What Is Taylor Swift Keeping in the Anniversary Locket Calvin Harris Got Her?

One year down. An infinite amount of hidden possibilities to go.

After nearly 10 years of hearing about Taylor Swift’s boy problems and f–kery, this Pennsylvanian found a love deeper than an acquired southern accent. She and Calvin Harris are already celebrating their one-year anniversary as a couple, and the Internet is treating it like the royal union that will make Will and Kate nothing but a tiny, pathetic footnote in the textbooks.

The couple’s shameless and cheesy social media displays lent themselves to this commotion, though. Calvin posted a snapchat vid of their one-year cake and a creepy, mildly enthusiastic “yaaaay,” while Taylor posted a photo of the engraved locket with “3.6 2015” from the BF:
We can’t help but think this gesture of *luhv* was also an economically advanced move; one that will allow Taylor to save energy-and space-in one of her few mansions. With such a busy lifestyle, Taylor can now carry all of these crucial life elements around her neck at all times.

  • 1 An emergency hex against Kanye West.
    A passive aggressive Grammy acceptance speech can only go so far.

  • 2 Backup shocked facial expressions.
    One can never get enough.

  • 3 Katy Perry’s future endorsement deals.
    Shade is mysterious until it isn’t.

  • 4 A lock of hair from each of her besties’ heads.
    BFFL taken very literally.

  • 5 New killer dance moves.
    We won’t even see ’em coming.

  • 6 Ed Sheeran.
    Why wouldn’t you carry him in your locket, honestly?

  • 7 Corey’s eyes.
    Big Machine Records
    The ones that are like a jungle.

  • 8 Lovely compliments.
    MTV Asia
    For and about herself.

  • 9 Leftovers from their one-year cake.
    What kind of decent human being would let that go to waste?

  • 10 All of her exes.
    In locket purgatory, where they can sit and think about what they’ve done.

So thoughtful, CH.

Pizza is bae. And yes, I still say bae.