by (@katespencer)

Is Taylor Swift’s New Song “All Too Well” About Jake Gyllenhaal? Here’s Solid Evidence That Says Yes.

Taylor Swift‘s new album Red comes out on Monday, and yes – we will be buying it. But it also leaked online this week and the songs are now all over the web, and yes – we’ve been listening (and loving it). Our favorite song is “All Too Well,” which reflects on a relationship that is no longer. Taylor recently told VH1 that fans are often way off about who her songs are about, saying, “There are a lot of songs that people think is about this dude, but it’s really not. It’s actually about this guy you have no idea I even dated. Or you’ll sit there and go ‘that song was inspired by three different situations with three different people.” But still, we’re pretty confident “All Too Well” is 100% about Jake Gyllenhaal, and we’ve got evidence that matches the lyrics as hardcore proof. Get out your magnifying glasses, Swifties!

EXHIBIT A

LYRIC: “I walked through the door with you. The air was cold, but something ’bout it felt like home somehow and I left my scarf there at your sister’s house and you still got it in your drawer even now.”
EVIDENCE:

by (@katespencer)

Wednesday: Jessica Wants Us to Like Her

jessica-simpson-1114.jpgJessica Simpson?s Fake Boyfriends
Apparently her dad is responsible for planting items about Jess and Owen Wilson to help promote her image and album. Cuz everyone loves a girl who dates a charity case! [MSNBC]

Jon Bon Jovi for Governor of Jersey?
The rocker is ready to give politics a bad name. As in Governor Bon Jovi. [NYP]

Pics Prove Jake & Reese?s Love
Sure they’re boring, but they’re also kind of perfect together in that ‘sometimes it’s fun to watch paint dry’ sort of way. [Us]

Angelina Jolie the Journalist
The actress is penning a piece for The Economist, which we hope is about how making babies with Brad Pitt will change the world. [Us]

Britney Heads Back to Court
Here’s a tip Brit – have one of your babies drive and you won’t end up back in court every couple of days. [TMZ]

by (@katespencer)

Tuesday: Lindsay Lends a Hand

lindsaylohan-1113.jpgPhotog Chasing Britney Hit By Car
A “spotter” who was following the pop star to the Four Seasons was hit by another paparazzo’s car and seriously injured. Welcome to the painful world of Brit Watch. [TMZ]

Lindsay Does Time at Red Cross
LiLo has started her community service working at the organization’s blood services facility. Wouldn’t it be more helpful if she just hid out for ten days? [People]

T.I. Convinced He?ll Go Free
The rapper is convinced he’ll be “exonerated” of the charges against him. That’s the spirit! [Yahoo]

Posh Ready to Pop Out Baby #4?
The Spice Mom is rumored to be pregnant with a daughter who she can prompty ruin with bad outfits and poor eating habits. [OK]

Reese & Jake Sneak Off on Vacation
The new lovers headed to Napa for some private R&R. Someone should tell them that they can cuddle all they want in LA – no one cares! [OK]

by (@katespencer)

Friday: Colbert Canned in Carolina

colbert-1102.jpgColbert Can?t Run for Prez
The South Carolina democrats won’t let the state’s “favorite son” on the presidential ballot. We smell a write in! [DListed]

Eminem Busy with New Babe
So this is what the rapper’s been up to for the past few year’s – getting laid. [NYP]

Britney?s Ex-Manager Sues the Star
Who hasn’t Britney screwed over in the past couple of years? At least she already knows her way around the courthouse. [Us]

Jake and Reese Heat up Halloween
The actor took Reese’s two kids trick-or-treating dressed as a gorilla. It really is love, after all! [Us]

Arrest Expected at Oprah?s School
Let this be a lesson for her school’s students – and the world. Nobody messes with Oprah, b*tches. Nobody! [People]

by (@katespencer)

Wednesday: Ashley Olsen Makes Out with Lance Armstrong

ashley-olsen-1031.jpgTomKat Ready to Give Suri a Sibling
- Or Katie just needs another friend to hang out with since her old ones are probably banned from their house now. [OK!]

Ashley Olsen Kisses Lance Armstrong
He may not be old enough to be her dad, but he’s tall enough to be her…climbing tree? Is that really sexy? [NYP]

J Lo?s New Flick Gets Panned
Everything Jennifer Lopez does these days is getting booed. She should just tell us that she’s pregnant so we can like something she’s created. [NYP]

Britney Refuses to Promote Album
Brit’s too lazy/crazy/tired/drunk/hungry/cold/spacey/stupid to promote her new album, and her label’s given up on trying to make her work. Psssst – tempt her with Taco Bell. [NYDN]

Reese and Jake?s Love: Real or Fake?
Check out this video of the pair cuddling on the beach and feeding each other. Who does that? People faking a relationship to create buzz for their failing film, perhaps? [TMZ]

by (@katespencer)

Monday: Oprah Sorry About Sex Scandal

oprah-winfrey_1029.jpgOprah Apologizes for School Scandal
The media queen feels so awful about the abuse scandal at her South African school that she’s given students her personal phone, email and mailing addresses. Score! [NYDN]

Paris: Skanky & Scary for Halloween
Paris flaunts her ass cheeks for a costume party. It’s the scariest sight of the night! [DListed]

Video: Britney Mobbed at Courthouse
The sketchy starlet gets swarmed as she leaves her custody hearing. We can’t help but feel that she kinda deserves it. [x17]

Jake & Reese: Costumed Cuteness
We admit it – they’re a cute couple, especially when we can’t see their oh-so-perfect faces. [DListed]

Ellen?s Dog Drama Gets Stupid
Do we really give a s**t about Ellen’s dog bowls? Someone put this story to sleep. [NYP]

by

50 Cent: The Real Hottest Bachelor

Fifty_2
People Magazine‘s Hottest Bachelors issue is out, featuring the sweet , hunky faces of Blake Lewis, Jake Gyllenhaal and Ludacris. But they might want to revise their list to add 50 Cent, who just got $100 million richer.

The hip-hop star is packing away a ton of cash from his deal with Glaceau, the makers of Vitamin Water. Fifty signed on to have a drink named after him (Formula 50) in exchange for equity in the company as a shareholder. Glaceau was just bought by Coca Cola in a massive $4.1 billion deal, and now the rapper is set to rake it in, adding to his already enormous pile of millions.

It’s really cute that single Blake Lewis can beat-
box and all, but wouldn’t you rather have a man with millions upon millions of dollars – and a ton of crazy tattoos?