub, and ended her night head-butting a fellow bar patron who was trying to hail her a cab home. She also allegedly punched another customer, did drugs in the street, made out with her male companion and overturned tables in the pub. A spy even claimed that Amy was screaming, “I am a legend, get these people out. I want to take drugs.”

Officers are now officially investigating the incident(s), and Amy could very well be charged and arrested. So please, Scotland Yard, come on over and round up your girl. It’s what she wants most in this world. [The Sun]

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Look and Smell Like Amy Winehouse

winehouseAmy Winehouse is adding to her already extensive resume; in addition to being a Grammy-award winning singer, a convict’s wife, and — depending on when you talk to her — a habitual drug user (or a recovering one), Winehouse is planning on releasing a line of cosmetic products. Known more for her voice than her personal hygiene, Winehouse does sport a unique style that’s been cited by designers as inspiring since she first hit the scene.

“Amy?s style has been copied by girls around the country and there?s a lot of money to be made. It?s a very distinctive look,” a source close to the deal told The Sun. In anticipation of the cosmetics deal Amy is sitting down to ink his week, we came up with a prospective product line:

*Rat’s Nest Hair Spray

*Lip Stain in Self-Harm

*Easy-Run Eye Liner for visiting your hubby in jail (color: Blake Incarcerated)

*Eau d’ Hotel Mini Bar

*Nose Powder

by (@katespencer)

Tuesday: Nicole Ditches Baby for LA Bashes

nicolerichie0212.jpgFergie Plans Shotgun Wedding
What’s she gonna do with her lovely baby bumps? Walk down the aisle asap so no one notices that she’s preggers. [NY Post]

Nicole Can?t Stop Post-Baby Partying
You’d get out of the house too after lugging a baby around for 9 months. Mom power! [Us]

Paris Loses Her Pussy
Don’t get your hopes up – we’re talking about her cat. She left it at the vet and hasn’t picked it up in weeks, so it’s going back to a shelter. [TMZ]

Brit?s BFF Sam Tried to Take her Cash
Note to Britney – that’s what people who randomly come into your life when you’re vulnerable really want. [Us]

Natalie Cole Bashes Winehouse?s Win

The aging diva thinks Amy shouldn’t have won a Grammy (or five) until she’s sober. If the Grammys followed this rule, no one in the biz would ever win anything (um, including Natalie?).

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Amy Grabs Grammys, Drops Hubby?

amy_winehouseTabloid staple Amy Winehouse cleaned up last night at the Grammys in more ways than one, winning five out of the six categories she was nominated for. The singer reminded the world what she was famous for when she performed “You Know I’m No Good” and “Rehab.” But there was one person who might have been less than thrilled for Winehouse — her husband, Blake Fielder-Civil. It seems Blake’s a bit worried since Amy’s been attempting to climb on the wagon, and he knows that if she gets sober, there’s a distinct possibility Winehouse might see him for the leech he is. According to Perez Hilton, Blake decided not to discuss these concerns with his Grammy-winning wife, and instead wrote an open letter to his wife, pleading with her to stay, and releasing it to the media:

Baby, oh darling. Please don’t leave me Amy. I’m so worried that now you’re thinking straight you’ll realise I’m not worthy of you. Oh God, please don’t leave me. I’ll do anything to show you my heart and loyalty is with you. I did tell my mum how you fell asleep on visits ? and although sometimes I think your dad hurts me unnecessarily I love him and respect him. Me and my family are finished for good. No visits, phone calls, nothing. I love my new family and can’t wait to show them I’m not just a f*cking loser and that I can look after their daughter. That’s if you can find it in your heart to trust me. Your [sic] my family now, if you’ll all have me. Pls don’t leave me Amy, Pls. I love you so much, Blake xxx.

Note: Blake, if she’s so worth it, spell out “please.” Also, we don’t think you have much to worry about; during her performance last night she screamed out “Blake” and thanked “my Blake incarcerated” during her acceptance speech for Record of the Year. You’ll recall that Amy’s mom wrote her an open letter back in December, pleading with her to get help. What is it with this family that they only communicate through open letters to tabloids?

by (@katespencer)

Monday: Paris Simply Sucks on Big Screen

parishilton021108.jpgParis Hilton?s Movie Not Hot at Box Office
Her unfunny flick The Hottie and the Nottie made no money over the weekend, which is wonderfully hilarious. [TMZ]

Ashton Celebrates his B-Day with Bruce
Next time you think your family is weird, just imagine Bruce Willis eating cake with his hands at his ex-wife’s husband’s 30th birthday party. Feel better?? [NYDN]

Is Scarlett Engaged to Alanis? Ex?
The actress (who dates Ryan Reynolds) was spotted wedding dress shopping with her mom, fueling engagement rumors.? [NYP]

Britney?s B*tchy Grammy Commentary
We’re so glad Brit’s out of the hospital, so she can charmingly tell the Grammys to kiss her ass. British Britney is just pissed she didn’t get a nod for Best New Artist.? [TMZ]

Amy Finally Fixes that Tooth
Eff all her awards, her dentist should win an prize for that work.? [DListed]

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Grammys Gossip: Who’s In, Who’s Out, And What They’ll Wear

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* Amy Winehouse has been a denied a visa and will not be attending this Sunday’s Grammy Awards. The singer, who recently entered rehab and was planning on attending the ceremony, will perform via satellite. ?I?m really sorry I can?t be there but I appreciate that I?m being given a second chance via satellite,? Amy told UsWeekly.

* Hayley Williams and her band Paramore are headed to the Grammys, but don’t think they’ll forsake their punk roots and go glam for the event: “We?ve never worked with a stylist before, so this is a different world from what we?re used to. We don?t want to abandon our background — like I come out there wearing a gown. We?re going to have fun with it.” Williams thinks the band, up for the Best New Artist Grammy, has a shot at winning. “It?s possible we could win — we made it this far.”

* Kanye West, up for eight nominations at Sunday night’s award show, is planning an emotional tribute to his mother, who died this past November due to complications from plastic surgery. Ye will perform “Stronger” and “Hey Mama.”

* After paying tribute to ’80s smashes by New Order and Michael Jackson on his year’s multi-single-spawning release Good Girl Gone Bad, Rihanna will perform with The Time, who you might remember as Prince‘s musical competition in Purple Rain. The band, formerly led by Morris Day, will be reuniting for the occasion. Let’s hope they do “Umbrella,” (originally written for a certain out-of-control pop star).

Be back here on Sunday night at 8 p.m., where we’ll be dishing on all the performances.