We Stalked Scott Disick’s Alleged New Girlfriend To Spare You Some Time

Leave it to the professionals.

Last night, we finally found ourselves in Scott Disick’s corner and were moved watching him cry to Kourtney and her family on KUWTK about how much he missed them and his struggles in getting his life together. Today, we’re learning he has a new Swedish model girlfriend. Oh timing, you ironic bitch, you.

Us Weekly tells us that Scott has seen LA-based model Lina Sandberg (who he apparently thinks is “really hot”) a few times and wants to see “where it goes.” Whether you will fight for self-proclaimed “original queen” Kourt ’til the death like I will, or don’t even know who Kourtney and Scott are (which… are you living under a rock?), you know you won’t sleep tonight until you know who this new chick is and luckily, the Internet will provide answers.

Here’s what we gathered from our expert Insta-stalking session on Lina, the woman who will never dethrone Queen Kourtney from the palace that is our hearts:

  • She has a dog and believes in Santa.

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  • She doesn’t, however, believe in bras.

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  • She likes money, and so does Scott, so that’s good I guess.

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  • She’s mastered the neck-out selfie approach.

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  • And the pic of a pic.

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  • She likes carbonated beverages.

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  • And is an agricultural enthusiast.

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  • Here’s not one, but two Linas.

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  • Here she is sucking out our faith in Kourt and Scott’s reconciliation.

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  • Her she is channeling her inner-Gandhi.

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  • And here, reflecting on world peace.

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  • Here she is intriguing us with a photo that may or may not be of her.

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    ~Mysterious~

  • She’s a renowned lifeguard.

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  • And architect.

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  • And pole-hugger.

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  • And public squatter.

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Now you know. If this extensive intel didn’t scratch your stalking itch, head to Lina’s profile here. Maybe Scott has really moved on and maybe he hasn’t, but if there’s one thing we know for sure…

Perez Hilton

Long live the Kween.

Pizza is bae. And yes, I still say bae.
@taylorferber