Reality TV stars are loud, aggressive and outrageous. It’s practically idiotic to think they wouldn’t channel a similar aesthetic when it comes to makeup. Most of us aim for sensible and chic when caking our faces, but reality TV darlings take a more—erm—liberal approach. These three rules are Scripture:
Yes, reality TV makeup is a rare brand of slay. But we appreciate it like, um, a small-town carnival—nauseating, but kind of cool. These 10 kweens are masters of the tacky trade. And it’s time we tribute them properly.
Check out more from VH1’s month-long Keepin’ It Real reality TV package.
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1 Teresa Giudice, The Real Housewives of New JerseyBravo
Smeared mascara chic. -
2 Ramona Singer, The Real Housewives of New York CityTumblr
Undressing you with her eyes. -
3 Kim Kardashian, Keeping Up with the KardashiansE!
It’s OK, Queen Kim. We’ve all been here. (But waterproof makeup would have been clutch in this moment.) -
4 Alexis Neiers, Pretty Wild
You can’t blame Nancy Jo for this clumpy mascara, Alexis. -
5 Phaedra Parks, The Real Housewives of AtlantaBravo
Lemon Popsicle is never a good eye shadow color, P—especially when paired with mint green nail polish. What’s happening here? -
6 Mama June, Here Comes Honey Boo BooCNN
Serving head-to-toe What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? realness. -
7 Kylie Jenner, Keeping Up with the KardashiansE!
Sometimes less is more, KyKy. -
8 Morgan Stewart, Rich Kids of Beverly HillsE!
Foundation fail. Why so pale, bb? -
9 Cynthia Bailey, The Real Housewives of AtlantaBravo
Unless you’re drunk at an Atlantic City casino at 3 a.m., this aggressively shimmery eye shadow is best left at home. Hidden. -
10 Alexis Bellino, The Real Housewives of Orange CountyBravo
And the same goes for lavender eye liner. (In fact, if you’re not 14 en route to a sleepover, don’t bother.)